
Not knowing how to and must believe or not with Reza's words, I could just sit back and finish my meal. Reza emptied his plate first. After that, I hurriedly cleaned the dining table and brought the dirty tableware to the sink. While Reza was still sitting quietly in his chair. I was sure, he kept looking at me in silence, as I found when I turned around after finishing putting the cutlery on his shelf.
"Here first" he called.
I approached. "What's wrong?" my many.
"Sit here" he said, patting his thigh. "Sit on Mas' lap."
Hmm. There is a strange feeling. I feel deg-degan. But I still follow his wishes. I sat on the thigh that used to be - was the most comfortable lap for me. And now...
Damn still. He's the most comfortable place - first, and probably last and forever.
Come on, Nara.gapain deg-degan.you already have two children, and remember - the charges against him have not been proven right or wrong. Forget about that feeling and comfort.
"Darling?"
"Emm?"
"I love you."
I love you too. But I don't want to say it right now.
"It's okay if you can't believe it yet. It's okay if you still want to silence me. But promise, don't go. Don't leave me alone. Yea? I don't want to part with you and the kids. If indeed we cannot make up, at least I can still see you, can still see the children and hug them. Promise, yeah, don't go? Don't make me a man anymore."
Again. For the next time my tears are shed. I could only nod with a tongue.
I tried to smile, but I still couldn't. "I. I go to the room first, take care of the kids. Poor Mother, she hasn't eaten."
"Yes," said Reza, then he hugged me for a moment.
After that, I stood up unwillingly to leave that most comfortable place. But I have to get out of there.
"Before going to bed, please make sure all the doors are locked, yes. I.. I go first.. up."
I left immediately, without looking. While at heart wondering, when will this ordeal end? I'm already tired.
"Had eaten?" ask my mother when I go into the room.
I nodded, then threw my body onto the bed, right next to her. "Mother hasn't eaten yet? Eat, gih. After that rest. Mommy must be tired, right?"
"OKAY. But you promise, you also take a break. Don't ask your husband to fight. Don't throw him out of the room. And don't refuse if he wants to be friendly."
Duuuh. I nodded my head and accepted my mother's request.
"Remember, dear," he said, he stroked my hair, "your father left us, and never once did he come home to talk about our family. Boro-boro he asked for a referral and was willing to leave his sir wives, never. Even your flesh and blood he never cared about. That's why you can't forgive your father. But your fate is different, honey. Your husband is still here, still keeping you. So please, you hang by his side, keep your household. Unless, if your husband is proven to betray your marriage, Mother will never stand in the way if you want a divorce. Even Mother will stand at the very front to support your decision. Yeah, honey, huh?"
I got up, sat facing him. I hugged that aging body warmly. "Nara promised, Nara will be kind and will not demand divorce as long as there is no real evidence of Mas Reza's betrayal. Thank you, yes, Bund, for all of your advice and patience during this time. Nara is lucky to have a mother figure like Mother. I love you so much."