RUSTING BOAT
Chapters. 73

I don't feel like time has passed. Two months have passed since the humiliating event that tarnished the name of Syafrie as the most handsome man in the village of Suka Rahmat. She might have fainted when I gave birth. As a result..ready - ready he was made as my new bullyan material.

Two months is also my baby's age. My baby is Fadil's sister. At first I was afraid because before this fetus was born I always thought if the fetus in my womb it would make me bother later. But in fact, the presence of this tiny baby actually makes my world beautiful and full of happiness.

For the first time I stared at the tiny tadpole that Syafrie had saved in my womb, I thought my eyes were filled with the pink color of my heart. Oh, my God, I fell in love with my daughter. I was moved, amazed and also very amazed at the beautiful little creature that squirms in a bed with its mouth gaping to and fro from thirst and hunger. I cried because of the happiness that exploded - bursting in my chest because I realized now I am truly perfect as a Mother. I really don't care about that tadpole maker anymore.

Then after two months passed, did the feeling of admiration evaporate just like that?

Oh. ' he answered, no.

There, I even felt at home for hours watching my son fall asleep. I love looking at her little face. To caress and caress every inch of the curve of my face with my finger. I love stroking and squeezing her tiny, plump hands and feet. I also like to play with her round cheeks filled like that bakpao. Piercing - pricking or pinching it slowly with the index finger. Or toying with her while breastfeeding by way of thread pulling***** my milk. I'll laugh funny because I see his round lips will open megap and then move around looking for food source. Hahaha. It was like seeing a bird starving.

I don't care if people say I'm tacky.. But I'm actually very happy. Such a small thing turned out to be able to make my heart beat happy. I felt like a kid who was just getting to know puberty. I sometimes smile - smile to myself if I remember my baby.

Understandably, this is the first time I have ever felt how to be a real mother. I really feel what it's like to take care of a baby from the first time I was born to this day.

The wound of the father's betrayal, as if it were lost. I don't know where to go. I never remembered it again. For me now my world is Fadil and also my little baby.

I'm glad I had a baby. I also didn't mind having to wake up in the middle of the night because my baby was crying from hunger. However, Syafrie did not allow her I was too tired to take care of our baby. So.. My job is to breastfeed, dress up, replace anyway and that was last night because sometimes our baby is very fussy at night. But it's okay.because like I said before, I'm sincere and happy to do everything.

But for the matter of bathing the baby, well that has just become the business of Syafrie or mama. I have not dared. I was a little horrified by his head that was still so weak. Looks very fragile. I am afraid, if at any time wrong in the way of holding, later his head will sprain or worse off?

I was traumatized when I learned to bathe Fadil's sister. Since it was the first time I bathed a child, I screamed when I saw his neck tilted left, forward to back like I had no bones. I was horrified to myself when I imagined that the neck would come off and fall on its head.

Maybe because of my screams at night, my baby got sick. She had a fever last night and kept crying. As a result, I stayed up until morning. My baby only stopped fussing after my mom called Wak Sendang, a baby shaman and shaman who was smart to treat babies who had problems like my baby. That was the first and last time I bathed my baby. After that I will not interfere again in the business of bathing - bathing. Let it all be a matter of mama or Syafrie.

Usually after bathing Afika, as we gave our son a name, I felt at home for a long time staring at him.

Fadil's sister was very influential on the change in me. As he looked at her, tears of regret spilled over. I remember a long time ago, countless caci maki that I addressed to Fika when she was still in the womb. Worse still, I intend to abort my womb because of my deep and great hatred for his father.

Yep.. Allah.so great is my sin.

If only I knew, having a baby like Fika would be this fun. It seems I should indeed thank Syafrie for giving sleeping pills in the bottle that night.

I've fallen in love - the fall on Fika. So whatever the behavior of our baby that for others may feel very disturbing, to me just the opposite. Likewise with the mistake that became the reason for Afika into this world, I can forgive her. I sincerely forgive all the mistakes of Syafrie in the past.

With Fika I went through the day without feeling boring or tired. Playing with my children and spending time with Fadil and Fika became my daily life today. Sometimes I feel that our time together is less, because Fadil has to go to school and Fika who sleeps because she is tired of playing. If so, I feel sad and lonely. So, by all means I always teased Fika to open her eyes and play with me again. If this is the case, usually my mother will immediately scold me for disturbing her grandson's sleep. Mama said, babies do have a long sleep time so that he grows up quickly. I could only grumble to myself because I was upset that I couldn't see Fika's adorable round eyeballs.

Split for a while with Fika I can't stand it. I always wanted to be alone with Fika. Fika that's already my canduku. Just shafrie until the head rings saw me and Fika who are like stamps with letters only. Anyway, I can't stay away from my little baby for long.

But today I got a surprise. Unexpectedly, Mas Haris, the man whose name I had erased from my heart, contacted me via chat, saying he wanted to see me.

Oh. yes I remember. We still have unfinished business. That's why we have to meet. I have to finish all the affairs of the heart that we haven't had time to finish just yet.

I will say goodbye words and take off Mas Haris with a smile. No more anger and resentment. It's all just the past. I have given up all of our dreams and aspirations. Let it be. It may be true, my soul mate is Syafrie. The man chosen by God as the man who accompanies my life. No matter what kind of betrayal wounds he had scratched in my heart in the past, but now I sincerely forgive him.

I want to say farewell words to Mas Haris and live each other's lives without any more grudges in my heart.

" You want to go alone? Not waiting for Syafrie to drive you? " ask Brother Lela. He stood beside me as I took the helmet and walked towards my new scoopy that only a few days ago had Syafrie bought for me, she said as a gift to me.

Only Lela's sister, the only person in the house I told you about Mas Haris' chat last night. My sister actually wanted to forbid me to go to meet Isna's husband. However, I insisted on seeing him because I had to meet Mas Haris to solve our problem. I know Kak Lela's anxiety. He was afraid that I would change my mind and intend to return with Mas Haris. Because I am now finished giving birth.

"Who's the same, Asthma? " ask Luna again.

" I'm playing Fika with Syafrie, sister, "I said while starting the bike.

" Why not just stick with us. Let us take care of Fika. Any minute now, Fadil is home from school. There are a lot of people who will take care of Fika. Means Syafrie can take you to meet Haris, Asma." Brother Lela is still trying to prevent me from seeing Mas Haris alone.

" After all, Haris must be here with his wife. Must have been his wife who was also taken when she met you. Aren't you awkward if there's no Syafrie there accompanying you ? "

Oh, my God.. Yeah, too? Why don't I think about getting there. It is likely true that Mas Haris will take his wife there. They are already married. Certainly where - where, Mas Haris will be with Isna. Moreover, Isna knew exactly who I was. Ex-lover Mas Haris who begs for love and whines - whine not to be abandoned.

" Syafrie chirped me, sister." I finally slipped too.

Actually I don't want anyone to know that Fadil's father is keeping me quiet. He is very irritable to talk. I rarely spoke to him unless he was in front of my family.

I don't want to lose either. He was silent, I was silent too. Prestigious also feels if you have to greet first the man you often ignore his presence. Now the man is like keeping his distance and seems to avoid me. Now I have to be honest with Sister Lela about Fadil's father who silenced me.

" Maybe he's angry because you want to meet an ex? If you know that, you better not go, Asthma! "

Syafrie, angry? Akh.....Dreams only times I could see Syafrie angry. You see, I don't believe in the size of a guy who just wants to talk in front of my family and when helping to take care of Fika, he can make a sound. Cheese..... Syafrie tai...

I don't know why the end of this upset me back again to Fadil and Fika's father.