THE FORMER SHADOW
17. Plan

Nuraini came out of Arshaka's room, she closed the door tightly. Badrina pushed Arshaka's body until the man slammed onto the floor and ran quickly towards the restroom. Badrina tried to neutralize the embarrassment that had arisen within her.

Badrina walked back and forth while clutching the bathrobe on the chest. His forehead was patted as an expression of regret. The woman cursed herself who was so easily ignited by the flames of negative emotions.

Badrina realized there was a problem that was not right concerning her psychic. Badrina rejected the thought that she was having a disorder. However, it is proven that emotions so quickly take over his brain and body.

His mind drifted back to the incident at the Cantara school earlier. How Badrina engaged a fistfight with the parents of the disciple without full mind awareness. Thank goodness his clothes were not torn because of resistance. There was Arshaka there who helped him.

Badrina shook her head. She was afraid of her imagination when there was no ex-husband. Is Badrina supposed to thank Arshaka for saving her from a possible incident with a humiliating ending?

Arshaka left the room after a few minutes of waiting for Badrina who never appeared from the restroom.

Arshaka went out into the living room. There he found Nuraini standing on her back.

"Ma, I can explain what you saw earlier," Arshaka said directly to the core.

Nuraini turned her body. "Give Mama an explanation" Nuraini asked as she sat on the sofa.

"There was a misunderstanding between us, Ma. Not something serious" Arshaka said as he sniffed his shoulders.

"Astagfirullah Arshaka, if you are still husband and wife, your mother understands. Mama's worried you're forcing Badrina!" nuraini, covering her face with both hands.

"Forced?" Arshaka tries to process her mother's words. "Oh.. No Ma this isn't like Mama-"

"Already, Shaka! Don't dodge it!" cut Nuraini with bulging eyes.

Arshaka gawked, he judged Nuraini had misunderstood the events between the ex-husband and his wife.

Not long after, Badrina came. He sat away from Arshaka, still ashamed. "Ma, I'm sorry about what happened earlier. I couldn't help but do it to Shaka. He started first, Ma," said Badrina as she bowed.

Nuraini glared at her son, Arshaka waved to the left and right a sign of innocence. Arshaka wants to stop Badrina because her speech means double.

"I was overcome with emotion and then took it out on Shaka, Ma. I need to practice self-control. I'm sorry, Ma." Badrina continued talking, she really regretted her childish-looking attitude when talking to Arshaka earlier.

Arshaka shook his head while closing his eyes.

"Good Badrina. Thank you for your confession. Mama hope this doesn't happen again because you're no longer husband and wife. Must be able to hold each other back. If necessary when you meet, there is the presence of other parties avoiding events like that," Nuraini said. Badrina nodded in agreement to Nuraini's words.

Arshaka lowered his head massaging the temple, he exhaled air from his mouth, grimacing at the conversation of his mother and ex-wife.

Arshaka had no intention of correcting, he let the conversation just flow.

"Shaka, Mama reminded me not to tease Badrina" Nuraini said, pointing at Arshaka. "Yes, Mama would like to pick Cantara up for a while to the park. Don't fuck around, Shaka!" press Nuraini before leaving the living room.

Arshaka let out a long sigh and rubbed her face for a moment before leaning her back against the sofa.

Arshaka stared back at Badrina. "Mama thinks I'm teasing you," replied Arshaka pointing at her and Badrina while commenting on a slanted smile.

Badrina became aware of a misunderstanding in the conversation with Nuraini earlier. Both of his hands closed his gaping mouth. Badrina fell silent, she felt even more ashamed of Arshaka.

A short message went into Arshaka's phone there was a call from the office.

"Ok Rina, I can't linger" Arshaka said as she kept her phone in her work-clothes pocket. Arshaka stood up before leaving in his place saying, "The scent of your body lotion smells, I love."

Arshaka really made Badrina like a boiled crab, her face flushed and warmed.

"Oh yeah, I'm really seriously advising you to go to a psychiatrist. If we're not ready, you can find information about your emotions, specific emotions." Arshaka tidied up her slightly tangled clothes.

After Arshaka, Badrina sat pensively. Arshaka's words were like a whip for him to pay attention to himself. Her memory returns to the book that Danish had given her while she was away on vacation, and Badrina steps into the room and searches for the book.

Shining the eyes of Badrina to find the book he was looking for, he was increasingly interested to explore the content of the book that the content was connected to what Badrina experienced. Badrina sat in front of her dresser, occasionally looking in the mirror and talking to herself about her past experiences.

The book is about how to re-parent yourself. Piles of inner wounds carried from childhood do not disappear over time, even when adults the wound even finds its channel if it is not healed. For Badrina, that was her. That's what he's experiencing now.

Unknowingly, Badrina flipped through the book for an hour. He was determined to finish by making a routine of reading in his daily schedule. Even if you will see an expert on psychiatry, at least Badrina came not with a vacuum condition.

Badrina was sad to remember her quarrel with Mama Parama. He is still difficult to accept Cantara made to cry by others. However, he realized he was a typical short-spoken person who easily pretended to big emotions.

Putting her forehead to the arm-bottomed dressing table, Badrina weighed how tomorrow she brought Cantara to school. The boy could get bullied back. Badrina felt very guilty and sorry. His troubled self, Cantara must also bear it. Badrina sleepy-knock her head to come out a good idea.

"Mama...mama why?" Cantara panicked to find her mother's forehead bumping against the table.

Badrina was surprised, "Canta is home. Where's oma?" Badrina asked back.

"Oma in the kitchen, Ma, want to prepare dinner said Oma," said Canta, "Mama what happened?" ask Cantara back.

"Oh, that was Mama thought that if the forehead collided with the table, Mama's brain became more sintered, it was wrong." Badrina chuckled, not intending to lie to her son. "Udah afternoon, Canta take a bath, son," Badrina persuaded.

"Ma, um. tomorrow Canta doesn't go to school." Badrina who had stood back up sat down, observing the face of Cantara.

"Why? Can you tell Canta's feelings to Mama?" Badrina tried to understand her daughter's side of her feelings.

"Canta hasn't wanted to meet Parama, Ma," Cantara lowered her head, "Canta's not happy with Parama" he continued.

Badrina was fixated on her son's last sentence. That is what he felt when he clashed with mama Parama.

Badrina stroked Cantara's head, "Mama will tell Papa yes," Badrina concluded.