Falling Into Your Trap
Apology and Guilt; Fear 1/1

”See what you've done with Hexa! Look what you destroyed! You really are outrageous hex! You ruined everything!”

Hala hysterical. The woman groaned with tears that kept on gushing out from her two puffy eyes. Violet voice. The pain dripped from every word that was quietly removed from her trembling lips.

Hala had cried a lot before. He often shouted many inappropriate things every time he let out tears and all those emotions that were buried deep in his slashed heart. Hala is the first daughter to take on too much pain. Crying was his most frequent activity, but rather than becoming weak and continuing to wallow in the rubble of adversity, he said, being an adult and trying to look like she was doing well was a coping mechanism that she had built up alone with great difficulty.

But in this condition, Hala was helpless. He was unable to show his sturdy mask anymore. The raw whole thing he showed in real before others. Hala fucked. It was not that his life had never been chaotic before, but here he was, the most violent chaos that had made him falter. The brick walls he had stacked desperately on his own to not reveal how weak he really was -, actually, broken was torn apart by one man held desperately by his heart that was too hard to fall in love.

Stupid love, if he could admit it out loud this time.

”Everything's ruined because of you, Heksa! You really want to see me destroyed, huh? Do you want to ruin my life? Just because I have the same taste, you until like me? I'm so sick of it, Hexa! I'm sick of your selfish behavior! You're not my Hexa! You're not the guy I've known all along. Oath you're so evil, Sa.”

Hala whimpered again. This time his voice was more slashed than the one before.

”Gue apologise. I'm sorry if I ruined everything, Heksa. I'm sorry I made you this way. If I only knew because of my stupid feelings you would be like this, I would kill this feeling as soon as possible, Hexa. I'm sorry” her cries are getting sliced between her words.

Hala no longer knew what to do. Her world seemed to collapse under her feet and she did not know how else to stand on her feet and where she should hold on to at this moment.

”Lo has already succeeded in getting revenge on me. It has made me miserable. With Lisa looking at what you did to me earlier. Everything is broken, Sa. It's ruined! I hurt Lisa. Fuck, I've hurt Bang Sinar. I hurt everyone, Sa! All of them! Why are you so much like me, Sa? Wh why? Why do you have to call me, Hexa. Why do you have to make everything more chaotic?!”

Hala clutched the shirt on her aching chest. His eyes that were blocked on the same Hexah did not wart. But from his vision, Hexa did not feel guilty. He did not look like he was going to apologize to Hala and admit that his actions were very inappropriate.

”Because I need lo, Hala.let's go home to me again. I can't lose you. I've said many times, if I'm damaged because you go from the side of Iu” Hexa rigid in his position. His hand was still trying to pull Hala into the man's embrace.

”Gue told you I can pretend! I can pretend to be what you want, Hala. I don't care if you enslave anywhere, I'm sincere. I'll admit everything as long as we're together again like before. Stayin Bang Sinar, La. Your heart is completely for me. You will only be sick to Bang Sinar if you continue to be on his side and survive the same unclear commitment you” Sound Hexah rising. There was a real coercion stroke inside every word he put out.

Hala. Never would have thought that the Hexa he knew well since childhood could turn into such a terrifying figure like this. It hurts to see Hexa who remains strong to defend the ego and stubbornness that man has.

He could not face this different Hexah. Hala hated how her brain always processed the good side of Hexa, the cheerful side that Hexa always had when they were together. Hala could not remember, where Hexa was once this brutal. Can never put his index finger on any momentum that plays on his head that Hexa, as terrible as her broken family.

”Hex.. lo..”

”Gue does not know, yes, how you can end up having the same commitment Bang Sinar. I also initially do not care if you want to be made or what ’kek is the same anyone, La. That's your life and I won't let you connect with other people. But now when I know the fact that your heart actually makes me, why do you have to hurt other people, La? Same me. You are the same as me. Don't lose me, La. Stop hurting others by giving stupid false hope lo it”

Hala could hear the sound of her heart breaking into pieces. What Heksa said sounded like a thousand daggers stabbing his heart over and over again. Hala could not believe his hearing.

Hala did not know what possessed the man. She's feeling nauseous. It felt like he was riding on a rollercoaster that was circling non-stop.

”Gue didn't expect you to be this crazy, Hexa. From now on, I don't want to squirm my face anymore. I hate it, lo, asshole! I hate you!”

Hala yelling. He couldn't even think of anything that might be a bully to the hotel room residents behind him. He just wanted to roar for everything that was spilling inside his body. His emotions were boiling uncharacteristically.

”How can you hate me if you love me, Hala? stop acting like a child. I want you to go home with me. Hala, you know ’kan if I love you too? I'm so sorry, La, you're the same. I want you to be the same, not the same as the others, huh? I can pretend to be a good boyfriend. Lo quiet aj-”

PLAQUE!!!

Hala's hand trembled violently. His eyes widened in disbelief that he was able to slap Hexa because his ears rejected any malicious comments that the man threw at him.

Hala pulled her hand. Retreated slowly as his eyes caught the look of horror that Hexa had thrown at him. It was mixed with pain and disbelief. Hala has to go. But he panicked and didn't know where to go. Hala just wanted to run away. If he could, he wanted to close his eyes and pretend that he was only dreaming this time.

”Hala..”.

Heksa's voice roused him from the shock and panic that stuck out his steps to run. Hala bit her lips hard.

”Hala.. What I have done.. Hala.. i. sorry.”.

He shook his head strongly. No matter how much his head ached in the shock it was before finally all his senses were able to process the next move he had to make. So, Hala ran. He ran as fast as he could to get out of there. Hala did not care how much Heksa called her in a guilty tone and an apology that seemed to her that the man was fully aware of what he had just done to Hala.

But it's too late. Hala did not want to be near Hexa for now. Hala continued to run in fear. He didn't care that he tripped his leg at some point and almost fell face down to hurt his face first. All Hala needed right now was to disappear from this place as soon as possible.

Just go. go.

Many things overlapped within his head. He was afraid, he was restless, he was unable to think coherently and was not crushed when he met his friends. He could not explain anything about the misunderstanding to Lisa. Also, he was very confident that he would not be able to explain anything to his other friends.

Hala fear. He had never been this scared at all in his life. Of course he used to be afraid that he could not survive when his parents were almost divorced. Of course, he was afraid that he would lose a whole house with both parents and his only sister. Of course he used to be afraid that his father would leave him and let him live with his mother who let him down. Of course he used to be afraid that his sister would suffer massive damage because of what happened to his small family household that was scattered.

Of course Hala was afraid of many things in this world, but his fear now was a fear that was beyond his control. It concerns a lot of people. This concerns the trust of others that is very valuable to him. This concerned himself, who became the main pillar upon which he had to take responsibility for the damage done from his own interference.

And of course, Hala was very scared because he had hurt someone who loved him very much and would be devastated for him. Hala was scared to death because she had betrayed Sinar. It has offended the sincere heart of the one person who has taken it very well under the protection of that person. Hala has destroyed Sinar's trust. Hala had broken the heart of the man who loved her with the great sincerity she had.

Hala wheezed as she tried to take a breath. Behind her blurry eyes, Hala tried to continue fleeing. His eyes trained on the elevator a few steps ahead of him, but his mind that could not think perfectly was telling his body to move open the door through the emergency stairs.

So, Hala used the stairs to get down. He did not know what happened when he stepped swiftly on the small steps that gave rise to the sound of thin metal tinkling resounding that was buzzing in his ears. He feels lost. He didn't know where he was, what floor he was on when he came out of that crowded staircase. Hala just wanted to get out of the building that looks like this labyrinth.

Hala.

That was until finally accidentally, the woman hit someone strongly. They almost toppled over if only the person he hit did not have strong self-defense.

”M-sorry.. g-gue unintentionally” His voice trembled as he retreated to put some distance between them. Hala cursed herself. Just now he felt grateful that there was no one around to see this broken one, but in the end, the woman was caught as well.

”Hala?”

Hala looked up at a speed she never imagined she had. His eyes were swollen and filled with tears wide to catch who he hit in the middle of the night like this. That familiar voice had an equally familiar face. Hala gasp. Of the many people who were in this hotel, why did he have to cross paths with Sinar so quickly?

”K-Snake Ray?”

”Hala, you why?” His voice was full of worry. In fact, behind the blurry view of Hala, the woman could see the panic of the rays aimed at her.

Hala's heart was like it was sliding from its place. He was not ready to meet the light. He was not prepared to apologize from the person he had hurt behind the man.

”Hala? honey, why are you crying? What's the problem?” Panicked voice. Hala could feel Sinar's hand trying to grab her to try to calm Hala down.

”K-sister. I can't. Do not.. do not, Kak” Again, the tears of the woman seeped out like a mini river that had flooded his entire face.

Hala tried to keep the beam off his radar. But it felt really hard when she found herself having a panic attack. Hala had forgotten how long he had not gotten the worst like this. It was like, his body could not follow the orders of his brain that seemed to be malfunctioning and the air around him suddenly disappeared. Hala was sure he was gasping like a sprawling, floundering fish.

”Honey? Love, Hala.. Look at me okay? Focus. Honey, focus on me? Come on, let's breathe baby. Don't make me panic. The vow. Baby.. Let's breathe with me, okay? Breathe in, calm yourself first. Hala.”

Hala could not explain anything about this situation. He only focused on his fear that surrounded his entire being so that he was unable to do anything more. But he could feel a hand trembling against his face. Guided him through all the strange trembling and uncontrollable breathing.

There was water everywhere, it felt like it was pulling him deep into the dark and deep ocean floor. No room to breathe, no place to rest. Hala felt numb. But there was a voice that tried to pull him to stay sober, to stay sane.

The sound of panic Rays pierced through the puddles in his ears. When Hala opened her eyes, it was the face of Sinar who was too close to her, a firm stroke emanated clearly on her frightened face. Hala could not fully hear, but through the movement of her lips, Sinar tried to help Hala take a breath in the right step.

”Ikutin me, yes, darling? Pull. exhale. Come onl. One. pull. two, loose. Slow down, okay? Slow down, Hala... pinter.. again, huh? Calm. You're calm, aren't you? It's okay, there I am. I'm right here, okay, baby? Again. Follow me again. one.”

The voice slowly became clear. Hala closed her eyes to dispel the blur, but Sinar immediately told her to keep her eyes open so that she would not be lulled in the dark. Follow the entire instructions correctly. It took a while for Hala to be able to swim back to the surface. The light guided him patiently and gently, and firmly at the same time. However, the fear emanating from the man was as strong as his self-defense in order to remain calm.

”Hala? is it safe, baby?”

”K-sister.” Hala sobbing. There was a small hiccup when he replied to Sinar's question though in an ambiguous tone.

”You're okay? Are you safe?” The light whispered again. Although the man knew that his body was still shaking violently, but Sinar still tried his best to calm him down.

Hala nodded lightly to answer, not trusting her voice at all. But the light gets that signal. Immediately, Hala was brought into the great embrace of the too-tight Ray.

”Thankful..thankfully dear. I'm so scared. Hala.”

Hala closed her eyes. His lips were still like glue and stuck to each other even though he was still a hiccup. He knew that Sinar was telling the truth when the man's embrace tightened around him. Spiced with a gentle, quivering kiss on the tip of her head, Hala felt the pain in her chest appear again.

This kind of man..Why did Hala hurt his heart?

Why would.. Hala didn't fall in love with Sinar? Why should it be hex? Why should he put his feelings on the wrong person?

Light fast with better. Why should he be with her who could not accept that precious feeling at all?

Hala is not a good person. Why does Ray have to love him?

With so many questions popping up on his head and charging at him abruptly, Hala subconsciously wrapped his hands around the body of Sinar. His fingers tightly curled gripped the thin shirt material that Ray was wearing back then.

The light felt very warm in his grasp at this moment.

Why wasn't the Light chosen by his heart from the beginning?

Hala could not answer the question her heart was asking her. Right now, he would focus on the warmth and aroma of the Light that calmed him down.

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...Apology And Guilt; Fear 1/1...

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