Painful Marriage
CHAPTER 51

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The time of night is approaching. Dee stood on the balcony of her room while looking at the star that looked very beautiful. There were no tears the woman who was no longer young was dripping just like that.

Why would Zahra pay for everything? He was born as if only to pay karma for the wrongs of two human beings who were Abi and her Mother. What did I feel, why did he feel it now? Disabled, ostracized, hurt by her own husband, and living alone raising a child without a husband. Why should Zahra bear it, Lord? What kind of happiness are you preparing for him to have to live the trials of life like this? Inner Dee cried considering how heavy the life lived by a child of her husband who came from the womb of another woman. And Dee loved Zahra as much as Lady Kandung.

Dee's outstretched hand wiped her tears when she heard the door open. Dee turned her head and looked at Ibra who entered the room with her sweet smile to the wife.

"Not sleeping, dear," said Ibra walking up to his wife. The older, the couple looks more friendly, even spoiled Ibra more spoiled than the grandson, Shasa to Mama. Ibra is more spoiled to Dee.

"Not yet," Dee replied with a sweet smile.

Dee and Ibra stood face to face. Ibra looked at his wife's cheek and saw a trail of tears. "Why?" ibra asked as she rubbed Dee's cheek with her index finger.

Dee shook her head with a smile. "Just miss Zahra" Dee said honestly.

"Don't make sad because of the existence of someone who has died, dear," said Ibra who believes that Zahra had indeed died due to the flood disaster six years ago in the city of Tarim.

Dee shook her head. "My son is still alive" Dee replied softly but firmly.

Ibra. "He always lives in our hearts, dear," replied Ibra.

Ibra hugged Dee tightly. "Thank you for loving and receiving Zahra so well like, Honey. I don't know what would have happened in my life if you weren't my wife" Ibra said gently stroking Dee's hair that wasn't covered in her hijab.

Dee let go of his embrace and looked at Ibra. "Zahra is present because of a compulsion you do, but his presence in our lives really gives us a lot of happiness. Unknowingly, he paid for all his karma for his parents' mistakes. Indirectly, he paid for all the tears that were spilled here, Mas," said Dee pointing to his own eyes with a gaze that could not be separated from Ibra.

Ibra was silent at Dee's words. "Sorry dear," said Ibra.

Dee smiled. Both of his hands raised gently rubbing both of Ibra's shoulders. "Don't apologize too often, Mom. We've been happy for a long time, haven't we" Dee said.

Ibra nodded and hugged Dee again. There is no greater gratitude than having you, dear. Inner Ibra was grateful to have Dee in her life.

I'll bring Zahra back, and bring back your smile, Mas. I know, you harbored your own feelings for Zahra. Inner Dee.

.....

While in another house, Bu Sari and Zahra are making doughnuts for tomorrow emphasized in the stalls. While Sela had fallen asleep half an hour ago, after completing her schoolwork.

"Zahra," said Ms. Sari seriously.

"Yes, ma'am" Zahra replied without turning her eyes to the cookie dough in her hand.

"Don't hold your own grief" said Bu Sari who was able to stop Zahra's activities.

Zahra looked at Bu Sari with her sweet smile. "Nobody is sad, ma'am," said Zahra.

Zahra resumed her activities. Ms. Sari just kept quiet by looking at Zahra. I have to make sure of my doubts. Batin Bu Sari's. He was convinced that his memory of Kenzo driving Sela home from school was correct. He is the father of Kandung Sela. Kenzo was the same man he had seen when he drove Zahra back to the Hebi family, but Zahra refused. He was sure that the man who was Sela's biological father, and the man who made Zahra so hurt was Kenzo.

"You're sad that Sela found her Bladder's father" Bu Sari said without further ado.

Zahra immediately looked at Bu Sari with an indecipherable look. "Selas only have Mommy, Mom. Not with Dad" said Zahra.

"But the one you went to secretly from behind the front tree of our house was Father Kandung Kenzo" said Bu Sari who was able to display a look of surprise on Zahra's face.

"Sela deserves to know about her father, son," said Bu Sari gently staring at Zahra.

Zahra. "Having Mother alone is enough for Sela, Mom," said Zahra kekeuh with her determination.

"That's what you think, but not Sela. Don't be selfish, Zahra" replied Ms. Sari.

"Sela must understand the sadness of the Mother, Mom," replied Ms. Sari.

Ms. Sari shook her head. "The natural thing is a parent who must understand how the wishes of his child's heart, not vice versa, son. Do not let your child feel the inner suffering of missing his father. Especially at such a small age. Don't force your child to grow up prematurely" said Ms. Sari, who made Zahra's heart so sick to hear.

After saying that, Ms. Sari left just like that leaving Zahra who was speechless with a troubled heart after hearing her words. "Am I really selfish with my son?" zahra asked herself.

"I'm sorry, Mother, Sela," said Zahra.

Sela continued her dough until it was finished. After an hour, Zahra cleaned up all the kitchen utensils and went to Sela's room. There, Zahra could see Sela sleeping soundly, and not forgetting Anna in her arms.

Zahra returned to her room. His outstretched hand took a picture frame featuring the face of a handsome man. Kenzo, the man Zahra looks at every night in the shade, even if it's just from a photo.

"Do you accept Sela knowing she's my son, sister? Do you accept Sela knowing that she is the child born from the womb of the woman you hate? I'm just afraid Sela will get a rejection like I got. It was very painful, Brother Ken," said Zahra tearfully looking at Kenzo's photo and rubbing gently with her finger.

"I have to how? One side is my heart, and on the other side is my son's right to know his father. I'm supposed to how?" zahra lirih.

"God, help me make wise decisions for myself and my son. Help me to be a strong woman and a wise mother to my daughter" Zahra said with heartfelt prayers to her creator.

.....

The sound of Adzan woke a little girl from her sleep. Sela woke up from her sleep and sat leaning on the head of the bed. "Kok Buna didn't wake up Cela?" the boy muttered in wonder. Usually, the Mother would wake him up for the Fajr Prayer.

Sela got out of bed and out of her room. "Grandmother," called Sela when she saw that Ms. Sari was going to the bathroom.

"Eh, Sela is awake" said Ms. Sari.

Sela nodded. "Where's Buna, Grandma? Why don't you wake up Cela?" ask Sela.

Zahra's not awake yet? Inner Bu Sari was astonished, because usually Zahra will wake up first from all of them.

"Maybe Mother of soy sauce, son. Try Sela wake Mother," said Bu Sari.

Sela nodded and walked towards her mother's room. The boy opened the door of the room that was unlocked. "Buna mengidul," muttered Sela saw Zahra who was still sleeping soundly.

Sela walked up to Zahra. "This is a picture of a woman?" tanya Sela saw a picture frame in her mother's arms.

Slowly, Sela took the photo.

Successfully, the boy managed to take his picture frame. Sela turned the frame. "Dad."

......................

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