LOVE IN TASBIH DETAILS
CHAPTER 8. MEANING

 “I forgot when was the last time I did fasting.” Bram continued shyly.

Mr. Sharif raised his eyebrows, deep down he may be surprised, people the age of Bram, can not be said to be just young but mature, in the age of thirties and he is a Muslim, he said, it feels strange to listen to people forget when he ever performed fasting.

“Do you know nak Bram, what does fasting mean?” Sharif asked carefully, as if afraid to offend the man sitting with his legs folded in front of him.

Bram was silent, Matanaya did not blink staring at Mr. Sharif, he did not try to answer at all, because he really did not know, except every month of Ramadan every year, every year, a Muslim is obliged to do fasting. For the rest, he could not explain it properly. He was too old to remember what his religious teacher taught him in childhood, so immersed in his earthly life that everything related to God he almost forgot.

He remembered that his wife always tried to wake him up in the morning but he would angrily rebuke his wife for disturbing his sleep.

And he also went berserk almost turning the table, when when he woke up there was no food on the table, while the day was almost noon.

“Why is there no food here? What's your job all day? Sleep on? Do you know what it means to serve your husband? Why are you being a wife is not at all becus? You don't have to do it if you don't want to, we have a maid, you just tell me what's hard, Hah!”

The memory suddenly returned, when he was furious with Diah one day.

“But, mas..” Diah bowed in fear, she was still wearing mukena, maybe just praying or something.

 “You know, this is what makes me not feel at home for a long time, in any case you are not at all sick! From the business of serving in bed to the kitchen, you are not at all smart. This is what you always call a wife?” He almost threw a tissue at Diah, as Diah slashed at him and held his wrist. Beni who was sitting on the dining table chair while holding a picture book looked at them with her quizzical eyes. He was terrified when he heard his papa yelling loudly at his mother.

“Mas, earlier I had awakened mas for sahur, but mas did not want to wake up.”

“You are bod0h why wake up a sleeping person to eat! Now I'm hungry..”

“But it's fasting month, mas. As Muslims, we are obliged to fast.”.

“Don't teach me about obligations. Because I won't hear you. Make me food now!”

“Mas, it is not good to eat in front of children during the fasting month, I have taught them to fast, as parents it is not good if we set an example that is not.”.

“Jeez...stop that talk, Diah!” Bram threw his hand on the table, along with Beni's cry that hugged his mother with a stagger, and with a big smile Diah hugged Beni, without caring for Bram's eyes that were bulging as big as marbles.

“It's okay, dear..it's okay.” Diah calms Beni down, but Bram can see the tears in the woman's face with the tip of her face.

His sin felt like a boulder, squeezing his shoulders, making his head bowed so deeply, barely able to lift.

“I. I don't know what fasting is like. I...I am a sinner.” Two clear feathers fell on the corner of his eye. He did not dare to raise his head at all.

“You know son, why is the month of Ramadan always missed? One month is a month full of grace and blessings so that in it there is forgiveness and prayers are granted. In this month there is also a guarantee of liberation from the fires of hell for those who fill the holy month with sincerity.” Mr. Sharif smiled, his eyes sparkling warmly as Bram slowly raised his head to look at the old man.

"When we fast, we feel hunger and thirst, and experience the daily life of our less fortunate brothers and sisters. We may never feel deprived, we may never feel hunger but from fasting we learn to understand that rice on a plate is a valuable object for some people who are less able. Fasting tells us what fraternity really looks like, and the beauty of when we can share.” Mr. Syarif tidied up the pecinya, his smile seemed wide and sincere when telling stories.

“Nak Bram, if you are Muslim, baligh, reasonable, capable, muqim and have no barriers, then it is an obligation for you to perform fasting.  Fasting is worship to Allah ta’ala accompanied by intention, that is, intention because Allah ta’ala.”

“Is fasting just to hold hunger and thirst?” The question was raised without Bram being able to hold it. How little does he know about this worship, except in childhood if he managed to pass the fast then he will get angpao or bought something by his mother. As an adult, this question makes Pak Syarif's eyebrows not unkempt.

“Fasting is not just refraining from eating, drinking but includes all fasts including restraining your other worldly passions. Since the second dawn to sunset, which is from the time of the morning prayer until the time of Maghrib prayer. Fasting received is fasting which means achieved. So never lie, gossip, complain, perjury, and look with orgasm, when you intend to fast." Mr. Sharif sighed for a moment.

"And remember this one thing son, a time when you have loved fasting, then your heart feels peaceful when you know that the holy month of Ramadan is coming soon. You will be reminded of all the pleasures that have been felt such as God's promises of forgiveness, the beauty of eating sahur, the joy of breaking and the joy of gathering together with those who love you.”

Bram stuck, his heart ached when he heard the last sentence from Mr. Sharif, about the pleasure of gathering with those who love us, because now he feels he has no one who really loves him. She had made her little Beni die, Diah the wife left her and Bella who is now with her mother.

 “Nak, soon dawn rises, we should go home first, this morning Aisyah will cook a lot.  Because today is Abah's birthday, so I invite you to eat with us.” Mr. Sharif flicked his scabbard, a sign that he was ready to rise and move on.

"Eat at home?"

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