Aster Veren
Episode 47's

- Esther

After I got home from school, I didn't talk to my dad much. Father also looked glum after seeing Kalea go along with uncle Victor.

Today I can only confine myself in the library with the books I have frowned upon.

I miss my dad very much and want to hug him. But this afternoon Kalea hugged papa ahead of me .... My mind sighed tired.

"Here you look!" Carel's voice surprised me.

I quickly looked at her who was standing next to me.

"What's wrong with you?" He asked while shaking his waist with a focused look at the several books that were splattered in front of me.

"You sick? Usually you're very serious about reading books, but why now ignore the books in front of you?" He continued asking while grabbing my forehead.

Seeing her worry about me like this even made me want to cry. Though I deliberately hid in the library so that I could cry secretly, but had not had time to cry already caught first with Carel.

"Not hot." His murmur made me unable to hold back my feelings of sadness anymore, I quickly hugged him very tightly.

"Carel ... hiks," I immediately sobbed in his arms.

"A–ada what? why are you crying like this?" The question sounds confused.

"I ... I–hiks, hwaaa...." My answer could not explain anything to him, it felt like my heart was too sick to think about the relationship between father and Kalea.

I know they lived together before I came into my life, and I also know that you still love Kalea so much, bigger than how I feel. But I can what? What I feel for Kalea is getting bigger, isn't that bad?

"Hey calm down, explain a little bit. I wouldn't understand if you suddenly cried like this." Carel said as he patted my back slowly.

"Are you being bullied again at school?" It made me look up to the red bead.

"How do you know I've been colonized?" I asked while sobbing.

"Eh–it ...." His answer immediately threw his gaze away from me.

"Ah, must be Teo telling you?" My murmur again buried my face in Carel's stomach, because he had only been standing next to me sitting in the chair.

"Iya–Teo, he told me." His words justify my words.

"... not hyks, I'm not being colonized by my friends anymore. I just ... Just let me be like this for a second." I obviously don't want to explain anything to him.

"Alright, calm yourself first." He patted my back slowly before finally stroking my head repeatedly.

Mother ... is it okay for me to be a selfish child this time? I've wanted a father figure for a long time, and now I have one. But dad .. It seems like he doesn't love me completely yet.

"Ugh," I murmured in my chest.

"What's wrong?" Carel's question sounded panicked and immediately released my embrace from her.

"Se–sak!" I try to catch my breath as best I can.

How long have I not felt shortness of breath like this? Is my shortness of breath always this painful? I continue in my heart.

"Te–take it easy, try to set your breath slowly. Breathe in slowly and slowly out of your mouth ...." He immediately knelt with one of his knees before me who was still sitting in the chair.

Carel ... she's really very funny when she's worried about me. Her expression was completely indescribable to me, but she was really worried about me.

"How's it?" He asked after I managed to catch my breath according to his instructions.

"Huft, thank goodness." He muttered while sighing in relief with his left hand that instantly stroked his chest.

"Thank you Carel." My words made him look me in the eyes.

"... Don't cry like Aster. I don't want to see you in pain like that anymore." He said with a faint smile with the look of his own eyes, for the first time I could see Carel's side like that. He always acts annoying and always irritates me.

"I'm definitely gonna miss you." I said as I remembered I had to go with my father in a few days.

"Me too," he muttered making me return his gaze after having time to throw my gaze away from him.

"Actually I missed my mother when I saw my moody papa for parting with Kalea at school. I also felt that papa could not love me as much as he loved Kalea, so I felt both sad and envious of Kalea. I think I'm the only one who's happy to meet papa, I don't think you want me ...." Obviously I was at length while shedding my tears again.

"Aster, trust me. Uncle Ansel loves you more than you know." Carel said in his soft voice.

"But papa–" My words were immediately stopped by him who suddenly stood up from his kneeling position.

"Maybe your father still loves Kalea, but he loves you too. He wouldn't have taken you to Singapore if he didn't love you. Didn't he ask you to prove that he loves you? Doesn't that mean she wants to live with you? Just with you." Obviously, the length makes me not able to wiggle at all.

"I don't know, what I saw Papa loved Kalea very much." I mumbled back to wipe my tears.

***

"Let's go to sleep, today let grandma tell me about your father." Grandma said as she lay beside me and covered me with her thick blanket.

Tonight I slept with my grandmother like yesterday, after finishing dinner Carel went straight home with uncle Tomi and I went to bed with grandma.

Daddy's? She didn't even come home after picking me up from school and driving me home to grandma's.

"You know? Your father was often colonized by your uncle because he was always busy studying in the library. Once your uncle locked the library and made your father unable to study, he even got rid of all your father's books from his room. Then you know what happened?" My grandmother told me the story of my father and uncle when they were kids.

"What?" I asked while looking up to see Grandma's expression, and grandma immediately smiled amusedly before continuing her story.

"Of course your father was angry, but he immediately cried because he could not learn. Your uncle who saw his brother crying immediately panicked and ran to find grandma, it seems he forgot that he only needed to give his brother the keys to the library, but he didn't." Obviously grandma before chuckling.

"Why is dad crying?" I wonder, isn't anger more appropriate than crying?

"Because your father loved to learn, rather than get angry it was not clear he would prefer to cry so that his sister stopped working on him. You tau? Ever since seeing your father cry, your uncle has stopped pranking his brother. And at that time grandma so can not distinguish between those who are her brother." Grandma explained while hugging my body.

"Then one day your father was hurt by falling from a tree and crying and even your uncle." I can't imagine what my father and uncle were like when they were kids.

"But then your uncle forced his brother to go out of the library every once in a while, then he taught him how to climb trees and other things that your father couldn't. And when your father climbed up a tree, he suddenly fell down and shocked his sister." Grandma was still telling me about dad and uncle while I was busy listening.

"Then Arsel was determined to never bother his sister again, and you know? Actually that prankster is not your uncle, but your father."

"Why is that?" I ask I don't understand at all.

"Because from the beginning Ansel cried to tease his frantic sister, then when she fell on the tree, she made her sister panic again and cry. Of course Ansel accidentally fell from a tree .. they're really funny huh." Grandma chuckled again.

My papa is really ignorant, isn't he? My mind chuckled along with my grandmother.

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Thanks for reading...