Hot Couple: Love Story Inara Season 3
About The Heart . . . .

Four days before my 26th birthday, we got word that Reza was in the hospital. Erik said Reza had been receiving intensive care for three days because of dengue fever.

"Pak Reza asked me not to tell anyone, but I didn't have the heart" Erik said. "I couldn't take twenty-four hours to look after him because there was a lot of work at the resto. So.. sorry, I hope that Miss Nara would like to see her."

Proudly, I just stood there looking out the window even though my ears heard Erik's words, and my heart was touched. I feel sorry for someone I ignore because of my ego which is currently at the highest level.

After conveying the purpose of his arrival and providing information about Reza's condition and where he was treated, without much ado - Erik was resigned.

"So, how?" ask mom. He was standing with a tray of drinks on the table.

I'm shaking. "I won't go there" I said, without taking my eyes off.

"Still putting ego forward, son?"

"Come on, Bund."

"Are you not sorry?"

I'm silent.

"Son, to be honest, there's pity, right?"

"Em," I nodded, "there's, Bund."

"Then? Why don't you-"

"Hati Nara refused, Bund. It's still heavy."

"Emm. okay...." He's cleared his throat. "What about your feelings? Still love? Still darling?"

Again, I shook my head. "Don't know. Maybe still, maybe not."

"You want a divorce?"

I'm down. For this one question I can't agree. Even if a million times that question is asked, I will not be able to agree.

"Is it just because of the kids?"

"No" I said, shaking again.

"What is it because of concern for the views of the family and society? Don't want to be gossiped about for holding the status of a widow?"

I took a deep breath, and I said, "Nara doesn't want a divorce, because Nara's heart doesn't want that. Unless our marriage vows have been violated by Mas Reza, Nara sincerely, or if Mas Reza who wants to divorce Nara, Nara sincerely. But if asked whether or not, Nara won't."

Desaha* of relief finally escaped my mother's lips. "That means you still have hope. Aye, right?"

"Em, maybe. Nara herself is confused. Nara doesn't want to ask him to come home, Nara doesn't want to see him. But...."

Mom smiled. "If he comes home, you won't throw him out, will you?"

I just shut up. I knew I wouldn't throw him out. And that's for sure. But I also don't want my mother to persuade him to go home.

In essence, more than ninety percent of the questions and question marks in my heart, the answer refers to the word "don't know." Only when asked about divorce - my heart can answer out loud: I do not want a divorce, unless I am forced to accept the divorce, then I will accept it.

"Mother wants to go to the hospital. Are you sure you don't want to come?"

"No, Bund. Just mother. And if you can, later tonight ask Ihsan to accompany him in the hospital."

"OKAY. Later Mommy says to Ihsan, yes." Then he smiled. "Mother knows you still care. Mother's prayers and hopes are still the same."

I know, Bund. I think, so do I. I still have hope in this marriage. I don't want us to get divorced. For all the times, I took a deep breath. "Bund, please don't talk him home, yeah. Emm. I mean Nara, no need to be persuaded, let alone to beg. Let him make his own efforts to fix things. Please...."

"Mother knows, honey. Mother would not do that. But, Mother will tell you about your difficult feelings."

Yeah, whatever. Without Mommy explaining, I think he already knows and already understands. Merely, Mas Reza was afraid that if he forced himself to meet me, he was afraid that we would fight again. I knew he was afraid I was depressed and it would make things worse between us. You could say, we both know the situation, we understand the situation with each other. But everything that has happened in the past, it's like a gas pedal with brakes that have been blong. Just a little pressured, we don't know how it ends, and how are we going to stop? The mechanic is only God - only He can fix what is broken between us: heart, love, and trust.