Aster Veren
Episode 149's

- Esther

After giving the last greeting to Mother by placing a white Lily flower on her tombstone. I immediately went to look for Carel who was already invisible to his nose. Everyone began to leave the tomb one by one after chanting his condolences to master Ian and his grandfather Carel.

I really want to comfort her now, I want to hug her like when she comforted me first, when I was sad about the passing of Marta's grandmother. I also wanted to apologize to her for all my annoying treatment, I said in my heart before stopping my steps when I saw Lusy hugging Carel's body so tightly.

"Ah, I forgot ... Even if there is no me, Carel still has Lusy who can comfort him right?" I muttered with my breath hunting for Carel.

I don't know, my heart's like it's being hit really hard right now. It hurts to see their closeness. Carel didn't like that woman very much, but what do I see now? He was hugged by Lusy.

Am I selfish if I expect their relationship to end? My mind immediately shook its head quickly as it remembered my entire treatment of Carel. I really don't deserve to be jealous of Lusy when I offended Carel by saying something bad to her.

"Don't be stubborn! I'm so busy right now, take care of your own business."

"But I want to see you."

"I don't care, she's your mother anyway. You can say I'm busy with your mom, right? He will understand too!"

I quickly shook my head, trying to shake off those bad memories. "I'm a real bitch! You idiot! There's no feeling! No brain!" My gertutuku cursing myself.

"Ap–what did Carel tell Mom about our quarrel? Did he say what I told him? If so, I haven't even apologized to Mom for that ...," I continued recalling my last meeting with Mom at the hospital.

I should be the one apologizing to Mom, right? Not Mother.

I looked at the back of Carel who was still in Lusy's arms, looking very fragile.

"You okay?" Dwi's voice surprised me, I quickly wiped away the tears that had flooded my face.

"Sister Dwi–"

"It's okay, cry Aster." The cut made me cry again.

"I ... Mom, I mean Miss Alterio, that's hiks ...."

"You must be very surprised, right?" He immediately grabbed my body into his arms. Though I'm sure Kak Dwi also felt very sad about the passing of his mother, but he? He was comforting me, but I should have comforted him, right?

***

"Then I'll go now." I said to Brother Dwi who stood before me.

"Eh? You wanna go home already? We just arrived at Alterio's residence, aren't you willing to enter first? Meet with Carel?" Her question makes me shake my head.

"I ... won't take Lusy's position. I have to stay away from Carel anyway, right?" Obviously I'm looking for excuses, trying to show my best smile.

How could I face him after what I told him? I really didn't have the courage to meet Carel face to face. I don't have the face to meet him.

"... right. Then be careful on the road. Greetings to your father too."

"Yes, I'll tell you. See you later." I said before I went to see Uncle Hans who was waiting for me in the car.

"You're leaving already?" Teo's voice made me look up and stop my steps when I cross paths with him. I saw him coming with Kalea.

"Yes–sof ...,"

"Don't you have to comfort that shitty kid before you go?"

"Really! You have to cheer up Carel Aster." Kalea agreed with her lover's words.

"That's not necessary," I replied after sighing heavily.

"Why?" Tanya Teo and Kalea together.

"Because someone's been comforting her." My reply returned with my best smile that I forced a little, I saw Teo and Kalea throwing confused gazes at each other making me reflexively point towards Carel and Lusy who were sitting on the park bench next to his house.

"I'll excuse you then, until we meet again Teo, Kalea." Then I put my feet back together.

"Eh–but, wait! Aster!" Shouted Kalea I don't care.

***

"You're such a mess, aren't you Carel?" Teo's voice made me glance briefly towards his arrival.

"Itu–"

"I'm not okay, I just lost my mom. Besides, which kid could be okay with losing his mom?" I obviously cut Kalea's words.

"Looks like you're a little better off hearing from your annoying answer." Teo said after grunting made me glare.

"You want to get me into a fight, right?"

"No way." Kill it with its distinctive wall face.

"Even fight you won't win, look at you now. Weak as a tree branch, how many days have you not eaten regularly?" He continued to mock, irritating me when he heard that remark.

This kid is really shitty. Already know I'm grieving, why even look for a storm?

Ah, my mood is not improving one bit ... Mom, don't you feel any pain now? Did you meet old grandma up there? Me, missing you. I haven't had one day to leave, but it feels like I haven't seen Mom in so long.

I went to the academy to become a doctor and heal Mom, but now I'm gone without giving me a chance to try to cure you.

... In that case, did I just give up on becoming a doctor?

"You're not thinking about giving up on your dreams, are you?" Teo asked surprised me with a clap of his hand on my shoulder, even his words were completely on target. Can he read other people's minds?

"Eh? Be–re you really thinking about that?" Lusy continued who did not know since when he sat next to me. I didn't even notice. Am I daydreaming all day?

"Where's Aster?" I asked then, as I remembered I was with him. She kept hugging me and calming me down, but where did she go now?

"What?" Lusy's words looking so surprised made me slightly flinch and frown confused by the expression he showed.

"You didn't meet him?" Kalea asked me seriously.

"Where possible, the whole day she kept with me. Aster even calmed me down at the funeral." Obviously I tried to recall Aster's figure at the funeral. It looks blurry in my memory.

"Anu Carel .. You've been with me all day. We also have not met Aster since the funeral even until this secondpun–"

"No! Obviously I'm with him not you!" My daughter did not accept with her words, how could she claim to be Aster who continued with me all day?

"No Carel, you–"

"The boy did not lie. You've been with him all day." Said Dwi suddenly joining me and the others.

"No way!" I tried to recall the face of the woman I believed was Aster.

"You must have been so shocked by your mother's passing that you didn't notice the people around you." Kalea further confused me.

"Where's Aster now?" I stared at their beads one by one.

"Dia–" Teo said cut by Dwi.

"Not come."

"What?" I said along with Kalea, "are you kidding?" I continue to feel lied to.

"No. She did not come ...," he muttered with a deeply disturbing look, "if you can't believe you can contact the Veren residence now. Then they'll answer your call and tell you that Aster is on his way to Singapore for a vacation." The next one pisses me off. I don't know why I think he's lying to me.

And again, why did Aster leave without saying anything to me? If ... if Lusy's words are true, I'm with him all day. Then why didn't Aster see me? My mind wonders like a fool. Then I quickly left them all for my room. I plan to contact Aster.

"Wait Carel!" Shouted Lusy I don't care.

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Thanks for reading...