Way Back To You
Why Am I to Be Blamed?

“You okay?”

Hanna looked at Liam after they arrived home. Along the way home from the beach, Liam tends to be quiet, not trying to tease Hanna as usual. This actually makes Hanna worried because she is not used to her attitude. Liam did not say, his hands still tightly gripped the steering wheel.

Maybe he still needs time, Hanna murmured. Trying not to make a sound, Hanna opened her belt slowly. He looked back at Liam when he wanted to get down, but his hand opened the car door. He could not leave Liam with this condition. What if Liam was driving and he...Ah, naw. Why can I think of such a bad thing?

“You already know that Bobby's my cousin.”

Liam's heavy and low voice slightly made Hanna's guts shrink. He fixed his sitting position, then nodded slowly.

“And you didn't tell me back then? Why?” Liam looked at her so sharply that Hanna felt that her gaze was able to penetrate her body.

“I think we're not too close to discussing something more private.”

“What?”

Liam's face was very serious, and to be honest, Hanna was a little frightened to face Liam in this kind of situation. Hanna knew she was wrong, but she never expected that the mistake she considered was still within normal limits was simply intolerable by Liam. He thought, Liam wouldn't mind his lies, but it turned out that everything was beyond Hanna's expectations.

“Liam, I didn't mean to lie to you back then. I just don't think it's time that I..”.

“Then when is the right time?” Liam half-screamed, jerking Hanna until her whole body began to shake.

“If you tell me as soon as possible, I can definitely think of how to deal with Bobby. You know, how stupid I was when he got drunk in front of me and then raved about the woman he loved so much and I mocked him instead? I even told her what a good woman it was. Why do you think this is not important?”

Liam's tone tends to be fast, high and he's been ignited emotions. Hanna's heart was pounding very fast, her whole body was goosebumps and her body began to be fed by the heat which made it difficult for her to breathe. Hanna swallowed her saliva with great difficulty and tried to take her eyes off Liam's sharp gaze.

“I'm sorry.”

That apology was truly sincere from Hanna's heart. He just found out Liam and Bobby are so close like Brother Sister Blood. This situation must cause awkwardness between them and it is not impossible that this will make the distance of the two widen far.

“You said you had no intention of lying, in fact you did lie.” shouted Liam while hitting the wheel with his hand.

Hanna tried to catch her breath, and all of a sudden both of her eyelids started to glaze over. He was tired, his mind was scared. It's not his fault either why the two cousins love him, it's not his fault Bobby liked him so deeply for so many years, it's not his fault if they both don't know who Hanna is. Her only mistake was getting to know Liam and doing the forbidden thing with him until she became pregnant.

Liam snapped at him just because his cousin loved him and he didn't know about it. Hanna really had no intention of lying to him, why did she not understand as well? Why didn't he trust her and instead sparked a debate? Hanna's heart ached and was treated harshly by Liam, and the sound of her screaming made her want to cry.

“...my mistake is not as big and as bad as it makes you angry like this.”

The lump of tears she held back finally escaped also down her flushed face. “Do you think I was so wrong? I know you're like this because you don't know how to behave in front of Bobby, but do you have the right to yell at me? Even Mother who had desperately given birth to me, Father who desperately supported me greatly appreciated my feelings. I'm the mother of your son, but that doesn't mean you have the right to speak in that tone. If my presence makes your and Bobby's relationship broken, why don't you just walk out of my life? I don't need you.” Because from the beginning, I was planning to raise my baby without your intervention, and you were the one who came begging me. If you don't come, right now your relationship will be fine.

Hanna opened the car door, ignoring Liam who was trying to chase after her. Quickly –and with all her might Hanna closed the door of the house and locked it. He sat weakly and cried as he pleased.

Han, don't cry, pity the baby in your womb.

Hanna suggested to herself to stop, but her tears still fell. The clear lump is increasingly difficult to control, especially when the hormones of pregnancy contribute to the fight against her intentions. Hanna felt very low as Liam raised his voice.

Meanwhile Liam went back and forth in front of the door of Hanna's house, knocked –and pleaded. After seeing Hanna's tears fall right in front of her, Liam's heart immediately beat. He realized his mistake, but it was too late. It shouldn't be that she was angry like that at Hanna, because after she pulled the red thread of the matter back, she also played a role in it.

That night he intends to tell Bobby about his relationship and Hanna, but he breaks it down because he feels the time is not right. Doesn't that mean he's doing the same thing as Hanna? If she thinks Hanna's wrong, isn't she wrong too? Instead of being angry at Hanna, why wasn't she angry at herself? Instead of yelling at Hanna, why didn't she yell at herself?

“Han.forgive me. I.. I was wrong.forgive me.”

Liam begged for forgiveness. Just now that their relationship had improved a little, Hanna showed her comforting side with Liam throughout this one day. He allows Liam to touch her, allowing Liam to get close to her. Why did Liam destroy the effort Hanna had put in to repair their relationship?

There was no word from the inside, Hanna's house lights were also still out. Back Liam knocks, calling Hanna's name until she almost grimaces at feeling guilty –and also fears losing Hanna.

Hanna's right. It's not her fault if she and Bobby fall for the same woman. Liam could not blame Hanna's innocent yet evocative aura. He and Bobby are normal men, who like good and pure women like Hanna. Why did he blame Hanna? Where's Hanna's fault?

“Han, let's talk. I don't want this to affect our relationship. Please, I will not go home if this problem is not finished tonight also.”

There's still no word from inside Hanna's house. Liam tried to peek through the glass window of the house, but he could not see anything. Liam reached into his jacket pocket as his phone shook.

Go home, lest I see you in front of my house tonight and tomorrow. If you're still there, don't blame me if you can't see me again and also the baby in my womb.

Liam's reddened eyes held back the mixed emotions. He is worried not to play with Hanna's message which contains a threatening tone and Liam knows Hanna will not mess with her words. But this matter would obviously affect him before he finished it with Hanna. But again he could not force Hanna because it could be very fatal. She would definitely lose Hanna if she acted recklessly.

For his safety and his relationship, Liam chooses to use his logic and relents. He can wait until Hanna's emotions subside, and by then he can come back to persuade Hanna –even if she has to kneel Liam will do it. Right now Hanna is her world, and she will do whatever it takes to restore Hanna's smile and make up for her tears.