Doctor Ella Love Story
111. S2 - Regret

Love is not letting go but letting go

Not forcing but fighting

Not giving up but giving up

Not chained but gave wings

_Fiersa Bessari_

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"Is Ella really happy?..." I don't know why that helpless question came out of Ardi's mouth. Though Ardi was very reluctant to look weak in front of Roni. Lose the shitty rival of his.

"At least Ella never cried again. And I will always accompany him, look after him and make him happy. I'm not gonna let go of her hand, leave her like you did to Ella..." Roni ended their conversation very dramatically before turning his back on Ardi, leaving the study.

Ardi fell silent unable to refute Roni's words that seemed to be able to hit him very hard. It was true that he had let go of Ella's hand, leaving the girl. She also made Ella sad and cry. It's only natural that Roni, even Ella herself, thinks of him as an irresponsible jerk.

"You better know yourself...Don't go near Ella again!" Roni added her words as she reached the door of the room. Closing the door leaf with a little hard pounding, in addition to his bluff on Ardi.

Ardi remained standing until Roni left this workroom. Even when Roni closed the door tightly with a little hard pounding. Shit, he's getting brave enough to challenge me! Ardi in the heart.

Ardi's brain felt full, too busy to digest all Roni's words. Ardi's chest also felt so tight and sick. Pain that feels very real even though it does not bleed. The words and words of Roni who was as sharp as an arrow, seemed able to stab and hit directly through his heart.

With a giant step Ardi returned to Mahes's work chair, threw his body, sat there and rested his head on the back of the chair. Closing his eyes and regulating his breathing to try to reorganize his heart, relieve the emotions raging in his chest and restore the intelligence in his brain to thinking.

Trying to make himself more focused on thinking. Think and think about what has happened over the past three years.

Ardi remembered everything. Whatever happened after the night of his farewell to Ella. Ardi also remembered what efforts he had made to get Ella back during these three years?

Nothing, no real effort was seen from him to show his sincerity to Ella. Ardi even seemed to disappear swallowed by the earth just like that. He never tried to come to see the girl. It's not impossible because Ardi already knows where Ella lives and studies. He should have come and found the girl.

But Ardi chose not to. Ardi chose to go away and disappear from Ella's life. At first, Ardi wanted Ella to forget that she was starting a new life. Similarly, Ardi also hopes to forget Ella at that time.

Until finally Ardi was too busy even to be lulled with all the work affairs that became his escape from all his heartbreak. Escape to be able to forget a little about all the suffering and inner torment of losing Ella from her side, the failure of her love.

'When I lost you, I was just thinking about learning to let go. Until I finally realized that forgetting you is not that easy to do. Your name and figure seemed to have been fixated in my heart.

Giving up on you is one thing I have to live with. But it's actually so hard for me to understand. I don't even remember how I could have lived my life these three years without you by my side.

I don't I don't want to let you go. I only regret my weakness fighting for you to stay by my side. Why did I let you go back then? Why don't I fight harder to make you mine? I gave up losing to the circumstances that separated me and you...'

All the regrets and guilt that stifled the chest back swirled in Ardi's head. All his helplessness and the greatest regret of his life. Release Ella from his side...

Various questions flashed and resonated in Ardi's head. A question he could not answer at all. Questions about her love relationship that seem to have no hope anymore. Making himself more and more drowning in regret and despair.

'Are you really happy now?

Is it true that you can forget me?

Didn't you ask me to wait?

Didn't you ask me for three years?

Now after three years I'm back.

I'm coming back to you to continue our delayed love story.

But why are you turning away?

Are you tired of waiting for me?

Or just don't trust me that much?

You don't believe in my love for you?

So you choose to be with someone else.

And buried our love story.'

For a long time Ardi was silent and pondered, thinking and thinking without finding answers and solutions. Until he realized one thing...Is Ella here now? Is he at this party?

Ardi got up from Mahes's work chair, walking through the room. Rush out of the study and end up in the second-floor corridor. His eyes rolled out to look for that figure. Ella, where is he? Ardi's gaze stopped on the two walking figures with arms interlocked, descending the circular staircase to the first floor.

There's no mistaking it, that figure, Ella. Ardi was sure to be right even by just looking at the figure behind him that the girl was Ella. The girl who was walking side by side with a man. Nothing else and nothing but that jerk, Roni.

The leaflet on Ardi's chest reappeared, initially slowly but increasingly harder and timid. For the sake of seeing the beautiful face of Ella, with a sweet smile that always sits on her lips.

There was something a little different about Ella's appearance this time. Ella cut her long hair to shoulder length by adding a curly accent. Her face is also not as smooth as before, now Ella is smart to combine the color of makeup to daub her face. Ella's dress is still flawless but looks fresh, mature, smart and classy.

Ardi pulled over to the back of the balcony upstairs, his eyes could not be separated from Ella and Ella. He tried to ignore Roni who was on the girl's side. Roni held Ella's arm gently.

Ardi felt very angry to see Ella's facial expression that did not show rejection of Roni's treatment. So did Ella choose that son of a bitch? So is it true what Roni said that Ella is happy now? Happy by his side?

'Is it time for me to give up? Do I have to throw away any expectations about our relationship?' thought Ardi.

Well if Ella herself chooses to be with Roni. If Ella could live her life happier. If indeed Roni can be happier Ella than him. Maybe Ardi just had to let it go, let the girl go.

Single-minded? a very easy word to say. But it turned out to be very difficult and not that easy to do. The heat of the jealous flames slowly began to spread burning Ardi's body to see the intimacy between Roni and Ella.

"So right said Roni? Are you happy now? So you've forgotten me, El? Forgetting everything that happened between us?" the weak Ardi Guman was helpless.

Whether intentionally or not, Ardi feels that Roni is deliberately to show off her closeness and affection with Ella to him. Intentionally shows that he has won and managed to snatch Ella's heart from Ardi. Roni did not even know the shame of deliberately feeding a spoonful of food to Ella in public.

If only Ardi had seen Ella show a little dislike. If only Ella looked uncomfortable and rejected Roni's actions. So Ardi will not hesitate to approach them, maybe even he will approach, pull and seize Ella from Roni's side at this time.

But in fact all Ardi's hopes did not happen. Ella seems ordinary and straightforward to accept Roni's treatment of her. The girl did not seem at all objectionable, uncomfortable or reject Roni's actions. Making Ardi even more helpless to see it, no longer have a reason to take Ella from Roni's side. Not if it's true Ella is already happy and sets her heart for Roni.

"Suckers! The fucking jerk." said Ardi furious and angry while gripping the iron fence of the balcony guard tightly.

I don't know why he remembered the incident when he fed Sari at his mother's birthday party first. 'Shit! I must have karma. What I did to Ella turned to me now.' Ardi cursed in his heart.

So this is how much pain Ella felt? Ella could have ended up very sad that time. This is how the pain of helplessness, regret and heartbreak merge into one.

"Sir? Mr Ardi?" Bambang approached and called out to Ardi in confusion. He had repeatedly called but still there was no answer at all from his boss.

Why else is this the boss? see what is serious? Bambang became worried and curious about the state of Ardi. What was Ardi looking at so seriously downstairs?

Bambang stood next to Ardi. Following Ardi's gaze downstairs. He could see the girl, the girl who always disturbed the calmness of her boss, Ella.

It's just fitting that Ardi looks dumb and so emotional. From the top floor it can be seen clearly that the girl was with another man. Looks very harmonious, intimate and friendly with the man. The man who has been caught on camera many times, and also reported by Ardi's men every few days.

"Lho's mbang?..." Ardi was a little surprised to realize Bambang was already standing next to him.

"I just want to ask Mr. Ardi to go back to the office or still want to be here? Friends have all returned to the office." Bambang explained the meaning of his arrival.

"Here we go..." Ardi still could not take his eyes off Ella.

"Mother has eaten? The food in the guest room was cold. I'll ask you to replace it with a new one." Bambang made sure his boss had eaten or not.

During the party, she did not see Ardi at all. After looking everywhere finally Bambang found his boss was sleeping on the sofa workspace. Must have not eaten him, even the food prepared in the guest room for him had not been touched either.

"Add two bottles of wine."

"But tomorrow there's a board meeting, sir." Bambang is afraid that Ardi will get drunk tonight.

"Papa drank a little. You will join me later. Heartbreak party."

"Wasn't he?" Bambang inexhaustible, kok broken heart is still looted after three years.

"Part two."

"Good, sir." Bambang according to him did not dare to argue anymore. Bambang switched to find a maid and meet Ardi's demand.

While Ardi who had been eneg looking at Ella and Roni also moved from his position. Walking gontai to the guest room where he will party heartbroken.

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