LOVE IN TASBIH DETAILS
CHAPTER 79. JUST BE ATIFA FOR A SECOND

(Flasback Atifa in his first consciousness upon Faraz's arrival in Chapter 73)

Author will bring readers to Atifa, see what's in his head when he meets Faraz😅😅

Slowly, Atifa turned around aided by Aisyah. His eyes were pounded on a frail body figure and looked tired as well as in shock at the same time.

Atifa's eyes grew bigger, trying to recognize her, somehow her brain suddenly seemed like a rollercoaster toying with half of her memory, back and forth incoherently.

And, he crashed at a point of consciousness, like someone who had just reached one place and when in enthusiasm retraced, he met the one he wanted to see but his heart felt empty.

"Sister Faraz..." Atifa recalled those shady eyes, recognizing him clearly. But his lips could say nothing but look at him unblinkingly.

Faraz was still standing at the door with a foreign man, and Faraz's aging body was trembling as he looked at Atifa. He was quite different from the last time Atifa litiah, almost like a brittle wood.

Elegant longing, heartache, hate and revenge fused, racing to hit his feelings that somehow seemed numb.

"Sir...?" The call was like a thunderbolt greeting Atifa's ears. The vegetables from the past, came like a ghostly voice.

"What's wrong with you, brother?" The voice was heard in a stinging tone coming out from Faraz's mouth, between crying and fear.

Atifa stared at Faraz for so long, barely blinking, her lips tightly clenched, her tongue so twisted. I want to cry and scream at the same time.

"Mother? Do you remember him?" The question Aisyah was hugging her neck felt made it difficult to breathe, tears fell suddenly without being able to hold her, her eyes as if numb.

Atifa did not answer, her eyes were pounded straight at Faraz, eyes sore when blinking. The person in front of her was the first love she had been waiting for, which made her reluctant to move from the same place, even willing to lock up time to stay in the past because he did not want to accept the fact Faraz had betrayed him.

"He's the father, who I always wait for day and night." The whisper of Ayesha rahu in her ear.

"I...Ishaaah? I...Your mom?" Faraz was seen approaching, with short steps and one-on-one. Atifa was about to stand up to meet him and hug him as tightly as possible, as when Faraz returned from his workplace in Kalimantan with a cardboard souvenir and a new toy for Aisyah.

"Dad..." Aisyah stroked Atifa's head gently, her son's hands remaining the same, as tender as her childhood. Then she was slightly awake, this Aisyah in the adult version, she was very similar to her.

"Where was I when she became an adult girl in her metamorphosis from her hilarious childhood? where the hell?" The question seemed to ring in his head, making him dizzy for a moment.

"Mom lost her memory after I left her." The continued sentence of Aisyah immediately convinced Atifa's memory, as her beautiful daughter said that to Faraz in a tone made as calm as possible.

"Mother only knows waiting for father, she becomes oblivious to herself. Even we. We have lost Faiq."

"Pha..Faiq?"

"Faiq is a child that I left without having seen his face because he was still in the womb. He's my brother, a special, handsome boy. He has gone first to heaven."

After the sentence that Aisyah said, immediately the head of Atifa seemed to swirl. He was trying to recognize what he heard to gather a bit of his memory but a strange pain, sadness overcame his feelings. Atifa closed her eyes, squeezed her own hands, she heard nothing, the sounds were seething in her head. He tried hard not to shout and cry as he used to when this feeling came.

"Fayq? who is Faiq? why is it so foreign but feels like I once had a memory of him? Faiq's? why do I miss calling that name?" Atifa did not blink looking straight ahead tensely.

"Bronch!"

Faraz fell down, making Atifa realize, right in front of Atifa's feet who was sitting tensely booming with her own memories and feelings.

Atifa was dumbfounded, she remembered rightly this was her dear Faraz brother whom she adored with all her body soul. Her husband was gentle and very attentive to her. The husband she thinks is the best.

She was now crying out loud, a cry that, though sad but not enough to warm Atifa's frozen heart.

Atifa's memory is in a piece of Faraz's letter, which she found at dawn blind, in the place where her husband lay before they went to sleep.

Dik Atifa's...

I'm sorry, I'm so sorry,

I can't leave Ani if you ask me to leave her.

I love her, just like I loved you.

Weight took everything off, but I knew you would be fine with Aisyah without me.

You may hate me for my choice, but I've been thinking about it all night and I can't let Ani wait for me alone.

There's no lack of you as a wife, but I'm the imperfect husband.

I'll go, and maybe never come back, tell Aisha and our child you're about to give birth to, that their father is dead, drowning in swamps in Kalimantan or drifting under the flow of the Barito river. I can't go back when I'm too far away,

Dik Atifa, I'm talking about you and I'm freeing you from all your duties as a wife to me.

Marry a good man, I will love the world.

From me,

Pharas

What a pity he had with the contents of the letter, the sentence of words, word for word, stuck in his mind, for it had been read a hundred times in the first while weeping for Faraz's departure.

In the face of his now aging face, much time has robbed him of his time and Atifa in her belief trust Faraz back.

But when he came back...Atifa was numb, even now that Faraz resembled an unfamiliar figure, her longing evaporated like dew in the blazing morning.

***

(Yeay...double UP yaaaa🤗🤗🤗 hopefully we can see the mind of people who are mentally disturbed through different angles. They are actually just confined in their own imagination, fighting reality in different ways. They just follow what is in their head, not always what they see. God gives us wisdom and wisdom to be able to harmonize it, only sometimes we do not want to use it)

Thank you for reading the novel and always being faithful, you are the darling of othor🤗 i love you full.......

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