Thaha
need you

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according to the appointment I had made this morning with doctor Azura. in the afternoon I came directly to the practice of doctor Azura who was beside her house

the house is quite comfortable and beautiful, although located in the central city but able to present a beautiful green scenery, I became curious how the house belongs to Louis. when will we visit there....?

doctor Azura was waiting for me. And thank God when I came to the clinic his is quiet, so I can consult freely and the important thing is not to wait longer than I should

the explanation from doctor Azura about how the program for breast milk production amazed me, not amazed by the sophisticated technology today

but how God has designed so perfectly the structure of our bodies in order to fit the role that God has set.how a mother who when she was pregnant, how, Allah has prepared with a special hormone that only women have, and from it Allah makes breast milk easy to produce

doctor Azura explained at length the process of hormone therapy that I have to do, and because this therapy takes a long time, inevitably I have to take extra therapy to shorten the time, drug therapy and also pumps

and as a consequence of the sudden hormonal changes, quite dizzying emotional changes and physical changes I might experience

I just hope everything will be okay, and hopefully I'm strong enough to live it

because basically all the unnatural treatment on our bodies will certainly cause pain, let alone forced like this

before entering the therapy session, as usual do some checks, such as general health checks and important hormone checks

after everything feels fine, hormone therapy can be done to increase the hormones progesterone and estrogen in the blood

"ready....? it hurts a little, but it can still be held, it has been injected, right....? in shay'ah, sick but only for a moment" doctor Azura gave a cue before starting

it feels the same as when you get a vitamin injection or a painkiller injection

for now it is safe

I decided to go home after getting some prescription drugs that I can buy at the pharmacy and of course some diet foods that I should consume in the future during the therapy and breastfeeding process

I only hope for one thing, hopefully there will be no hormone poisoning or other unwanted things

the first day is still going well, I can still accompany Elio to play, study that has started online, and other activities

I can still smile and reassure Elio when I ask when she can breastfeed.I can still respond well

Elio no longer wanted to drink his formula from the moment Elio came home from the khola house the first time, inevitably I tried to get Elio to drink honey water instead. sometimes in the drink sometimes just stay, but more in the stay.

Elio says it doesn't taste good and Elio is still a baby so Elio has to drink breast milk instead of other drinks

isn't Elio still drinking water....?

when the first day could pass well, the second day began to come small trials.

the waist that began to hurt, the chest that feels tight and linu, as well as mood changes that often make Absyar and Abyan's legs stroke the chest

the two of them often bear the impact of my mood swings

the third day was even worse, my body felt sore, almost the same as exercise for a long time, or the same as when we finished cleaning a house that was quite messy

I often complain about having to eat the same menu as the previous days or cry suddenly because it went wrong.

brother Abyan even had to take Elio to sleep with him. Otherwise, at night I would have cried because I suddenly felt guilty for Elio

Louis always contacted me as usual, and I would often vent my grief by blabbing at length at Louis.

except for when I suddenly brought up the guilt of losing Baby. Louis will be silent and when I see the sad look on Louis' face I will cry and ask Louis to return to Indonesia

"home By....Hubby when is she coming home.....?"

when the question came out like a spell from my lips, Louis would not respond much except with the word "a little while longer"

even I often ask Louis to accompany me while doing pump therapy which is quite often. Louis will accompany me by staying patient to pick up my phone even when he has to meet with Daddy or with his co-workers in Indonesia

I had to be satisfied just by looking at Louis's face without getting any response when Louis was discussing the meeting

in addition to increasing the crybaby I also become more spoiled, and lazy to do anything that is quite heavy.

Elio was with me a lot when I was studying online, and when I saw one of my study friends who was breastfeeding her child, who was hiding in her khimar.I would cry suddenly

luckily I wasn't the one who filled out the study

and Elio will attentively embrace me and he will enter his body to embrace me from behind Khimar

instead of stopping crying, my crying will actually echo more. Usually Absyar will approach us by carrying a mobile phone that has been connected to Louis

there was once a time when my chest felt very painful and coincided with the clock for pump therapy, and the results were still the same as before the ASI did not come out. As usual I would cry. because the pain is incredible.

Elio used my HP to contact Louis, but unfortunately Louis was away with Daddy. In the end, Elio called Abyan's brother when Abyan was in an online lecture

Elio came to cry because he saw me crying while doing therapy

"hiks enough hiks Mommy. enough hiks don't do that. Daddy.uuaaaaa"

a week passed from the beginning of therapy until now the results are still the same.no drop of ASI came out

even tonight, after praying isya' bersama'ah I sit in the middle room, there is Rama and also the mother who is cool wrapping gifts for the child of one of Rama's sisters. in other words for my cousin

he said he was again a milad so asked for his card to be sent to the address of his cottage in Pasuruan.

while I was accompanying Elio learning to know colors

Elio could already name a few colors exactly there were a few colors he forgot and there was one color that was the hardest for me to change his name.he always called that one color by the name of the fruit

"What color is this Elio...?" I pointed at the blueberry picture

"silk"

"this one....? this time I pointed to the picture of the bus

"tunnuts"

"yellow"

"tunnuts"

"Ning"

"Mrs"

Mungin it's still too hard for Elio....?

"if this one....?" now I'm pointing to the apple picture

"apple" as usual Elio will say red with the name apple

"red"

"apple"

"red dear"

"apple"

"me-rah"

"ap-glue"

ok, I give up, we try next time

now I moved to sit on the sofa with my mother, leaving Elio still struggling with a new puzzle brought by Mai this morning, when Mai invited me to go see Azura's doctor

"Mom, last time Zu consul with doctor Azura, Zu advised to directly breastfeed Elio to more quickly stimulate the production of ASI, Zu should how....?"

I tried to ask for help mom, mother is more experienced about this, although mother has never done therapy like me, but mother used to say if at birth brother Abyan ASI mother also did not come out directly

"yes directly in try dong dear, why even confused.....?" mother stopped her activities to wrap the gift and gave it up completely to Rama

"in a moment ma, I talked to Zu first, ask for help to continue first"

"it's all in, isn't it.....?" Rama asked for some food on the table

"yes stay in the entrance"

"go to Zu's room, I'll help if Zu gets confused"

mother stood up first, only after talking to Elio did I catch up with Elio who was in my arms

his hand immediately stopped the activity that was originally cool to play the puzzle when he heard my request

...~*TBC**~...

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