NOT A SUBSTITUTE LOVE
Before the Operation

Vyas, vyas, continue to blame himself for what happened to his son and he felt less attention so that his son was sick alone did not know when they were level one house so far only one year ago they stayed separated and this month lived together again but there was no suspicious sight of Farah.

"Mommy's not a failed mother, don't blame yourself like that," Dean of course did not want his wife to blame herself because she also helped hide what was experienced by his son because he already knew it would be like this would be the case.

Blaming himself and feeling less attention to his son when all that is not true because Farah herself also helped to keep the condition of his illness and ended up unconscious this morning.

"But a sick child I don't know pap," the woman with two children still blames herself for not caring about her child.

As Dean's husband patiently calmed his wife down then after feeling calm he said goodbye to his wife to take care of all the procedures to perform the operation.

"Thank you, sir," Dean finished taking care of everything and walked into the doctor's office.

"Excuse me doctor" Dean sat in front of the man in the suit.

"If you can find out who donated a kidney to my child?" Dean was curious who the person who donated the kidney to his child because to this day with no idea and also no doctors mention Who the person is.

"Sorry sir for that the patient asked to keep the data a secret," of course the doctor kept the data of who donated the kidney to Farah let alone the person had ordered.

It is impossible for him to tell even if he asks the parents concerned because a doctor's appointment should not be broken just like that.

"But I want to know doc," Dean of course did not want to give up because he wanted to know who that person was and wanted to thank him directly for helping his son's life.

"Sorry again sir, if I tell you, the patient will not be donating his kidneys," Dean sighed deeply and was released slowly if it was like this he could not force it because he did not want to endanger his son's life.

Because it is not possible for him to find other donors just to find out who has been kind enough to listen to his kidneys to his son.

"All right, doc, thank you," Dean walked out of the doctor's office and headed to where his wife was, let alone the operation in the next few hours.

"How's pa?" The beautiful face was already because he kept crying and blamed himself.

"Everything is ready, waiting for the time of surgery," gently grasped the hand of the woman who has accompanied her days more than 20 years.

The woman he was chasing and a little forced to accept his love even had a little drama when they were in Japan which made this man's body freeze due to sleeping on the balcony very cold room.

That's where their relationship began until now.

But there was nothing conspicuous at all let alone the age difference of those 5 years older his wife.

"Who are the good people who have helped our children?" Vya would be curious as well who has donated a kidney to her child because the person only donated a kidney without asking for any reward at all so she was increasingly curious who the good person was.

"Doctors do not want to tell because if we force the person not to donate his kidney so we better save the curiosity for the safety of our children," though she was as curious as her husband but the donor did not want to tell her identity to the family she donated her kidneys to.

"I want to call Arka first," Dean wants to contact Arka who is a friend as well as the magnitude of it however their relationship is getting closer since the time they were small until now.

Drt,, uh,,,

Drt,, uh,,,

Drt,, uh,,,

"Hello assalamu'alaik,"

"Wa'alaikumsalam, I just want to tell you that Farah today wants surgery because this morning was unconscious,"

"Alright, lo Sharelock,"

After the phone connection was cut Dean immediately sent the address of the hospital where his son was treated however Farah Arka's daughter-in-law and Arka had considered the children like his own.

"Why not call bang Raka?" Although Vya knows how the relationship of his son and daughter-in-law but he still wants to tell Raka about what happened to his wife because until now their relationship is still husband and wife.

"Papa call first" Dean tries to call his daughter-in-law's number but only the operator answers.

It is not unusual for his daughter-in-law to be like this even though she is in a meeting, but rarely if the number is out of reach.

"Try to contact an office person aja pa," they do not run out of sense especially in office hours like this then can still find the whereabouts of his son-in-law through office people.

Drt,, uh,,,

"Can I talk to Mr Raka?" Although Dean had worked there and was an important person also before but he did not forget the courtesy and office rules that have been listed since long ago.

Dean briefly heard the remarks from the office man and then the phone connection was closed.

"Bang Raka wasn't in the office or rather there was a business trip out of town three days ago," at least they had tried to contact his daughter-in-law even though he was not in the office but Dean had left a message to be conveyed to Raka if he came to the office later.

"Maybe bang Raka is busy, later we try to call again," not long later Arka came with his wife of course the couple was anxious because they did not expect Farah's condition to be like this.

"When will the operation be performed?" Arka sat next to her best friend as well as the wife who had been friends since long before they even married their respective partners.

"The doctor said he'll have surgery,"

"Then who donated the kidney to Farah?" Dean only shook his head because he also did not know who that person was.

"Do you want me to help you find out?" Because it is not difficult for Arka to know who the person who has donated the kidney to Farah.

"No need, the person has advised not to divulge data about him because if it happens he does not become a kidney," if this is the case Arka also can not force because he does not want to endanger the life of his daughter-in-law even though he can do secretly but the health of his daughter-in-law is more important.

"Sooner or later we will know too," then the four of them got up from their seats to enter Farah's treatment room because the doctor had moved him and could also be visited.

"Where's sick son?" Vya, trying to be strong in front of her weakly lying child with an infusion needle stuck in her hand.

"I'm fine, sorry to make you sad," Farah felt guilty for hiding her illness but she did so so as not to make her parents sad but what she feared happened was also seeing the face of the woman who had given birth and raised her sad even she I could see the dry tears on that beautiful face.

"Mama is okay, get well soon after surgery. In the future do not play secrets again we play hide and seek," Farah laughed softly to hear the last words of the mother because she did not expect still had time to joke in conditions like this.

"I'm already big ma, playing hide and seek,"

"No matter what, mama still can nyari you who crammed behind the door," Vya used to be invited Farah to play hide and seek when she was a child.

Even almost every day but the mother of two children was never bored or complained tired to please her child.

Happy children do not have to be with luxury things from cheerful children we have also been happy.

"But no longer fit behind the door ma," Farah imitated the words of the mother because it could at least reduce the bit of sadness felt especially ahead of him who will do the operation, of course, hope to worry about the results of the operation later.

Moreover, Farah did not have the support of her husband even contacted it could not only parents and other families who were present.

**Why does Bang Raka not exist? Or do you not care anymore? Is it now Raka's turn to hate me?**

Though Farah really hopes that Raka's presence is there and gives spirit to him but that hope is only hope.

After several hours passed and he was ready to be taken to the operating room Raka showed no signs of his arrival to the hospital.

Until the bed that was slept by Farah was pushed out and down the hallway to the operating room to enter the room and the door was closed tightly Raka did not come and Farah could only hope that the operation went smoothly.

**Bismil was bornrahmanirrahim, hopefully the operation went well and I can arrange life again**

Although Raka is not there but at least Farah gets support from her family and in-laws so she should not be sad so that everyone does not worry about her condition.

He must not be weak and must recover soon because the journey is still long and solve the problems of his household that has not been clarified until now.

Farah is not a weak girl who remains resigned to fate and conditions without wanting to fight at all because after she recovered from this disease then all the problems that have happened before will be solved and he will improve his life and not want to live fixed on past events to make it difficult for him to achieve happiness in the future.