Lecturer Idiot
99. Restless (SEASON 2 EPS. 17)

"A long before I met and established a relationship with Ara now, I first knew Him. We even met and talked together. If you can say, love first sight I and the only girl who is new first time I like is Ara. At that time, I never saw Ara again. I even changed my heart with Princess. But the same Princess I didn't do anything at all. When I ran to Japan, I also did not admit to the same thing Meygumi. Although He often makes things worse, I don't really. I just don't like it and I don't. I can't be forced." Obviously me. It seems I've been too open to Dicky.

"Yes, I understand. Although I'm not as handsome as Loe, but I also picky times.. I don't want to be the same girl who isn't clear. Like a paid girl or something." Honest Dicky. I was a little surprised when he said he wasn't as handsome as me.

"Finally Loe admitted that I'm more handsome than Loe." GR me.

"Pltaic.." He hit my shoulder. I just laughed a little at his misbehavior.

"No need to GR! I'm not saying I'm not handsome, I'm just saying `even though I'm not as handsome as Loe', it doesn't mean I'm not handsome. Not that Loe is prettier than I am." Dicky is still in love. I smiled briefly at him.

"Udahlah skip, I'm tired. Oh yeah later tonight nginep at home I'll help you input value." Say I'm done. Dicky scrunched his forehead.

"Kok I'm gonna go get the guy?" Dicky was trying to argue with me, but I was just glaring at him. He immediately changed his attitude and immediately lowered his head like a frightened person.

"Yes yes! Have lots of food." That sounds like giving up. Again, I'm addicted to asking Dicky for help. But even like that, Dicky was also constantly giving me his help. Poor him..

"Drrtt.t.." My phone is shaking. There are some notifications from my chat app. I saw who sent me the message. I was silent for a moment because the one who sent the message was Ara. I glanced at Dicky who was also watching me.

"Who? That girl, huh?" He made sure, but I just nodded at him.

"How should I go?" I asked him who was confused about what to do.

"What message did he send?" Dicky asked in a tone that sounded a little curious.

"He asked where I was again." Answer me.

"Yes, that's it, right? No need to answer, let him think and feel lost. Try for the next week you guys no contact first. We'll see what the response looks like." Her speech. I doubt that advice a little. I just kept quiet and pondered what I should do after this.

"But with Him asking like that as well, does He not feel lost and feel a sense of longing in his heart?" Refute me. Dicky looked at me flatly. I realized that my love was greater than my hatred for Ara. I can't do this and I can't make him wonder about my situation. I can't hang people up by being made up.

"As far as Loe wants to. I've been telling you that Loe has to give her feelings first at this time. Loe can not pull the feeling of Him. There will be even Loe who became pulled along with Him and the situation turned upside down. It is easy for Women to attract the outspoken Male.it is because we who already care so much about Him until His mistakes we always leave aside for the sake of the relationship." Obviously at length. I still reflect on his words this time. It's true, all this time I've been chasing him and I've always given up on Ara. I want to see once He did that to me. How does it feel to be fought?

*

-ARA.

It's been this late, Brother hasn't come home yet. Where's Brother? He's not usually like this. The phone could not be reached, the Assistant and Manager were not available to contact. I became even more worried, plus Morgan who since noon did not reply to my short message. I don't know what's going on with them out there. Are they together now?

"duh.. Brother same Morgan why can not be connected anyway? Why did they become on this kind of artisan?" Ogre me. Upset, anxious, anxious, worried, it feels like everything is getting mixed up right now. I paced back and forth uncharacteristically in the courtyard of the house. Finally, I decided to sit in the courtyard while waiting for Brother.

"Where not sprained, mobile phone is not activated. No news at all!" My grouse. I bent my face like unscrubbed clothes. Suddenly I remembered my dream of Reza. I became mellow. Did I miss him or couldn't I change my heart?

"Reza's.. How are you doing?" I suddenly remembered a piece of my story with him. In retrospect, on his birthday at that time, I just left without hearing his explanation. So, I don't know what the truth is.

"Ah.. What else to explain? Everything I saw back then proved Him wrong! I don't have to be gentle like this." My edge on the mind that is constantly softening. For such treason, there was already nothing more to talk about, let alone consider.

I immediately saw Reza's social media account. I'm looking for his id. Will I be strong after seeing the porch of his sosmed?

"Living clicked." I am the one who is trying to strengthen my heart. I just want to know Reza's situation right now. Is He okay without me? Or just the opposite?

"Ah, but if I squirm it turns out He was all right and even happy with the girl at that time, how?" I'm reconsidering stalking Reza. I'm not ready to accept the fact that Reza is okay without me. But, I want to know about her.

"A little bit, no papa time?" I tried to convince my heart back. Finally, I looked at the contents of the profile from his sosmed. There are only a few photos in the room. In fact, he used to love photography and even told me to be his model. Turns out, he's deleted all my photos, and all our memories. Yeah, it's not weird! We have long since ended our relationship with each other. There's nothing to remember anymore. Maybe, I'm the one who suddenly still misses him.

I started looking at the photos on her account. I saw it from the beginning. Seen Reza's graduation photo. He was wearing a black suit with a white shirt and a neat tie. At that time, we had no relationship anymore. Because of the tragedy on his birthday that I still remember clearly.

"Gue wasn't even photographed with him at the time.." I'm holding back my upset feelings. I'm replacing on the next slide photo. He was at the airport carrying his suitcase. I was surprised to see this photo. It turns out that all this time, Reza was not in Indonesia?

"Goodbye Indonesia." Caption that made me very surprised. Why did he leave Indonesia? Is it because of her wishes, or because of the coercion of her family?

"It turns out all this time, Loe is not in Indonesia." It was me who felt a bit sad when I found out. Why am I even sad? It's good, so I don't have to cross paths with him anymore.

Next slide, I saw a picture of him playing basketball. Has he changed his hobby? All this time I've never even seen Reza play basketball.

"He's a total cheat! Why is it still the same I, He never played basketball. But after I broke up, he started playing basketball." I felt annoyed with him.

"But what else am I doing with Loe? You're fine without me there. Why do I have to sprain with Loe?" My feeling is so weird! Sometimes sprains, sometimes sad and sometimes missed.

"Reza is my first ex. You could say, He was my first love, and I couldn't forget Him that fast. Although I already have Morgan, but still at certain times, I sometimes miss the same memories with Him." Ogre me. I speak for myself because no one can listen to me right now. I feel like my life is empty! Whether Reza or Morgan, those two are now not on my side. Not even my brother. So who do I have to put out all my heartache with?

I looked back at Reza's social media slides. I saw a picture of him at the airport. When I saw when He was uploading, He just uploaded a new post. I'm surprised I'm not playing.

"Wait for me there." The caption is a bit ambiguous, but it looks like he will make a trip. Did I dare to send her a short message?

"Ah later I was thought not to be able to move on again! What if I get cut off with Him? I'm wrong why at that time I suddenly left Him alone and did not want to hear first an explanation from Him? I'm going to be sprained myself." My heart was constantly worried, not knowing what to do. I was too consumed by my prestige. I don't want Him to think anything about Me leaving him first. But I didn't leave it because of my wishes! But it was because of her fault that it upset me that I had done the wrong thing to do with that woman.

"I'll remember it even more!" I pouted while squeezing my hair hard. I can no longer resist all these lies. Turns out, my ability to hold him back only got here. Just because of that vague dream of mine, it was even able to get me stuck back in my dark past together with Reza.

"Gue's not gonna cheat Loe!" Snapped me while looking at Reza's photo. I closed my phone screen because I didn't want to see that person anymore.

"Drriiinnggg..." I looked back at my phone screen to see who was calling. It's called "Bii" with an emoticon love there. Turns out I still haven't changed the name of Bisma on my phone. I stared at my phone screen in wonder while frowning my forehead.

"Bisma? The tumben? Why'd He call me gini nights?" I'm surprised. I deliberately took a long time to pick up the phone from Bhishma because I did not want to be considered a woman who quickly responded to her ex-boyfriend, even though I already had a boyfriend. What will other people think?

"Tuttgart.."

"Hello, Ra?" He greets. I have not heard the voice of bisma for a long time. His voice was getting more and more changed, unlike the voice of the old Bhishma.

"Yes hello, bus. How are you?" Ask him a pleasantry.

"good. Exceptionally well. Loe how's it going?" Ask. Suddenly my heart was racing. Why am I so weak when dealing with men?

"Yes that's it. What's up, Bis? Tumben Loe call me night-night gini? I slept knowing." Say me in a flat tone.

"Oh sorry I interrupted your sleep." He sounded like a person feeling guilty.

"It's not papa, bus."

"Let's go." There was the sound of the voice of the person who had just approached Bhishma. I am no stranger to that voice.

"Yes a minute." Lirih Bisma answered her friend's words earlier.

"Ra, I just want to tell you that I'm now on the way to Jakarta. Hopefully, we can meet when I've been there.."

"Deg.."

Did I not hear wrong? Bhishma is on her way to Indonesia? No wonder, at this time my campus has also started to take a vacation because it has done the final exam last semester. Maybe that happened on his campus, too. Moreover, the distance after taking the exam with the new school year next semester is quite long, about 2 months. It is only natural that Bisma wants to visit her family in Indonesia. But why would he want to meet me? So, what do I have to answer?

"But I don't understand that Loe doesn't want to. It's my hope to meet Loe, Ra." Reciprocity. I don't even know what to answer.

"Come on, you're going to walk." The voice of the person next to Bhishma was heard again. Looks like his friend is starting to fret, worried about missing the plane.

"Yes okay." Answer the bisma that sounds like it is tidying up something.

"okay, Ra. Continue to sleep. I want to walk first. Have a nice dream, Ra. Wait I'm there."

"Deg.."

@sarjiputwinataaa