IT'S ME YOU HURT
Go to the mall

Regina's words made me realize that my life has to go. Although this is the end of my story with Angga, my story still has to continue. There was Ziva and my family with me who loved and always supported me. And I have to make sure in my story this time I don't meet a jerk like Angga mas anymore.

Mother will always try to keep me busy, either by telling me to take care of the plants or by asking for help to process food or snacks from the garden behind the house.

This time we made chips from cassava and pickled papaya and pineapple. I love spicy chips and pickled papaya.

After I finished processing the food, I sat down to enjoy the spicy chips while playing with Ziva in front of the television.

"Ma, why don't we go home? Ziva has never seen papa." My son asked in a funny voice and was still cedel.

Ah, my son, even in my parents' house, Ziva is surrounded by people who love him, but Ziva still misses his father.

"Honey. Now our house is here. Papa's busy working so can't see Ziva."

I'm trying to find an excuse for my son not to ask me again about his papa.

"But Ziva wants to see papa sekalang, Ma. Why didn't you come here anyway?"

"Yes dear, papa will be busy later mama try to call papa if papa is not busy. Hopefully soon Ziva can meet papa."

"Ziva wants a bitch!"

"Ziva, listen to mama. Now papa is busy, so it can't be bothered! Now our house is here with oma, opa, aunt Gina, and aunt Reva!" I tried to speak slowly trying to give Ziva some understanding.

"Yes mamaa." Ziva tried to obey but with a face like unwillingness.

My son really misses his dad. His name is also his own father. I know the importance of a father figure to a daughter. I will have to fight for custody of Ziva if the divorce verdict comes out later, but I will also not separate the relationship between Angga and Ziva.

Although all this time Angga impressed cuek to me. Yeah, it's been a while since Angga didn't seem to love me anymore. But Angga loved Ziva so much. His name is also his own son. If Angga comes home from work and does not feel tired and Ziva also has not slept, mas Angga will play and joke first with Ziva.

Ah, my heart hurts when I remember Angga. God why is it still so painful to think of a husband who will soon be an ex-husband.

I don't want to get too late in this feeling.

God help me! Strengthen me! Plug me!

****

This week everyone is home. Reva took me and Ziva on the way to the mall.

He said he just got a dividend-sharing bonus at the bank where he works. Gina could not join because she had to complete her college assignment which was to be sent this afternoon.

Actually I'm not good at spending my sister's money that she's hard-earned. Plus Reva also self-financed his college. But Reva insists on taking Ziva on the road, and Reva promises Ziva a big pony. Almost every day Ziva would ask for the pony Reva promised. Such is the child if it has promised, it must be fulfilled immediately.

I wore a pink blouse with a picture of a pony, combined with a knee-length skirt and socks and pink shoes. My hair's pigtail 2 with a little pony ribbon. Ah, my son is so funny.

Arriving at the mall we rushed to the kids area. Ziva played for 1 hour there. After playing we plan to go to the toy store to find a large pony doll, the plan after that we just looking for food.

Unknowingly, the Ziva that I was holding her hand came out of my grasp. He was so eagerly running towards his papa that he missed so much. Mas Angga immediately hugged Ziva's body.

"Papa, why don't you go to the mall with Ziva? Who's this aunt, who's hugging papa??"

Ziva asked his father seriously. I could only see them from outside the store. Coincidentally, Angga and Raya stood close to the entrance.

"Papa Ziva's answer!? Mama said, papa syibuk kelja so can not meet Ziva. Why can you walk to this same aunt mall?" Oh my God, a two-and-a-half-year-old boy from where can courage and intelligence say that?!

Like a thief caught off guard, Angga panicked and confused to answer Ziva's question.

"Mama here! Just put it there." The gendongan mas Angga. Ziva tried to call me who was still silently stuck in front of the store.

"Well, that looks like his wife. Who is the woman next to him?" Said a passing mother.

"Huh, that's my high school friend, why is he friendly with om-om who already has children?" Said a teenage woman who was also passing by, it seemed like she was a friend of Raya's school.

"Waduh means this is his wife, and that's his affair dong." Said another mother watching them.

"Yes, it's true." As soon as they say.

"I'm ashamed, let's go home." Raya tugged at the arms of Angga while trying to hide her face with her long hair.

I just watched them, without any reaction. I want to see what Mas Angga will do in this situation.

"Wait a minute, baby." Bisik mas Angga di Raya.

It is undeniable, Mas Angga is very happy to meet Ziva. He also seems to miss his daughter Ziva, but whatever the current situation makes him ashamed of the people who see them, because there is also a beloved affair - his future wife.

"Dear Ziva, this is papa's coworker. Papa wants to continue working first. We'll see you again."

Mas Angga tried to find an excuse by lying.

"Yes, ayooo!" It seems like Raya has been unable to bear it, wanting to quickly disappear from this place.

"Great Time!"

Mas Angga kissed Ziva's cheek and let go of his embrace while lowering Ziva on the floor slowly.

"It's papa give you money to buy a toy that Ziva wants ya." Mas Angga spoke to Ziva quietly as a whisper, while spending a hundred thousand as much as ten pieces.

Ckck, that little boy was persuaded with money. Basic mas Angga. How to understand Ziva with a lot of money, he also did not I get used to the money because indeed I did not have much money while staying at the Angga mas house.

Mas Angga and Raya then came out through me like I did not know or never knew each other. Oh my God, how he got to me. Does she not regard me at all, even as the mother who gave birth to her child?!