Pamite
81. Exams

It's been three days Rifki's been hospitalized. Stated paralyzed in the legs and eyes are still covered with bandages makes Rifki feel lost hope. It changed. Become more quiet and moody. Even the presence of Dara was unable to publish a smile on Rifki's lips.

Today is the day everyone is waiting for. The Rifki bandage will be opened. Everyone was impatient, waiting anxiously and anxiously. Although doctors say Rifki is most likely blind, the extended family still hopes for a small possibility that comes true. There is nothing wrong with good expectations, right?

"Sister, in the afternoon your bandage will be opened. We can look at each other soon. You miss fighting me, do you miss me?" Dara did not give up making Rifki personal back as before. The accident that caused paralysis in his leg made Rifki change completely.

"I can't do anything, I'm useless. You better find a normal husband, I'm already disabled." I don't know how many times Rifki said that.

"Your legs are still healing, you don't hear that the doctor said you can walk again with regular therapy?" sulcan Dara.

"But for a long time, I don't want you waiting. I know what it's like to wait, get out of my life, Dara."

"I don't want to. I want to be with you, why, sis you are so changed? Do you doubt my love? You don't believe that I accept you for who you are? Tell me what to do, brother let you believe." Dara's tone of voice was abnormal, her mouth was shaking violently.

Even with her eyes closed, Rifki knew Dara was trying hard to hold back her tears. Perih it feels Rifki's heart to imagine Dara who must be sad with her condition. What else was his attitude that turned cold must have also hurt his heart.

Trust me, Rifki doesn't want to do this. His own heart is not willing if he hurts his lover. He did this not out of complacency, he himself was also tormented by being cold like this.

"What the hell do you expect from me? I'm paralyzed, what do I want to do? No company accepts people in wheelchairs. If we continue our relationship to marriage, I can't give a living to you. Even there I trouble you. I don't want to trouble people. It's enough for me later that I'm having trouble with. I don't want to involve anyone else."

"Other people? You think I'm someone else, brother? You forget what we went through to get to this point? The ones with your leg and eye injuries, brother. Your memory is not." Dara started sobbing.

A dull dagger is heart-wrenching. It hurt, hurt, and hurt her heart. In the bandage Rifki let out her tears.

Still sounding faintly Dara's sobbing. As soon as the door was loud shut, Rifki immediately shed her tears. What was painful now was not only his heart, but also his eyes behind the bandage.

The man drowned his face into his palm. It felt like he could no longer endure with his determination. Again he reminded himself to keep the happiness of Dara. There's no way she's selfish by letting Dara stay with her. The current situation seems to be able to make Rifki lose her confidence.

This is the second time Rifki's life has been shattered into the smallest pieces. He could not find and collect all the pieces so that they would return to fullness.

The same thing he felt when Ayu married Anang. As the pieces of his heart began to slowly accumulate, the universe again destroyed it even more severely.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I have to be this way for you too, I just don't want your future just to take care of me. I know I can heal, but trust me, I'm doing this for your happiness, I want you to be happy." Rifki spoke with sobbing.

One sudden touch Rifki felt on his shoulder. Very friendly and warm. Rifki doesn't know who he is, there's no sound of footsteps coming into his room. Or he who does not hear because his ears only hear his own stuffing.

"I know you're not doing this out of your will. We know you're new, but I understand you more than you know. I understand your mindset and your character is as big as Ayu's. You can lie to Dara, but not to me. Know it? Dara was crying on the shoulder of your mother who had just come. You've been breaking her heart since yesterday, yesterday she didn't cry in front of you, she's still strong, but you don't know how broken Dara's heart seems to be fusing. You were the first man who managed to make Dara roar, sob, hysterical, even he never treated me like that. You're special, Rif for him." Jaka sat in front of the bed.

"I'm lucky to have him, but not for him, Jak. You know, I'm most likely blind. I can heal with my feet, but for my eyes? Maybe, yes I could have surgery but wouldn't that take a very long time? Jak, try to think this is from the male side, don't think as you're Dara's sister. It would be so useless to me in my present condition. Even to take care of myself I can't, how can I take care and take care of Dara later. I don't want him to suffer because of my selfishness that only cares about my feelings. I love him, Jak. I know you won't doubt my words. That's why I want the best for him. I want him to live a normal life, not take care of me who is not this useful. How can I give him a living inner birth, Jak?"

Jaka just took a long breath. He admits it's not easy being a Rifki. Self-esteem for men is work, and in Rikfi conditions like this, it is not easy to make a living.

"I'm sure you'll side with me if you think on the men's side, right? You're quiet, which means you're confused who you should be on. One side you know me and Dara love each other, we are both hurt by my current situation. But on the other hand, what I said just now was the truth. Dara's future is still long, Jak. I'm willing to lose him, if he's happy. That's all I want."

"If you are happy how are you?"