
Burning flames of jealousy, it made Bang Jack not want to talk to me. Even she said it blatantly as I turned to her.
On the way back to that apartment, Bang Jack only talked when he took me out of the car to order food at the restaurant. Then, next, he just spoke again when we got into the apartment, he said he wanted to eat in the room and he asked me not to bother him.
I concur. Even though I just nodded and said nothing, I agreed. Although my love and longing for her made me want to be around her, warm in her arms, but I couldn't prevent myself from keeping my distance from her for reasons I couldn't understand. I was afraid that our togetherness this time was a mistake that could harm ourselves, and I felt that I needed time to be alone.
Time seemed to run slowly that afternoon, and in the seconds that time went by, I felt even more restless. I was caught up in a worry that was hard for me to understand and hard for me to predict. I really didn't know and couldn't guess what was going to happen to me until the answer came at exactly seven o'clock in the evening: James called me over a video link to accompany me to dinner. After that, he told me to take the medicine -- under his watch.
Submissively, I did all of his orders. I injected the drug myself into my body, a drug that James had prepared with the usual dose in a syringe.
"I love you. Thank you for being a very obedient wife to me."
I'm nodding.
"Good night, sweetie."
"Good night, My James.
"Bye."
The phone connection was cut off, and I decided to go straight to sleep.
But that's not what happened.
Something's. Something strange happened to me, and my anxiety grew. I feel the rage. Practically, I began to think a no-no. The fertilizing drugs that I have been consuming have never caused a reaction like this. Then, that strange feeling made me think that it was a stimulant drug.
Butwhy? Why would James do this? Does he want to test my loyalty? But this is so torturous....
Not so, James. It's wicked. Why do you have the heart for me when I always obey your orders? Wh why? You're evil....
No, Rose. The little voice in my head was buzzing. You don't obey her every time you're with Jack. Your love always makes you fall asleep and makes you betray your marriage. You can't deny that fact.
Thas right. I'm guilty. I betrayed my marriage. I thought I'd love to call James for an explanation, at least a confirmation or just tell him what happened to me if he said he didn't know anything. Even if, maybe I'll get the condemnation that he wants me to keep my restraint, maybe even he'll admit that I'm a virgin and he wants me to keep that for him, I will accept whatever happens, as James wants.
But, again, that's not what happened. James' phone could not be reached.
Did he accidentally disable his phone? Why, God? Why would I be stuck in a situation like this? I can't stand it....
My tears are getting bigger. I ran to the bathroom, I opened my nightgown and turned on the faucet. My body was drenched, wet with cold water. But free, the heat overwhelmed me from within.
Minutes later, Bang Jack's anxious voice sounded outside the room. He who had not wanted to talk to me all day now called me frantically and begged to open the door.
"James sent me a message. I'm afraid something's happened to you" Bang Jack's voice rang out loud. "Please open the door, Rose. Let me in. Please.please, dear...."
Nnnnope. I was afraid to imagine what would happen if you were around me. I'm afraid I can't help myself. And what will happen if that happens? No, Bang. Nnnnope. Let me suffer alone.
"Rose...," Bang Jack's screams rang out again. This time it was filled with despair. "Don't torment me.." she roared. "I know something happened to you. Open the door, Rose...! Open it!"
I choose to stay. And on the other hand, Bang Jack started trying to break down my bedroom door.
How is this, God? When I did not want this to happen, but your destiny seemed to say something else. This wouldn't happen if you didn't want it yourself, would it? But this.Your destiny makes me tired to live. I'm weary....