The Lives of Five Hundred Thousand
The Hajj Bu

The arrival of the Hajj made me confused between letting her in or out. Because, if I go into the house, I'm afraid that Haji Bu will see Raihan and think like that about us. But if left outside it feels impolite.

"Si.please enter the Hajj ma'am." I finally told him to come in because I couldn't bear to see him standing outside.

Haji nodded his head slightly and walked into my house. His gaze circled around my contents because this was his first time visiting my house.

"Please sit down Hajj ma'am!" I let her sit on the living room couch and she sat on the couch.

"Where's your mother Nur?" ask Bu Haji who arrived to open his voice and ask where the mother is.

"Mother is away Hajj, ma'am" I replied. Mother was away but exactly was running away somehow run away where she was.

"So Mom, I'll make you a drink first." I was about to get out of the sight of Hajj but he prevented me.

"No need Nur, I'm only here for a moment. I just want to talk to you."

I paused my intention and sat down opposite Hajj ma'am. For a moment we were silent and I was waiting for the Hajj maam who started the conversation because he himself wanted to talk to me.

"Yesterday night I just came home from Bogor and heard the bad news in my ears."

I'm still listening and I don't want to chim in on Hajj Bu speaking.

"You want to know what news I got in this village after my return from Bogor?"

I was still silent and just looked down.

"News about you having an affair with my son, Raihan."

I re mas my knuckle book, a habit when I feel anxious. My guess is right that Hajj ma'am will talk about the gossip issues circulating in this village.

"Is that true, Nur?"

I looked up at my face looking at the Haji Ma who was looking at me seriously. I shook my head.

"I don't have any relationship with Raihan Bu, it's just gossip. We're just friends no more."

"Nur, you are a woman who already has a husband and children. While Raihan is single and too young. Regardless of whether or not you have a relationship that is very detrimental to me and also Raihan. What if your husband finds out that his wife is close to a single man? he would definitely be angry at Raihan Nur, and consider Raihan a pebinor. I don't want Raihan to be stamped as a player by people. Raihan is a good boy. All this time he had never gotten such cheap gossip. So I beg you Nur, please stay away from Raihan. Please do not damage his good image in the eyes of the people of Nur village, he is still too young, his future is still long. What if he's looked at badly by people and I don't want that to happen to my proud son. Again I beg you nur, please stay away from Raihan."

My saliva feels stuck in the throat getting a request from the Hajj ma'am. A plea that I stay away from Raihan's son. It may be true what Ma Haji said, I should not be close to Raihan who is too young and good. I don't have to ruin Raihan's good image in front of people. I was wrong, because I had unconsciously made Raihan the back of my life less fortunate.

I smiled with the smile I forced because basically I whose life is this sad very rarely can smile. Didzolimi by husband, milked by mother and hostile by my two brothers. There was no place for me to lean, complaining to me other than Raihan and now his mother is asking me to stay away from him.

"Bu Haji, I apologize if my friendship and Raihan has become a rumor in this village and made Bu Haji feel uncomfortable and lost. I realized I shouldn't be friends with good people like Raihan who always help me and my son. And I'm willing to do what Bu Haji wants to do to stay away from Raihan." Although it is actually hard to stay away from Raihan but I have to do it because I do not want to hurt the heart of Hajj because of my selfishness.

"Well, I hold your words Nur, I no longer want to hear or see you being with Raihan nur."

I nodded for sure.

Haji returned to his home. I went back inside after taking Mrs Haji to the terrace. I went into the TV room but did not find Raihan's whereabouts only Zain was sleeping on the carpet.

I called his name but there was no word. I looked for him in the room but I could not find him. Where'd Raihan go? thought me. When I opened the door to go outside the room. A tall stout body figure stuck to my back. Raihan hugged me from behind. I was shocked at his treatment.

"Rai..please let go, don't be like this?" Raihan did not release his embrace but rather tightened his.

"Wheels...!"

"What do you mean mba, tell my mom that she wants to stay away from me? can't be mba, it's been four years I've lost you. You don't know what it's like to be me, do you? I love you so much, I love you so much. Mba can't stay away from me, do you want to see me die?"

"Rai.what are you talking about? this is at the request of your mother Rai. Mother who gave birth and raised you. Please don't act like a child."

Raihan flipped my body so that our eyes looked at each other. Raihan looked at me disappointedly, while I looked at him with a nervous feeling.

"What did you say earlier? my attitude is like a child?"

I'm silent, I know I've been wrong to say he's a child because Raihan himself doesn't want to be called a child.

"Rai.a.a.I'm sorry, I don't mean..empp!" Before I continue my speech, he was******my lips were a little rough. I had a hard time removing my lips from the patch because one hand pushed the back of my head and the other held both hands. Raihan continued on ******my lips are merciless until he put my body on the bed and overstretched my body.

I can't move under his hunk because of his large body. Raihan took his lips off my lips for a moment. Along with the roar of his breath that was hunting Raihan said, "Mba said I'm a child? I'll prove it now, if I'm not a child but I'm a grown man who can satisfy mba" Raihan said with a grin. I'm so scared, I'm afraid Raihan's khilaf and doing too much.

Raihan took off the hijab I was wearing and the hair loop so that my hair was broken.

"Please let go of me Rai, don't be like this.I ask ma...empp!" Raihan ******my lips are back without mercy. After being satisfied on my lips he moved to kiss the orange of my neck to make me feel lulled by his touch. Unknowingly I de sah lirih felt the touch that Raihan gave. Raihan stopped his kiss for a moment and stared fixedly at both of my eyes.

"How can mba, is my warm-up capable of awakening desire mba?" Raihan teases and insinuates because I took out de sa han accidentally.

"I beg Rai, please finish Rai.me..!"

"Well you know what it's like to see a woman I love in her body full of kissmarks? I can do as ever even Surya mas do in the body mba," Raihan said as his hand lowered the clothes on my back.

My tongue feels stiff, I can only shake slowly begging Raihan to stop the action. However, Raihan did not want to stop it but pulled my clothes to show my twin mountains that were plastered in front of him. Raihan started playing it softly. Every now and then he bites his little shoots. I closed my eyes with mixed feelings. Likes, sadness and disappointment blend into one. In the state of eyes that closed my tears flowed so fast that Raihan saw my face that was filled with tears and stopped the action. He got up from my body and slumped his body on the floor.

When I felt that Raihan's body was no longer on top of me, I immediately confirmed my shirt back in a sobbing state. I felt like I wanted to curse Raihan who had treated me too far, to touch a part of my body that only my husband should be able to touch. Even though I know Raihan is in an emotional state.

But when I sat down, I found Raihan resting his face on both knees with trembling shoulders, Raihan was crying. This is the first time I've seen him cry. I paused my intention to scold her and instead I felt sorry and guilty for her. Is that how much Raihan loves me that he looks so frustrated?"

"Wheels...!"I said while holding her shoulder.

Raihan stopped his crying and looked up at his face without looking at me. Perhaps she was ashamed to have cried in front of a woman.

"Why does loving you hurt so much mba?" his words arrived.

"It hurts so much...!"continued again.

"Rai I'm sorry...!"

"No need to apologize mba, I was wrong. I'm the one who should be apologizing because I love mba so much that I can't control my emotions.

"Wheels..!"

"I'm sorry mba, I've touched the body part mba that should only be mas Surya who has the right to touch. I'm sorry mba, I shouldn't be like that to mba."

"If only you had expressed your feelings for me, maybe the story wasn't like this Rai." I muttered while remembering the past.

Raihan turned to me and asked, "What if I used to express my feelings to mba, would you accept me who is just a high school boy?"

"At least I'll hang on waiting for you until you're ready to marry me Rai."

Raihan sighed then turned his face up to the sky. Maybe he regretted why he didn't express his feelings to me.