Wagering
Overthinking

Blue knew something was wrong with her as she fell asleep despite closing her eyes an hour and a half ago. There are also different styles of sleep that he has tried. Starting from the back, tilted to the right, tilted to the left, even the stomach though. But none of those sleeping positions managed to make him sleep.

Not only adjust the sleeping position, Blue also tried various ways to help him relax more so that he can make him sleep faster. In fact, random ways that he had never thought of before had even been tried. Like looking at a bulb above the ceiling of his room without blinking, for example. Instead of being sleepy, he felt a tremendous pain in his eyes because it forced him not to blink.

Finally, because all the efforts he made did not pay off as well, Blue gave up. He rose from his last position, half-turned, inching to close the blanket to wrap his whole body and then sat leaning on the bed.

His gaze began to re-crawl, piercing through the deserted ceiling of the room without any decoration. At this point, the shadow of Baskara's face that was holding back the pain of last night was again clearly displayed before his eyes, bringing back an uncomfortable feeling that he himself did not know how to repel.

Blue hates Baskara. It was something he had instilled into himself ever since the young man had left him. And revenge for the heartache he felt was the main goal so that he could stand in his place until now.

But, why did he actually feel the enormous tightness in his chest when he saw Baskara hurt? Shouldn't he not care anymore about whatever happened to that young man? Is it actually ... does he still love Baskara?

"Ooh!" Blue shook his head violently at the thought. A slap he also slapped into his own cheek, in order to restore his sudden minimal consciousness at half-two in the morning.

"He's human, you're human. It is natural to feel sympathy for another human being who is being stricken." His advice to himself. Not to forget also he remembered again what evil Baskara had done to him. For the sake of cultivating the intention of launching revenge so as not to be crushed just like that just by seeing the young man get slightly injured.

A few seconds later, he came back to dream. His chin rested on the arm he had piled on his bent knee. His mind was again full of revenge scenarios that were now a little tainted by other thoughts that should not have been present.

The word if it starts popping up a lot afterwards. Worsening his head that has been messy for a long time.

Had Baskara explained what happened before leaving. If both of his parents were not dead. Had he decided to remain the Sabiru he once was.

Blue so questions a lot of things armed with if it was. He was just curious, would his life path be different, if there were only a few things that were changed from his past?

Some say, midnight is hours prone to overthinking. That is why, Blue does not like to let himself dissolve in insomnia that keeps him awake until morning. Because of the many thoughts that are in his head so far in fact has managed to make him feel dizzy instead of playing. His mood was also suddenly bad, and he did not know which to validate which of the many mixed feelings.

I don't know what Blue thinks when he moves closer to the nightstand, plucks the phone when he has turned it off and turns it back on with silly anxious expectations.

After the phone lit up, and the light illuminated the room he had left pitch-black, Blue could only smile brightly upon finding three messages all of which came from Fabian. It was not far from asking if he had slept, or what he wanted to do before he fell asleep.

Ridiculously, Blue instead felt disappointed, because the question did not come from Baskara.

"You know what exactly, Bi?" ask him to himself.

"Please, don't be labil. You are not the old Blue anymore, you have transformed into a stronger Blue. Remember that, you dumb." He patted his own head. Maybe because a slow slap alone is not powerful enough to make his consciousness back.

For the next few minutes, what Blue did was to be silent like a lifeless body. His gaze was empty, inversely proportional to his back chest felt full and crowded.

...****************...

Fabian knows his relationship with Blue is limited to a deal that will expire in a matter of days. However, finding her message unrequited by the girl, inexplicably still caused an uncomfortable feeling in her heart.

Because of thinking that, Fabian even woke up until late at night. With the room in complete darkness, he sat leaning on the bed. The thick blanket that had originally wrapped his body was now helplessly stooped on the floor. Even with a pillow that plunged freely after he accidentally kicked when his legs felt cramped due to too long sitting cross-legged.

The confusion in Fabian's heart actually did not just come from his messages ignored by Blue, but also from the things he met during the trip to the hospital until when he drove the girl home.

Fabian realized something, that Blue became many times more reserved than usual. The girl also seemed reluctant to interact with Baskara, whereas with Juan and Reno, the girl was still willing to talk and even face each other for a long time.

You can't think without a solid foundation. So the principle that was set forth by Baskara when he first formed Pain Killer first. The principle that eventually succeeded made them become solid and not suspect each other.

But thanks to the interaction between Baskara and Sabiru that seemed strange, the principle seems no longer able to hold Fabian as strong as before. He just felt .. There was something between Baskara and Sabiru that escaped the knowledge of himself and the other members of Pain Killer.

Unfortunately, the guts that Fabian had from the first were minimal. So that he could not approach Baskara to ask him directly. Be he can only guess, made dizzy with the thoughts he presents and maintain his own.

Closer to dawn, Fabian's head grew noisier. He also no longer knows how to stop random thoughts that constantly come bombarding his head.

"Ah, just keep thinking, Bi. Think until your head explodes." The discussion to yourself. So unable to withstand the commotion in the head, Fabian finally jumped down from the bed. He dragged his steps out of the room, then walked back and forth down the stairs to make sure his mother wasn't around.

After being sure it was safe, Fabian began to straighten up and walk with more confidence.

The whole house was in the dark, as usual. But that did not deter Fabian's intention to eventually break into his mother's alcohol storage.

There, like finding heaven, Fabian's eyes sparkled brightly. One bottle of wine that had been stored long enough in the warehouse he took, then he took it to one of the chairs.

Just three seconds after his butt touched the chair, the wine bottle cover he opened, and in an instant the concentrated liquid had escaped past his throat.

Sips. Two sips. Three sips. Until not counting how many sips that managed to enter the digestive tract.

Unfortunately, instead of subsiding, Fabian's head was even more throbbing. The result of the amount of alcohol that enters, as well as random thoughts that accumulate.

Seriate