NOT PERPETRATORS
I'm Fragile Absorbency

"Dimas."

Dimas releases Nessa's hand that runs down her arm. Dimas immediately stepped towards me, but Nessa pulled Dimas' arm, holding back her steps. Dimas stopped too. He looked at Nessa for a moment, then looked at me.

I immediately turned my eyes away. Go to the cashier and pay for all my groceries. Fania approached me, and after paying for all the groceries, we immediately met Arka and Rudi in the playground.

"Imania, what's wrong with you?"

"I want to go home."

I hastened the steps to bring Arka and Rudi home.

"Hey!" Fania held my arm. Then face me to him.

"You crying? What's up?"

I wiped my wet face. I tried to hold it, but I couldn't.

"I want to go home."

"But why? What's going on?"

I took Fania's hand off my arm. I'll leave my groceries to Fania. And I'm speeding up the pace.

Coincidentally Arka and Rudi just came out of the playground. We got out of the mall and got into the car.

Rudi who had been watching me seemed to catch something that was happening to me. Any water that kept sliding out of my eyes instantly rubbed. Trying to cover the pain of my heart. But it can't. It's too painful.

He broke his promise to take me for a walk. He said because there's important business. And I believe it. Why am I this stupid? When did my heart get hurt? In fact, it feels so sickening.

Is that as important as Nessa? So Dimas could lie to me. I can't keep going like this. That's enough, Dimas!

"Imania, are you okay?" ask Rudi who is driving his car.

"I'm fine, Rud."

"Close to my rest first, huh?"

"Thank you, Rud. But I'm going home. I'm gonna take a break."

"Oh, okay."

Rudi drove us home. After that, Rudi immediately announced.

***

Eight o'clock at night. Arka's asleep. And Fania was eating a snack on the couch. While I chose to sit on the balcony, breathing fresh air. My heart is still claustrophobic considering what happened at the mall.

Nessa holds Dimas' arm so affectionately. And Dimas lied to me. It's painful.

"Imania, don't you want to try this snack? It's delicious, you know?" fania from the inside.

I didn't answer. I'm still busy neutralizing my heart.

Y'all know? What is more important between loving and having? To me, loving is as hard as having. Because the more I get here, the more I feel unworthy of being with him.

I sat alone on the balcony. I let the night wind blow hard on my body. For my soul to feel cold, among the heat that burns my heart.

Time is getting late. There was no sound of Fania chewing a snack. And suddenly the sound of a car coming into my yard. I soon moved to see who was coming up these nights. From the balcony, I saw the black car.

Dimas. Yeah, it's Dimas. I immediately headed for the room. As I passed the sofa, I saw Fania was already asleep there. Ah, let it be.

In the room, I locked the door. I turned off my room lights. And rushed to sleep. I know why he came. Definitely to apologize. Ah, let. I won't open the door for him.

Ting-tung!

The bells sounded many times. I wrapped my body in a blanket. I'm not gonna talk to him again.

Not so long, however, came the sound of footsteps. What is Fania?

Wh-tok-tok!

My bedroom door was knocked. I'm still thinking about who's coming.

Chequek!

Someone opened the door with a key. I became panicked. What is it ... Dimas. Doesn't he have the keys to this house too?

In the dark, the sound of footsteps came to me. I'm sure, it's Dimas. I'm gonna pretend to be asleep.

Suddenly a hand gently caressed my face. It made me open my eyes. And a soft kiss landed on my lips. I pushed his body.

In the dark, I try to get out of the room. But suddenly my room light was on. And it's true. Dimas was already standing by with his hands touching the light switch.

"Where are you going, honey."

"What else is it here for?" I asked with cold.

Dimas approached me.

"I want to explain your misunderstanding."

"Who misunderstood?"

Dimas grabbed my finger.

"I'm sorry, I lied to you."

"Nia, if you'd known, about what happened to Nessa. Of course you'll understand me. That's the reason why I'm still with him to this day."

I took my hand out of his hand. "Do I always have to understand you?"

"Not much, Nia. I can understand how hard it is to leave Nessa."

"What's making it difficult for you?"

"I can't say it."

"Then leave me!"

"I can't. I could die without you, Nia."

"Isn't there Nessa? You're mismatched. Don't bother me anymore!"

Dimas put both of his palms to my cheeks. "Nia, I understand how you feel. But ... I .. I just love you."

"Then, leave Nessa. Marry me!"

"Nia, I'll marry you. But not for now."

I took Dimas' hand off my face. I looked at the eagle's eyes deeply. Kuhela took a long breath. Withstanding the tightness in my chest, I said, "Dimas, I want to break up!"

Dimas was shocked to hear my statement. "W-What were you just kidding, Nia?"

"I want to break up!"

Dimas grabbed my shoulder tightly. "Nia .. You're not seriously saying this, are you?"

I took a breath back. And with wet eyes, I told her again, "I WANT US TO BREAK UP!"

For a few seconds, Dimas looked at me unmoved. His eagle eyes made sure that something was emanating clearly from both of my eyes. Like I was looking, there was something wrong with me.

"You lied, Nia. You're not seriously saying it, are you? You ... You cannot decide me. I ... I've been waiting for you for years in pain, Nia. I'm waiting for you to get divorced from Bastian. And now ... now we just go further" Dimas said, shaking my back.

"But unfortunately, we're still at the same point. You never showed at all that you really wanted to go any further."

Dimas looked at me with teary eyes. "Don't leave me, Nia. Really ... I'm going crazy without you."

I took Dimas' hand off my shoulder. "I'm tired of our uncertain relationship. I'm an ordinary woman, not an angel. And I'm not your puppet, which you can treat anything. I am a human being, I have limits of patience. I'm ...." I looked back at my face, which was still crying.

"Nia, please .. Give me some time."

"Look!" I put my finger in front of his face. "START NOW, WE BREAK UP!!"

Dimas tightened his jaw. Holding something that seems to want to be said. The eyes of the eagle reddened, holding clear circles that had forced to spill.

"Go!" expirku. "Don't see me again!"

Without saying a word, Dimas directly pushed my body against the wall. He put his body in my body. Furious, he tried to bring his lips closer to mine.

Plaque!

I'll give a slap to his face.

Dimas looked at me sharply. His hands blocked both of my wrists, nailing him to the wall. Then he brought his lips back closer.

"I hate you so much!" I said as I turned my teary face away.

Dimas squeezed my wrists tightly. The distance of our faces is very close. But it stopped. He kept looking at me.

"Stay away from me! Forget me! And I'll erase you from my memory soon!"

Scratch the wet face of Dimas. And this is the first time, I've seen it fragile. The first time I saw him cry.

"Our relationship is over. WE BROKE UP!!"

Dimas let go of my hand slowly. For a moment, he sobbed in front of me. But he immediately left me. He came out of my room at a fast pace. And now it's my turn to sob in the room.

It's depressing. We've been fighting against all kinds of trials in our relationships. And all are not easy steps. I lamented my pain. Why meet, when you finally have to separate. Why love, when it is hurt.

I sent my body down, sitting on the floor. I hugged my knees, put my face in my arms. I let my eyes and my heart out all emotions. That I'm being very fragile, fragile.

- CONNECTED --

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The crooked Readers are still loyal, huh?

It's heading towards the ending, loh. You must know the ending.

The next episode, tomorrow, Author Kecheh will open up the reason, why Dimas can't leave Nessa.

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