Rai Universe
CHAPTER 84. A Pile of Hope That Still Has No Clarity.
Akash takes Esta back to Semarang. The man reasoned that he had business around Semarang and all of you drove Esta home. But that's just the reason.
“So chat what is the same Mas Oza?” Search Akash again.
“She just I've got a girlfriend has not.” Esta answered honestly.
“Keep answering what?!” Akash. From the look on his face, he seemed to dislike Oza's question.
“Yes I answered honestly lah.”
“Keep she said what?” Urge Akash again.
“Do not worry. He just asked that.”
Akash breathed a sigh of relief. He put his back on the chair. The man seemed to be smiling faintly.
“Ta..”
“Hem?”
“Sorry if I talk about Rai. I just don't want you to misunderstand me and think I deliberately hid him from you. During this time we have actually broken contact.” Akash. He wants to correct that misunderstanding. He kept remembering Esta's pajamas look at him.
“I know. I trust you.”
“Thank God. I think you misunderstood me.”
Esta smiled at Akash.
I don't know. He didn't want to talk about the guy. He didn't want to take it. It will only make his heart wobble. He was determined to open his heart to anyone who came later. Unfortunately, he still cannot open his heart to Akash.
Esta would not be able to accept Akash's feelings. Given how close it had to do with Rai first. If he opened his heart to the man, it would only make his heart hurt from the memories of the past. And he won't be able to stick with Akash for very long.
“You eat first, no?” Tawar Akash broke the silence while in the middle of the journey.
“Bby.”
“What do you eat?”
“They're on the side of the road. Let's not bother.”
“Din, stop by to eat first.” Akash orders his manager who is driving the car.
“Iya, Mas. Where to eat?” Ask Edin.
“That's in the stall. Like rame.” Appoint Akash in a roadside tent not far from them.
Edin stopped his car in front of the goat satay stall. Esta and Akash then go down, as do Edin.
Edin ordered three servings of goat satay for them. After that he joined together with Esta and Akash who had sat down first.
Not long after that their order arrived. They just gobbled it up while interspersed with small talk.
“What's tomorrow until you rush home?” Akash started the conversation.
“Oh, same meeting app developer.”
“Application developer?”
“Hem. I want an app for the Laundry Universe. Let's reach even further.”
“Waahhh. Turns out your brain is diluted now too. It used to be less said the capacity is not enough.” Ejek Akash's.
Akashpun laughed.
“You, there is no intention to return to Jakarta, so?” Akash's question made Esta stop her eating. He looked at the man inside and then shook his head.
“Jakarta is full of painful teenage memories for me. If I can't get there now. But don't know later.” Esta answered and continued eating.
And Akashpun became silent after hearing Esta's reply.
“Ta?” Call later.
“What?”
“Isn't it time you got out of the shadows of the past? When do you want to miss all that pain?”
“I also want to forget everything. I also don't want to keep going. But what the hell else? No matter how hard I make my heart forget, there is even more remember and more pain. I don't know how else to forget, Kash. If you know how, tell me.”
“Do not get angry. If I think you can't. But do not want to let go of all the good memories that exist between your pain.”
Is correct. Thas right. Esta admitted it even in her heart.
How can he give up all those wonderful memories that for others are nothing like that? That was the only good memory he had. How could he take his memories with Rai for granted? That was the only good memory he ever had.
“Hheemmpphh.” Esta just sighed. He put the last prick of the satellite into his mouth.
“You know that I'll still be there for you, right, Ta? At any time.” Pias Akash looked at Esta.
Esta nodded. He looked back at Akash. Ah, I really want to accept that man's feelings. Had it not been for his guilt, he would have accepted Akash with open arms.
“Still, Kash. It's always there for me. I don't know how to bales all your goodness.”
“As long as you're okay, that's more than enough for me. My goal is to see you happy, Ta.”
Ah, that's what makes Esta feel guilty. The feeling was like a heavy burden on his heart.
Esta continued to stare at Akash for some time. He no longer smiled. Just looked at the man deeply.
“Udah yuk.” Take Akash in the end. The man was running away from Esta's gaze which he did not like. Esta's such gaze seemed to judge him without any gaps. Makes her feelings shrink and shrink.
Akash immediately paid for their food. Edin got into the car and waited for the two passengers.
Edin returned his car to the road to the city of Semarang. This time, Esta chose to sleep because she was already sleepy. Today he was exhausted after accompanying Oza for a walk.
Akash also did not dare to disturb Esta who seemed to have fallen asleep. He took his jacket from the back of the front seat and then slipped it to Esta. He also tidied Esta's hair, which was broken into several strands to cover her face.
Staring at Esta's face like that, made Akash's heartbeat uncontrollable. He could feel his face already heating up due to the pounding of his heart.
Before he crossed the line, Akash immediately pulled his body back into position. He breathed many times to calm his heart.
Why did his feelings last this long for Esta? When can he replace Rai and give good memories to Esta?
Akash did not want to drag on in his hopes. He also decided to close his eyes.
“If you have said yes, Din. I'm going to sleep first.” The message to Edin.
“Iya, Mas. Just sleep. Later if I wake up in.” Edin replied while nodding and looking at the mirror through the dashboard.
Akash tried to fall asleep with a pile of hopes that still seemed to have no clarity. He never blamed Esta. He also never felt that Esta hung up his feelings. Because all Esta's attitudes are very firm about the boundaries between them. The woman never gave him any hope at all. Only he himself continues to hope for his feelings that will somehow materialize.