The Tarnished Holy
Meet

"Nafis, below is someone who wants to see you. !"Umi stroked my head very gently, a radiance of affection I found in her deep gaze.While , I still remained silent unmoved with my flat gaze .kemarin, I was still,I was just about to put my life back on .However, the arrival of Gus Pati to ask me to make the arrangement fall to zero. And I was fully aware, that I had returned to real destruction.

"Nafis has said, 'Nafis has not met anyone, 'umi !"my protest while looking up, looking into the eyes of Umi with a look of supplication .I want to be alone again, anyone..Doesn't anyone understand how I feel here?

"Pity you know naf, they are far from Jakarta. Below is a man who wants to propose to you too . More handsome than gus Pati according to umi, Try to go down to see it , you must like !"Umi still eagerly persuaded me to come down .Speaking of handsome, I've never seen a man as handsome as Gus Pati in this country .I have never felt a beat when I looked at the beauty of God other than him.

"Say the Breath is not interested!" I said still strong .On the bed, I hugged my knees while my gaze had shifted, staring at the leaves that were swaying outside the window.

"This time Naf, not good or umi same Abah .There's a May's ustadzah too, a period of not wanting to find out .He later said it was not polite!"Umi voiced her heart, and I grimaced .Found a throbbing pain in the soles of my feet.

"His name is Fikhar Nafis, Fikhar Romanika ! She begged Abah to meet you .He said he won't be home until you give him an answer !"And now I understand, where does this coercion come from .

"You also owe the same explanation Ustadzah May, right ?" Umi said then with a voice almost giving up."May's Ustdzah is also downstairs, and the man claims to be her niece!"

I was stunned, regaining the pain that filled the recesses of my soul.Hearing his name Ustadzah May, for whatever reason was enough to restore that memory. My tears welled up, then spilled unstoppable. I'm intrigued, I feel this is very painful.

"Why are you, honey? Don't want to meet ?Yes, no need to go out, let me say you are not feeling well!"Umi yakangkabut with a panicked voice.

I still sobbed at the rest of my pain . I hate myself like this, but destruction often waves and ruins all the bastions of faith.

"So, what should I say to the man's family so they understand?Demand it again ,It's like confusion .He squeezed my palm and looked at me with a gaze asking for understanding .

"Umi same Abah may not tell her to return later.Nafis, kalo umi may beg to come down, say yes if you accept it or not.Only that's , after that you can go straight back here !Please ask very . The sadness was clearly implied in his gaze, and I fully understood that his daughter he had not found here.

her request was so simple not , but I don't think it would be that simple for me to do it . I'm always scared, fear of the past is also afraid in the future.

My hand held back his steps that were about to leave .I simply say 'yes or no' ,as simple as that .I have to do it .

"Wait for umi, Let's have Breath !"I said sure, then slowly down while holding him to hold my body that felt weak. Umi seemed to sigh in relief then smiled "It's okay, everything will be fine!"

Hopefully so ...Hopefully everything will be fine and always fine.

***

I fell silent, feeling my world stop for a while .My heart aches, when I see the girl last month I slept with is now thinner.Holder eyes are so clear blackened, framing her deep sadness.

My eyes are already glazed over, staring at the Breath that is currently still sheltering behind his mother's body. Like fear, sadness, depression, and what other words deserve to describe her situation, but I dare to admit that her life is now very ruined .

My gaze fell on the clenched hand that was currently clenched was also trembling .His white books stand out, indicating that his grip is very strong. Guilt invaded, filled in between the recesses of my soul, I know .The cause of his destruction was me.

If I could, I wanted to pull and hug the girl in that oversized shirt, whispering a word that would calm her down. While my eyes were already wet, it was not enough heart to see the painful thing when looking at the face of the woman who had lately diverted my world all.

Lucky her was, when Nafisah's mother left earlier.kyai Hasyim recounted her daughter's current state .So, my family present was not so surprised to see the present Nafisah, although the expression of disbelief was still clearly read on their faces.

When I heard the story of Kyai Hashim , my heart crumbled dimly , a force of restraint to listen to the words that slowly destroyed .

"Naphysic Ustadzah!" Call bi May who's known her long enough.

slowly Nafisah's face lifted, she looked around with an indecipherable expression .But I realized one thing that my heart was beating rhythmically as soon as a pair of neutrals looked at me with wounds.

Degs..

He froze, his lips shaking with his face growing pias..

y-you..

***

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