Being Married to My First Love
The Yarn of Ummi Aini
Since last night Fadhil has been moody. He was still thinking about Cindy's words. In his mind kept wondering who had influenced Cindy to cancel her sermon. However, Fadhil could not discuss it for now with his parents. Because there is a wife that he must take care of his feelings. He did not want his wife to misunderstand if she heard their debate later. Fadhil just wants everything to be clear. So that he can accept the reality.
"Mas, here's the coffee" Fadhil's wife said as she placed a cup of coffee on Fadhil's front desk.
"Thank you, Deck."
Fadhil sipped a glass of coffee made by his wife, slowly. Tia is the woman Fadhil has been married to for five months. Tia is a good wife and very obedient. Tia was also quite beautiful, yet she was rather quiet. Since marrying Tia, Fadhil has been trying to love her. However, it is not easy, because Fadhil still feels there is a strange in the heart.
Sometimes he suddenly dreamed as if back to the first time he admired Cindy in silence, which is when he often saw Cindy pick up his sister in the boarding school, also got a dream back in his ta'aruf period with Cindy, from there began Cindy occupy space in Fadhil's heart. And sometimes in his dreams he was in a boutique with Cindy and Ummi who were preparing his wedding dress with Cindy. Memories for his sweet memories with Cindy seemed to be twisted in his dream, but he never again met Cindy after.
His only desire was to know the reason for his sudden abrogation of the sermon. So that the tangled thread that stuck in his heart can be broken and he can sincerely accept the fact that fate does not bring them together in the sacred bond of marriage.
"Mas..., mas Fadhil!" the voice of his wife's call made him aware of his daydream.
"Sorry, Deck. It wasn't focused. What did Adek say?" ask Fadhil gently.
"If I may want to go to Mom's house, Mas. I miss a month of not seeing Mom," said Tia's wife Fadhil.
"Of course you can, Deck. Get ready, I'll take you," said Fadhil.
"Mas, Fadhil won't stay?" ask Tia.
"Mas's on business, Deck. If my business is done, Mas will come back after you. But if it's unresolved, you don't mind if Mas catches up with you tomorrow morning?" ask Fadhil to his wife.
"Yes, Mas. I will always wait for you, Mas," Tia smiled sweetly at her husband. Then he walked into the house to get ready.
After his wife died, Fadhil was saddened by his wife's obedience to him. He had a wife who was so sincere and loyal to him. However, Fadhil felt he could not fully love her.
After a while his wife returned. Fadhil then drove his wife to his father-in-law's house. From there Fadhil begged himself to teach in the pesantren. After dinner with his parents, Fadhil asked his brother and umminya to meet in the living room. Fadhil felt this was the right opportunity to talk to his parents about the issue of cancelling his sermon with Cindy.
"What are you talking about, Dhil?" ask ummi Aini.
"Change, Ummi, Fadhil just go straight to the point, please say honestly to Fadhil who of you wanted Fadhil's sermon with Cindy when it was canceled," Fadhil said firmly.
"What do you mean, Dhil. Didn't Cindy cancel it? abah.
"Why are you talking about it again, son. You already have a wife. Is it worth it if your wife hears you're still talking about another woman?" ummi Aini.
"Ummi, Fadhil didn't mean to betray Tia. Here Fadhil just wants to straighten out the misunderstanding between Fadhil and Cindy. All this time Fadhil felt something was up. Fadhil was prejudiced against Cindy. However, it turns out that Fadhil's prejudice is wrong. Cindy never betrayed Fadhil. But Cindy had other reasons she couldn't explain. So Fadhil please be honest with Fadhil who has asked Cindy to cancel my sermon!" fadhil said at length.
"Sir Abu, Bah. Yesterday Fadhil asked for an explanation from Cindy, but Cindy still did not want to say it. And it was Mr. Abu who said if the cancellation came from our family and asked Fadhil to find out for himself" said Fadhil.
"Astaghfirullahal'adzim, Abah cannot do that to you, Dhil. Abu and Abah have agreed to match you where Abah might do that," Ustadz Maulana denies if not himself, "Ummi, did Ummi do it?"
Ummi Aini who had been silent with sweat pouring was finally shocked when her husband asked her about it. She knew her husband was strict.
"I'm sorry, Ummi Fadhil. Please forgive Ummi!" ummi Aini.
"Astaghfirullahal'adhim, Ummi. What was Ummi thinking about doing that?" ustadz Maulana said with a trembling voice holding back anger.
"Ummi, isn't Fadhil a real child, Ummi? So, why would Ummi take away the happiness of Fadhil? Ummi knew the weight of Fadhil to go through the days after to be able to rise again. Fadhil's heart is broken, Ummi!" fadhil said with stifled emotions.
"I'm sorry Ummi, Fadhil. Ummi was wrong to separate you from Cindy. However, know Ummi did it for your own good, son," Ummi Aini tried to convince her son that he did nothing wrong.
"Which kind, Ummi? As long as Ummi knew Fadhil had been suffering. Fadhil's hopes were shattered all of a sudden. Fadhil can't even put Tia in Fadhil's heart because there are still oddities in the past that haven't been resolved. Especially with Cindy, what Ummi did not feel had wronged her by asking her to do that. I remember well when Cindy canceled her sermon back then, Cindy looked very sad, Ummi. I'm sure he was very hurt because, Ummi!" Fadhil vented all the unrest in his heart.
"Ummi regrets Fadhil, please forgive Ummi. Ummi was wrong. Ummi just...," ummi Aini did not continue her words. She did not want her husband and daughter to get angry.
"What's all, Ummi? What was the reason Ummi separated the two of them? Please say everything clearly no one is covered up!" ustadz Maulana said firmly.
"Ummi is only worried that Cindy can't have children because of her illness, Bah. Ummi desperately misses a little boy present in the midst of our family. All that ummi did for your future.!" ummi.
"Ummi even precedes God's destiny. A person's soul mate, age, and fate are arranged by God. Why Ummi as an ordinary man is presumptuous to oppose God's destiny. Ummi felt able to match God to set your own tadir son. Ummi is absolutely outrageous. Come to Cindy's family and apologize to them!" ustadz Maulana said out loud.
Ummi Aini immediately rested at the feet of her husband.
"Please Bah, forgive Ummi, Bah. Ummi didn't mean it that way, Ummi regretted doing that, Bah!" ummi continued to beg, "Fadhil forgive Ummi, Ummi was wrong but Ummi did that because Ummi loved this family too much!"
"Ummi has embarrassed me and smeared my face in front of their families. I have failed to educate my wife. Don't come to me before they forgive Ummi!" ustadz Maulana left their place right then and there by holding his chest that hurt.
"Relieve, Ummi. Fadhil was very disappointed with Ummi's actions. Fadhil will not be an ungodly child even though Ummi has destroyed Fadhil's happiness. Fadhil begs in the future Ummi not to be rash to hurt the hearts of those who love Ummi. Fadhil hopes Ummi can reflect on Ummi's mistakes!"
Fadhil also left Umminya, and chose to enter his room.
Ummi Aini sobbed alone lamenting his mistake.
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