Obsessive Love Disorder
A good sign or a bad sign?

A few weeks passed. After the incident at that time in the back lobby with Danu I no longer see Danu approaching me or sending misterus things again to me.

I once ran into him in the apartment lobby but he didn't look at me and just passed me by. I felt strange but I tried to let it go, because this is what I asked her to stay away from me and pretend not to know me. Maybe Danu tried to throw her feelings to me, eventually she really did even though you gkin would be difficult.

I was busy with my homework wiping all the dusty things. That day I put on a black tanktop and used hotpants to make me move. While Aditya has already left to finish his project.

I was enjoying a song in the player that was connected to the TV. So that the sound of music is so jarring with both home theater sounds. Then I saw my phone on the dining table. It was from Sienna he had tried to contact me several times, but the sound of my phone was not heard due to the mp3 noise in the room.

I turned off the music and picked up Sienna's phone.

“Hay Syen” greet me by sitting on the dining table chair.

“Lo where the hell is it? On the phonein hard bener” nagging her sounded annoyed.

“Sorry,gue again clean the apartment while listening to music. What's up?”

“Lo turn on TV now see TV channel 12” said Sienna made me curious.

I got straight down from the chair and took a remote over the living room sofa. I turned on the TV and searched channel 12. It was seen that Danu was singing at a big event that was held in Jakarta.

“Then? I have to watch her sing?” Ask me in wonder.

“Tv lo can playback right? Try lo playback first new song Danu and lo dengerin” pinta Sienna. And I did it by pressing the play back button to listen to Dany's new song from the start.

Not a day without thinking about you

(There are days without thinking about you)

You always on my mind

(You're always on my mind)

Even though that I know

(Even if I know)

You never think I exist

(You never thought I existed)

Trust me baby

(Trust me dear)

I'm still here for you

(I'm still here for you)

Even if you are happy with someone else

(Even if you're happy with the others)

I'm happy with your happiness

(I'm happy with your happiness)

With the man who makes you mean

(With someone who has made you mean something)

(Let my feelings stay like this)

Even if you won't think about it

(Even if you don't want it)

Let my feelings straw like this

(Let my feelings flare up like this)

Even if you won't understand

(Even if you don't understand)

His instruments are so delicate and soothing. The song is so touching. Anyone who heard this song would feel carried away with his song, and they would feel his pain.

Then I turned off the tv while continuing to stare blankly at the dark tv screen.

“Lo's mind must be the same as me?” Guess Sienna after not hearing me comment after I played Danu's song.

“Yes I don't care. That's for me cake, for someone else or for anyone it's not my business” said I was so convincing but the fact I felt my heart was filled to hear the lyrics sung Danu. But I have to try not to acknowledge that, because I really shouldn't think about it.

“Iya I just tell you lo aja Dheb” said Sienna feeling guilty for hearing my tone that was getting upset.

“Iya it’s Ok. Yes I have continued to finish ya” said I ended my conversation with Sienna.

“OK. When do we meet?” Ask Sienna before I hang up.

“Cap yes? I can do it anytime, asal says same Aditya”

“It is, you must definitely ask permission from your husband. But before married also Aditya did ask you to make permission if where to go, right?” Ledek Sienna recalled the time I had with Aditya who always had to report when going to hangout with them.

Makes me and Sienna laugh.

“Ya consider it a simulation times Syen”

“Ya. Let us know if we want to go out”

“OK”

“Bye Dheb”

“Bye Syen”

I closed the phone as soon as my face turned back moody. Looking at the TV screen that just aired Danu and her new song made me feel full and uncomfortable. I felt like the song was for me, he was trying hard not to bother me anymore,he had complied with my desire to no longer know each other but why did I feel so bad. I feel guilty for hating him.

I tried to throw my mind away and focus on my work again. And when I went back to dusting all of a sudden I kept sneezing and started to feel dizzy. Because since yesterday my body feels bad and suddenly always dizzy. I sat down on the couch to rest my body and calm my mind.

I think it's because I'm too tired to do activities at home so excited. I worked too much and ate a lot of unhealthy food while in the apartment. Maybe that's why I'm always tired.

I remember the pills I didn't eat in a week. It was a pregnancy-preventing drug that I always ate every night after my wedding. I had indeed agreed with Aditya to delay our pregnancy until the moment Aditya was ready. And I still have the desire to travel around Indonesia with Aditya before we have children. But after her walk I no longer ate the pill because I always felt cramping in my stomach and always making it hurt. And besides that I've been very anxious to feel how to be a mother, but I haven't said this to Aditya for fear that she'll be angry and she's still not ready.

Am I pregnant?

This fast?

Ask me in my heart. Now that thought starts to bother me. I'm not sure if I'm pregnant or not. But I always think positive, all I experience is fatigue and I lack nutrition. There are no signs of nausea or morning sickness like what I read in the pregnancy article.