Because, I Love You
Episode 160's

Without knocking on the door I opened the door and entered Irgy's private room. Then Irgy was surprised, aghast opened her eyes wide to see me coming.

"Darling..."

"Why? Are you surprised or disturbed by my arrival?" Answer me cetus.

Irgy fell silent later. Makes me feel like I just want to grab it, why is he actually silent with my reticence.

"When did you shut up, huh? Did you intentionally make me think worse of you Irgy. Is a week not enough for you to think how you're gonna explain it to me? But you are indifferent and rarely go home. You broke my heart, Irgy.."

"I'm sorry Fanny."

"Is that the only word you can say, huh?"

"I don't know where to explain all this. I, I'm afraid to start in front of you. I don't want you to leave me, I don't want you to think of me as much as your men before her."

I smiled wryly without looking at him one bit.

"In fact, you're just like them Irgy."

"No Fanny, please don't you equate me with them. It's just a misunderstanding, my friends are just exaggerating in front of you. They do like to advocate, but this isn't what you think."

"How about Hana? Is she really the first woman you've loved all this time? Were you guys really that romantic? Say it !!!"

I peaked, yelling at him loudly. Until my voice smothered my neck, it was fortunate that Irgy's private room was in a soundproof design. If not, we would have been a spectacle.

"We, we're just close and supportive of each other. Even I don't know if our relationship at that time was a couple or not, so I don't want to consider it a story in the past."

"But you love her Irgy, you've been in love with Hana in your past. You've also done everything to make her happy, so what's the difference?"

"But I never thought of us as lovers, we were just close."

"You think I'm stupid? I can read from all your riled up attitude when I was nearby that night. How he looks at you, how he smiles at you, how he still shakes when he says in front of you, and I see it all happening to you. You're a big liar Irgy, you're a traitor."

My cry broke out in front of Irgy, until my breath was suffocated by the cry I was unable to clear everything.

"I'm sorry Fanny."

"Stop apologizing, stop feeling guilty, late Irgy. It's too late, how you've been so heartfelt with me that you've trusted you wholeheartedly. I'm such a fool, trusting you is completely sincere and won't be swayed by anything. But I was wrong, I was wrong..."

"Fanny, please don't think like this. I was wrong I was wrong, I was wrong. I've never been honest and told you about Hana before, because I thought we really would never see each other again." Clearly Irgy came up to me, hugging me gently.

"Don't touch me, don't act like I'm being selfish. Was it my fault for behaving like this? Am I wrong huh?" I thrashed and encouraged her to release me from her embrace.

"No, you're not wrong. You have every right to be angry, you have every right to say you have the right to curse me, or if you need to slap me as much as you do Fanny. Do, do. But please don't ever hate me and leave me, I just love you now and until then."

"Bohooong, you're lying. You never really loved me, you.. You're a jerk, you're the same as everyone else. You're the same as them..."

"No, please don't ever judge me the same as her, I don't want to. I'll never be the same as they treat you, not Fanny."

Back Irgy forced me to keep hugging me no matter I beat her, no matter how many times I had bitten her so as not to fall in her arms.

"You know Irgy, every bad story I've told you in the past without a single cover. I am a despicable woman, I am a filthy woman, you marry a woman who has been tarnished with her honor. But do you believe when you say it out loud, if only I make your heart shake, if only I can make you feel the beauty of love, if only me, if only me, me and I changed all the colors of your life in love. I feel like the luckiest woman in the world is Irgy, but you're actually..."

"Fanny, for god's sake. I never considered Hana my lover even though I loved her first."

Jleb !!!

You don't know what it's like to have a heart shot by a wind sniper, do you? Instantly pierced right and quickly hit the recesses of my heart. It's very painful, very painful. Until it feels like my two legs no longer feel the earth's tread at this time.

"You're late to admit it right now Irgy, I've seen it myself without hearing it straight from your mouth. It just keeps getting my old wounds scratched back. Selfish, isn't it, I'm this?" I answered by looking at Irgy's face this time standing before me, my tears were already dry. My voice is raspy...

"No dear, no.. You're not selfish. You deserve to be like this, I'm wrong, I'm making you feel traumatized. But believe me, right now and forever I'll never love another woman besides you Fanny."

"Don't keep talking like you really understand my past trauma, don't ever talk you'll just love me. In fact you've shaken Irgy, just by Hana's presence that night. I'm not a good and perfect woman like Hana, but have you ever thought about how I tried to be the best even though I've been tarnished in the past, I told you honestly. I don't want you getting hurt and uncomfortable when my bad stories are heard from other people."

"Dear, enough. Don't always feel like a woman doesn't deserve me. Just you, just you Fanny. You're a great woman, you're a strong woman, you're amazing."

"No, I'm just a dirty woman. Many times I've been stuck in the past, but have you ever seen how I've tried to stand firm with my love for you Irgy. And you choose to be quiet without saying anything before, if only... If only, you would dare to tell the story of your past with Hana. I wouldn't feel like the dumbest woman in the world."

"I'm sorry and I'm sorry to all my friends Fanny, I promise I won't be at the reunion. I promise from this moment on I will try to be an honest man and always be open to you dear. I promise, hem... But please never hate and leave me."

"For so long, I never thought you'd let me down like this Irgy. You're my husband, you've always admired me, you've always admired me, you've always praised me in my heart. But you, what a cold-blooded killer. I think I've been dead since that night until now I have to meet Hana here."

"Ha,hana? In here?" Irgy was surprised by my words.

"Cih, you're even surprised to hear it's here. Do you want to see him again? You can chase him to the airport. And if you want to go after her to meet her last time, that's fine. I assume it's all over.."

"No no no no. I'll never walk away from you this second, even if it's just a little distance." Irgy replied as she kissed both of my hands in her arms nonstop from now on.

Then Irgy's phone rang that was lying on her desk. Irgy hesitated to reach for her phone, she looked at me uneasily.

"Why? Are you even afraid that I'll find out who you've been in contact with for the past few days, maybe you're busy with Hana?"

"Darling, how could you accuse me of being so bad. I'm really busy, the state of the office and the sales have decreased this month. I have to go overtime to get everything back to normal. Believe that... I just love you, my mind's fucked just thinking of you."

I re-clogged my lips, a thin sniff turned my gaze away from her. Then Irgy's phone rang again, this is the third time. Irgy clucked in annoyance, as if annoyed by the sound of the tone of her phone that kept ringing many times since earlier. Then he grabbed it and looked as if he stared for a moment by furrowing both eyebrows.

"Hello..." He answered when he had received a call on his cell phone since.

I don't know what or who but Irgy's facial expression turned irritated.

"Hana, we're done. Don't think of me like I used to, just live your life towards a better future. I want to live a quiet and happy life with my little family today, thank you for giving me the attention and advice that my wife has already done for me."

My blood was like a swish, the heat felt all over my body hearing and knowing who was behind the caller. Yeah, Hana Hana and Hana again. And even more surprised, when Irgy just closed her phone. Opening a card attached to his phone all this time, then Irgy broke it to pieces. He slammed his phone against the wall, shattered.

Is this the true side of my husband all this time??? Oh, my God, he's unmitigated to slam a cell phone I know for tens of millions. He split into pieces a card that he has been using with other important colleagues. He is destroying and willing to decide everything for what? For making me believe?

I'm disappointed Irgy, no longer angry with you... How I deal with this trauma-covered disappointment, it all feels so mercilessly upon me.