I LOVE YOU (I LOVE YOU NOT)
The Marriage Test II

Entering the age of the fourth marriage - it should be as a couple we celebrate the wedding day happily - but for Me and Edi it is no different from the usual days we go through. Year after year our marriage was always tinged with quarrels. Me and Edi survive this marriage bond

because I love each other but there is shame and fear in my parents that makes me refrain from parting.

 During our marriage to Edi we settled from one rented house to another rented house with capital

selling my gold deposits that I used to deliberately keep as savings. Sometimes when it's time to renew the contract of the house I deliberately pawned the jewelry as collateral to get the cost of the home contract. Edi was not moved in the slightest to think about helping contract costs especially to buy a house.

Maybe others will think financially with both of our income as civil servants more than enough to finance our household needs let alone just buy a simple residence. But the truth is, we can't afford that. Edi's income is completely unknown to me

how much and how much use - while for our daily needs sourced from my income.

Qadarullah, several years of our journey that every year moved from one rented house to another rented house finally God gave a road of fortune that I never thought. An old man who I accidentally helped a few months ago when he almost fell from the escalator of the departure terminal at Halim Perdana Kusuma Airport offered me a side-job as an operational manager at his company with an initial salary four times my salary as a civil servant. At that time my work time was the same as usual work time but Saturday and week I have an obligation to submit a report directly to the company leadership.

That night, I received several missed calls recorded on my mobile phone.an unknown number with the area of Jakarta. Ah, who is this at all I have no acquaintance or relative with this foreign number-my inner. However, when I was about to put down my phone - the number was once again making a call.My curiosity made me answer that foreign call,

"Yes, hello good night." I tried to be friendly

"good night Mom. This is me talking to Diana's mother?' the voice from across there

"Yes right I'm alone."

"Oh well." For a moment the woman's voice paused."Introduce my mother Vera - a private secretary Mr. Winata from Sejahtera Sentosa Company." he continued to introduce himself

"Yes, Mother. There's something I can help you with,"

"Well Diana's mother, I was asked to call Mom and ask if she would be willing to meet the company's invitation with several commissioners on Monday?

"Invitation?The commissioner? ask me a little confused. "how do you mean?"

"Sorry Mom, I can't explain any further. But if you are willing to attend - we will prepare accommodation and a replacement for Mother's transportation."

"But an invitation for what? at least I have a picture.? I am more curious. It can't feel

I who is not a person in the company and completely do not know the ins and outs of the company suddenly have to meet the invitation of the meeting with the company's commissioners.

"Look at Mother. The Chairman offered Mother to join our company.for more details Mr. Chairman

directly that will explain to Mother at the meeting later." continued Vera

"I spoke to my husband first, Ms. Vera" I replied politely

"Good Mom. We are waiting for information from Mom as soon as possible, Mom. Good night, Miss Diana" the woman's voice ended the conversation on the phone.

The night I saw my husband relaxing by playing his guitar on our porch. I ventured to say hello and ask for his free time.

" Can I change my mind for a second, brother?" my word

Edi stopped his guitar playing - then his eyes glanced at me with a hint of displeasure.

"Yes.Well, what are you talking about?

I didn't answer immediately. I took the bamboo chair that had begun to waver beside Edi sitting - calmly I sat down and took a position facing Edi.

"I know and am very conscious these days we are in desperate need of a lot of money. First to pay for college your sisters and yourself. Second, we do not always continue to stay from one rented house to another" I said opening the conversation.

"Then what do you want and how?

"I want to find a side job if you allow me to." I said with confidence.

Edi moved his sitting position closer to me after listening to my words earlier. "Huh? What I'm not

heard wrong? he smiled with a slight mock smile.

"Yes. I got another job offer that earns me better." I continued.

Instantly Edi's laughter broke out as if in disbelief and mocked everything he had heard from me earlier.

"Who is the fool who offered you a job. hey, don't dream too much of you." he said, pointing his index finger at me.

"I'm not kidding. This Monday I am awaited his arrival at the Sejahtera Sentosa company commissioner meeting

in Jakarta. They want me to join their company." I continued, showing proof of my conversation with Vera's mother from the company.

Edi read all my conversations with Vera from start to finish and his once-unbelieving facial expression turned bright with a faint, fluffy smile.

"Is really? he still does not believe.

"Yes, really." I answered." Brother still remember I told you I accidentally helped an old man at the airport who was about to fall off the escalator? askaku returned

"Yes.trus?

"The old man is the owner of a large company in Jakarta. And he offered me a job in his company."

"If you work there what about your employee status? he began to be a little interested

continuation of this plan.

"I was hired to work from here. But every holiday or Saturday-sunday.I have to go with the boss to review the location of his company. Yes, technically I don't know yet what my job really is. They're just gonna talk about this Monday." I'll say.

"Ok baikah's. I'll agree. Just so much money you make later." he said casually. Edi moved from his seat - putting the guitar that had been on his lap to the chair he was sitting on. Then the man walked leisurely past Me who was still sitting in front of him.

There was a sense of sadness seeing Edi's response like that - but other than I wanted to earn more - I did too

want to busy myself with work - any job as long as I do not think about all the problems in my household with Edi.

On Monday morning, Edi and I who had informed their respective offices to not be able to run office duties as usual on Monday decided to go to Jakarta early. Edi eagerly cleaned the leather shoes that he had been wearing for how many years

to be used to our meeting in Jakarta. Whereas I've been preparing the clothes we're going to wear this morning.

"Sister, we're not late. Because we are waiting before lunch there." I reminded Edi.

"Relax really. I'm ready." she said a little in a hurry wearing shoes and then

tidying shirt.

Edi then turned on the engine of our Jeep. His deafening noisy voice actually increased

my concern to travel far from the city of Bandung to the city of Jakarta. Moreover, this car is very rarely touched by engine maintenance considering our financial condition is sufficient for our primary needs only.

"Let's get on fast" said Edi asking me to immediately board the car.

I obeyed Edi's request and took a seat next to the steering wheel.

Edi runs the car at high speed. The more he stepped on the gas the sound of the car engine was getting heard

breaking the ears from the exhaust. I don't know if the people around the road we went through were also disturbed by the sound, but Edi seemed to not care.

Sweat began to wash away the clothes we were wearing. The car's cooling engine hasn't worked since we bought it from the previous owner. Sometimes my hands rub my sweaty face with a tissue. Sometimes I also rub a tissue into Edi's face filled with sweat so that his view is not disturbed while driving.

Thank God our concern for the traffic of the city that was jammed and congested when it did not happen. Enough road

it was quiet for us to go through until we could get to our destination sooner than expected.

Edi and I rushed to the hotel lobby there waiting for Mother Vera to be helped by the hotel staff to

welcomed arrival.

" Mother Diana? she asked politely to me after a moment she observed my hurried figure

approaching recipesionoist.

"Yes Mother. Let Mother please come with me to the meeting room."he said again.then Vera glanced at Edi who was standing beside me."Diana's Mother's husband? ask her to Edi.

"Yes Mom. This introduces my husband Edi Siswanto." I said introduce him.

"Sorry, are you also willing to participate in the meeting? ask Vera again.

Edi stunned. Her eyes did not blink looking at Vera's attractive appearance with thick makeup wrapped in clothes that were tight enough that the curves of her body look perfect.

"Eh, Anu. I'll just wait in the lobby." said Edi slightly stammered.

"Oh so.Well, If you want to wait at the hotel restaurant is also okay.Then his Bill can be claimed

to our company." continued Vera again.

Edi smiled sumringah. He simply answered the offer with a nod.

It didn't take long - Me and Vera were already in a very large room with a big table in the middle of the room and I saw the old man I helped sit at the end of the table against a very large window.

"Welcome, Diana" said the old man, welcoming me without moving from his seat.

"Oh, Good afternoon Mr. Beni" I said as I walked up to him and thrust my hand to

shake hands.

The old man warmly welcomed my greetings. His face looks better than the first time

seeing him at the airport at that time, the old man looked so pale and tired.

Soon one by one the company's commissioners entered the room. Beni asked me to sit down

next to him is the vera on his right side.

"Alright, all the members have gathered in this room" he opened the conversation in the meeting.

"before I wanted to introduce this young lady sitting next to me."  Mr. Beni then pointed at me while smiling at me. I returned that smile - by trying to be more polite

stand up from my seat to introduce myself to the other members.

"His name is Diana Rahma. Diana works in government as a civil servant. He also helped me when I was almost due at the airport the other day." continued Mr. Beni.

It appears the other member nodded his head.

"I want Diana to join us. His job will accompany me to the field." continued Beni Pak

explicate

I was stunned to hear Mr. Beni's explanation. Loh, what about my work if I have to accompany Mr. Beni to work, my mind.

"Ohya, Because Diana is working as a civil servant, so He only accompanies me to work in his time off." said Mr. Beni as if to answer the hardness of my heart. "Later anything to do can be explained as Vera ya."

"Good Sir. But if allowed - May I give a response to a good offer from the Father." said I was a little hesitant.

Mr. Beni scrunched his forehead - "Did Diana object to my offer?

"No. It's not so, sir. But I have minimal experience working in a company let alone a large company

like this father's."I responded.

"I'm sure Diana can do this job well."

The discussion about joining me into the company was finally decided. I also gladly accepted the job offer - let alone the income offered was very tempting. Then Mr. Beni allowed me to leave the room - because the commissioners would submit reports on the company's developments to him that were confidential.

Vera directed me outside the room and drove me to the hotel restaurant on the first floor where Edi was waiting for me.

 "All right, Miss Diana. We will later inform you about the employment contract that I will sign and work schedule

Mr. Beni for me to learn

"Good Miss Vera. I am waiting for more information. Thank you for your help." I said again

Vera replied with a smile then the young lady left me in front of the restaurant to continue

her job.

I walked into the restaurant room and I saw Edi was still engrossed in the food that was lined up

his desk.

I don't know what he ordered - but I don't want to comment much.

"how was the meeting? he asked while his mouth was still chewing food.

"Alhamdulilah. I'll start my work next week." I replied.

"Oh that fast? What about his salary?

"As stated before."

Edi nodded happily. He swiftly finished the food he had in front of him without offering me a single bit. I who saw Edi eating with greed it felt full enough. Moreover, the pleasure of getting the opportunity to work with Mr. Beni will give hope to improve the economy of my family and Edi in the future.

Since that meeting at the hotel - of course Edi's nature has changed a lot for me. Edi was much more attentive to me - especially

ever since I started my job our financial coffers have been increasing. We finally decided to replace our old jeep car with a much better car although still our choice is to buy a used car that suits our financial capabilities.

It didn't feel like almost a year I worked at Mr. Beni's company. Last month I deliberately applied for my annual leave from the office because Mr. Beni asked me to accompany him to his branch companies in Singapore and Hong Kong for an entire week. I began to enjoy my work let alone this job more often travel to Pak Beni branch offices in several major cities in Indonesia and even abroad.

One day, I don't know what was on Mr. Beni's mind at the time, the middle-aged man frankly stated

his views on my husband Edi.

"Diana, may I speak with you about privacy?

"Oh yeah. Can sir." - I say with respect.

The man stroked his chin once in a while his hand knocked on the table as if there was a doubt within him to

continuing speech. Then the man muttered occasionally.

"Actually this has been a long time I've wanted to tell you. But I see you're very depressed inside

your marriage is then it's I have to talk about this matter."

I was increasingly curious by the words of Mr. Beni. Why did Mr. Beni want to talk about my marriage and how did he know that I was really depressed in our marriage.

" I don't like to see your husband Diana. There are many things he covers up from you. Why don't you

part from him. The longer you are with Him the farther you are from Happy."

"Sorry Sir. Why would Beni think that? ask me curious, even though I actually did not reject Mr. Beni's statement.

"Diana, you've taken me for granted like my son. I've had a marriage with my wife in the tens

Year. In my belief there is the name Feng Sui and I see the negative things that emanate from your husband's face" Beni explained.

Although many times I rejected the truth expressed by Mr. Beni, still all the words he said were a burden on my mind. Do I have to survive the wedding

this one?