Lecturer Idiot
Goodbye, Bisma

My life right now, has become very empty. Several times I passed by or saw Morgan talking to other lecturers, or even talking to some female students.

I'm a little sad.

I don't know what makes me sad. In fact, I'm nobody here.

I walked down the lake near the campus, which I was visiting at the time, when I was sad. There's no one here. I tried to calm myself down, because the current me, was already at my lowest point.

It seems, my heart is very lonely. Can't do anything anymore.

“Huft...”

I sighed deeply, as I felt tired of this life. Can no one give me a shoulder to lean on?

I was sitting by the lake, trying to calm myself down here. I want to let go of the life about Morgan. Why do I feel so sad when Morgan walks away from me like this?

In fact, I do not want to be close to him, and constantly avoid him, because it feels very disturbed by his existence.

Have I started to regret losing Morgan?

She's gone, along with my honor.

I accidentally saw him alone, across the street. I looked at her with a sad look, because I could no longer reach her. It seemed that he was engrossed in looking at the little fish that was leaping a little, making me reflect.

“Why everywhere should there be loe, anyway?” shirihku.

I squeezed my hair softly, feeling a sudden headache.

“If you finally go as far as I gini, continue to why initially loe deketin me with great difficulty?”

I moved to sit on the edge of the lake bridge which still looks simple, because it uses a wooden bridge board. That's just a little bit too. I looked at myself in the reflection of the lake water, as if I was the earth creature that suffered the most.

Am I feeling a broken heart?

What does this feel like?

“Oh yes, this is the same place we met at that time. No wonder he's here. After all, he knew this place earlier than me, who was this new student.” softly me again, while still looking at my shadow.

Why is life always mellow for me?

I took a deep breath, trying to hold back the tears that forced out of my eyes.

“Why the hell, Morgan so?” Tears began to pour from the eye pelukur, then freefall, and mixed with the murky lake water.

Instantly ringing all the promises Morgan ever made to me. Why do I feel like I have lost her figure? Why did it turn around, be the one who wanted it?

Uh.

“Morgan.. he promised to keep me.” I cried a sigh, because I could no longer hold back my feelings.

The scratches of this wound were already too sore, making me give up on this situation.

“Why is it like this, anyway?” I cried alone by the lake.

I got carried away in my own mood.

I.. galau.

“Duaaaarrrrr.

There was a sound of lightning striking hard. Is it now entering the rainy season? It's always like this, when I'm mellow.

“Srakkk.

The rain suddenly fell, soaking all over my body. My rain and tears were mixed into one. I'm starting to lose my mind.

There are other shadows on the surface of the lake water, which is not clear because it is exposed to raindrops.

I woke up, and immediately stopped my crying. I looked straight at him.

My gut says. Morgan.

“Mor-” Pekikku who was cut off, because of shock when he saw next to me, not Morgan who was there.

“Gan,” connect me very softly.

I'll make sure he doesn't hear my last words.

“Ra...” Calling lirih.

Without my consent, he immediately approached and sat down next to me.

I lowered my head, not letting him know I was crying. It was fortunate that it was raining, because my tears were mixed with rainwater, which he was likely unaware of.

I stared straight at him.

“Nothing, Bus. I want to do it myself,” I replied to Bhishma.

He seemed to breathe and think of something.

“It's raining, Ra. Should we take shelter?” bargain Bisma.

“Gak, Bus. I again want to enjoy the rain,” reject me, he looks silent for a moment while looking down.

He looks back at me.

“How are you doing, Ra?” tanyakanya.

I just looked down, didn't respond to anything.

I can't keep going like this. I have to affirm it with my feelings that I am experiencing right now.

I looked towards him.

A sad look from his eyes. The rain that was constantly falling, made me unable to distinguish between tears and rain. Because I'm sure, Bhishma is shedding her tears, right now.

“Gue...” said I hesitate, “well,” connect me.

It might not matter if I had a little conversation with Bhishma. I already knew the evil intentions of Bhishma back then, from Morgan's story. He explained the details again, by sending a long chat about the incident at that time, before I could stretch with him now. Since then, I have been worried.

“Good if good,” he said.

Silent.

That's all that's happening right now.

I don't know what else to say. Maybe I just need to answer what he's asking.

“Gue is here, just to say sorry, Ra,”.

I just nodded, not knowing what else to say.

“Gue wants to say, if... I want to move to America,” he said suddenly, making me suddenly relieved.

Maybe after this, there's nothing else I need to worry about.

“Gue has promised the lecturer, do not disturb you again. It just so happened that I went there for business. Maybe, I also continue to study there,” he explained at length.

I just kept quiet while listening to his explanation. There was a feeling of shock after hearing the explanation from him.

Shocked? That's certain.

But, I'm ready to release Bhishma. Whatever happens, I'm sincere.

I took a breath, to prepare myself.

“But, there is one last request I have to loe, Ra,” he said, making me curious.

I narrowed my eyes at him.

“What, Bis?” my many.

He looks like he's breathing. I hope, not a request I cannot fulfill.

“Gue... can hug kiss for the last time, no?” her door.

I feel full. I may not have the heart to release Bhishma, because of this word. Why am I so easily touched by every word of a man?

I suck.

“Hah?” it's a shock that I don't believe what I'm hearing.

“Just a minute..”.

I thought for a moment. Can it be like this?

He was about to harm me, trying to take my honor. I may never forgive him.

But the truth is, he will soon leave this place. Not just moving, but moving countries. Am I going to let him go in that curious dawning?