Mahram To Azira
Chapters 20.3

"All right, I'll go home by myself. I won't trouble Kenzie's mas." Smiling bitterly, Azira brought her limp feet out of the villa area.

His thin body was walking alone accompanied by a feeling of desolation that he had not felt for a long time. Almost.

"Where should I find a vehicle, there are no ojek or taxi here." Azira crazily looked at the streets.

But nil. This place is so quiet.

Azira is afraid of the dark, but more than that she is afraid of loneliness. It was as if the world had left him alone.

Walking far ahead, Azira occasionally rested by the side of the road while massaging her legs. After feeling well rested, he went back on his way. Sometimes he wants to call Sasa or Abah for help. But he remembers that Sasa was in the dorm and Abah accompanied Umi out of town to meet relatives.

Azira breathed a heavy sigh. He felt very tired and desperate at the same time. When he was about to completely give up, a taxi passed by on the street. In a hurry he waved his hand to stop the taxi. Luckily the taxi stopped and was still accepting passengers.

"Where are you going, mbak?"

"To the street xx." Azira said tired.

After sitting in the car, he was finally able to rest. Sitting leaning against the car seat, his eyes closed sifting through the memories of today. Starting from her husband's changed attitude, the incidence of Amara's allergies, to the angry expression of her husband. Azira remembers everything in inner torment.

For a moment, Meri's mocking words flashed inside her head.

".....Become substitute. Was fun? You married Kenzie after cheating on your own sister. But in marriage you are only treated as a substitute by Kenzie because the person he likes is not you, but Amara. First love...."

"....Surprised? Among the many girls known to Kenzie, you are the only woman who bears any resemblance to Amara. Your body shape.hum, just like Amara. You guys are like betel nut halved to look like each other. But for the point face, sorry Azira, I think personally Amara is much prettier than you. So when Amara comes home, you have to get ready to be kicked out of the house..."

These voices screamed loudly inside his head. Emphasizing to Azira that he is a surrogate, a replacement who sooner or later will be thrown away. She was no different from an item, used as a substitute and would be thrown away when Amara returned.

He is a substitute. A replacement!

"really?" Her pale lips whispered.

"Sir..mbak?"

Azira wakes.

"Why, sir?"

The taxi driver gave Azira a box of tissue in front.

Azira was surprised, why did the taxi driver give tissue?

"Son, cry if you want. You will not cry even if you cry hysterically. You understand it must hurt to be held down, so it's okay to cry harder." The driver said friendly.

Since getting into the car he noticed that this passenger was not doing well. His eyes were puffy because he was crying a lot and in the car he was still crying. Cry in silence without making a sound. How painful that is. The driver did not have a daughter but he understood a cry was a form of pain that could not be expressed in words. When someone has cried then it means that their pain is not stifled to the point of only being able to express it with a tear.

Azira stared blankly at the tissue box. Secretly, his hand took out the tissue box and quietly took out a piece of tissue to wipe his face.

"Thank you, sir." Bisik Azira thanks you.

"Together, Son."

The journey after this is traversed with silence. Azira never spoke again while her two eyes looked outwards, looking at the road with a monotonous view, nothing interesting, yet her eyes still wandered there.

A few minutes later, he finally arrived home. The house lights are on completely but Azira knows there is no one in the house. Umi and Abah are out of town, Sasa is in the dorm and her husband is still not back.

There was no car in front of her husband, so Azira knew that he had not returned.

"Thank you, sir." He smiled politely.

"Mbak, wait. Money is an advantage." The taxi driver hurriedly got out of the car and gave Azira some red sheets which Azira deliberately overdone.

"No, Sir. That's for dad. Please save it back."

The driver was astonished, sighed gently and smiled at Azira.

"Thank you, son. Hope everything goes well again and your problems are solved." Prayer sir sincere driver.

Azira smiled faintly. He silently secured it in his heart and rushed into the house.

Back home he immediately climbed upstairs without delay. Clean yourself and change clothes and pray alone. Staring at the screen of his phone, still nil, there was no response even from Kenzie.

Azira smiled bitterly. Tiredness today suddenly rained down on him when he touched the surface of the mattress. Weak, she lays herself in a mattress bag and soon falls asleep in the same nightmare.

This time he saw his mother being chased away by Dad when he came to visit the house. Mother's red eyes held back the cries but her voice remained firm and even her steps did not slow down.

Mother did not cry in front of little Azira but when alone, all the pain was shed in a mute cry.

"Mom... Mom, stop crying. Azira's here, Mom...Mum.." Azira called out in pain but no matter how much she cried out to her mother, the further she got away from her.

Azira was anxious and worried. He ran after his mother but further aggravated the distance between them.

"No, Ma...Ma!"

"Akh!" Azizah woke up from her sleep.

"It turns out it's just a dream." Azira sighed while adjusting her breathing.

"Mas Kenzie?" Azira called but there was no response.

Looking at the time on the phone, it was 3 in the morning but her husband was not in the room.

Azira thought her husband was in the library so she went looking for him there. Azira did not dare to enter the library and just stood alone at the door. Knocked several times but received no response from her husband.

Doubtfully, he timidly opened the library door.

Cclack

Not locked.

Azira's heart was pounding. He did not dare to enter and call from the opening of the door.

"Mass?" Call gently.

But there's no answer.

"Mas Kenzie?" Call him again.

"Mas Kenzie doesn't seem to be home yet." The scales of Azira are melancholic.

"If Kenzie didn't come home, then where is Kenzie now? Did she stay at the hospital accompanying Amara?" Where else if not there?

Azira smiled wryly. Weakly he returned to the room. There's no one here. All the luxurious furniture in this room could not get rid of the silent feeling that tormented his heart.

"Since Kenzie's mas isn't here, then I'll just pray the night alone. Count on talking to God so that my heart will not be restless."

Azira is not sleepy. After having a nightmare he did not dare to sleep. Fear that the dream is coming back. She saw her mother crying helplessly alone. Azira could not help but endure the pain in her heart.

...*****...

Azira felt her body getting weaker. He's not powered. Tired and tired at the same time. Maybe because the effect of walking too long last night so that his body becomes sore.

Azira got up early to clean the house. Sweep the backyard and water her husband's plants. More than 10 a.m., he was unable to move anymore and decided to rest in the room. As soon as he touched the bed, drowsiness instantly filled him. He fell asleep shortly afterwards.

*****

A gentle swipe swept across Azira's pale face. Disturbing his peaceful deep sleep. Azira moaned uncomfortably but the naughty hand never left her face.

Azira's trembling eyelids showed signs of waking up soon. A few seconds later the eyelids were raised, displaying a beautiful brown iris that was still entangled in drowsiness.

"Mass?" Azira stared blankly at the handsome face that was slowly growing closer.

Seeing her getting closer, Azira reflexively closed her eyes.

Cup

A brief kiss Azira felt on her lips.

Surprised, he spontaneously covered his mouth staring in disbelief at the owner of that handsome face. She thought she was dreaming of suddenly seeing her husband.

"Mas Kenzie's home?" There was sadness and anger in his voice.

He's ignored. He has been ignored. It feels very uncomfortable and painful.

"Sorry, did I wake you up." His voice apologized.

But his fingers still did not get out of Azira's face. He stroked Azira's face and even pinched the puffed cheek occasionally.

Azira looked at her old husband. All sorts of complaints began to fill his heart. Sickness and tightness, in the end he said nothing.

His face turned to look the other way. Fixing his sleeping position against Kenzie.

Kenzie. His hand that was playing the face of Azira now hangs empty. He lowered his hand. Staring within the slender back of his lonely-looking wife.

"The yesterday-"

Before he finished his speech, Azira immediately cut him off in a stifled rage.

"I never forced her to eat the dishes I made. I never made any offers but he himself wanted to eat my cooking! And I also didn't know that she was allergic to shrimp, if I knew, would I still go crazy asking her to eat shrimp? I'm not crazy, mom! I never forced him. The woman knew that Amara was allergic to shrimp but why did she let Amara eat the food! Wh why? Why would he accuse me of forcing Amara to eat shrimp? I don't understand at all. Besides of... Amara, she herself knew that shrimp was dangerous for her. She knows that she is allergic to shrimp and can't eat it but why is she still eating it?!" Azira reveals all her confusion to Kenzie.

He was saddened to have been slandered and he was so angry that Kenzie ignored him. Not only did he ignore it but Kenzie also refused to listen to his explanation. Azira is heartbroken. From last night he wondered if what Meri said that night was true?

Is he just Amara's replacement?

Now that Amara has returned here, is it possible that Kenzie will throw it away, like a piece of trash that has expired.

It's very painful.

"Azira, yesterday-trouble"

"Listen to me first, my mother!" Cut Azira hit by overflowing emotions.

I don't know what got into him. At first he could still hold back. Pretending nothing happened. But when she saw her husband was right here. All those emotions instantly gathered in his heart, urging to be released immediately until Azira finally vented what was buried in his heart.

Kenzie took a long breath.

"All right, I'll listen to you." Kenzie followed obediently.

"Mas Kenzie is the same as them. Not only did not want to listen to my explanation, but Kenzie instead yelled at me and left me alone. I'm not wrong, but you all blame me. I'm innocent, mas." As he spoke tears began to overflow from the corner of his eyes.

Azira did not want to cry but so it was very stubborn. These two annoying eyes constantly let out extremely irritating tears. Azira is upset but cannot control the tears that come out.

Waiting in silence, he thought Azira would speak again. But Azira did not continue her words. So Kenzie took the initiative to speak.

"Azira," Call Kenzie softly.

Azira closed her eyes not speaking anymore. He got up and got off the bed. Then without saying anything he walked out of the room. Kenzie was dumbfounded and hurriedly chased Azira out.

Azira did not care and continued to ignore her husband. He remembered yet to pray Zuhur so his feet stepped into the general mushola. Starting from taking ablution water to praying in the mushola, Kenzie always faithfully tailed it.

"My wife, let's talk." Call Kenzie softly to his wife.

Azira was still walking without any intention of stopping her steps let alone responding to her husband. He doesn't care.

"Azira, please listen to me." Kenzie couldn't help himself. He took Azira's hand and pulled her strong until she fell into his arms.

"Deliver!" Azira did not want to talk.

But Kenzie tightened his embrace. Not giving Azira a way to escape.

"Mas Kenzie.I'm trying to calm myself down so please.please leave me alone first." Azira also did not know.

There's something wrong with him. If he was angry, his anger would explode like a moment ago.

If she is upset, she will give a cold attitude to her husband.

And when you are sad, the sadness will continue to drag on until it is thought continuously.

His emotions are unstable. Azira knows but she can't control herself. He was confused by his emotional stability.

"Azira, please stop. I know you've been finding out about Amara recently. You may be jealous of Amara, but this is not how Azira works. He and I are the past. It has nothing to do with the present." The weak voice of Kenzie's weak plea left Azira in shock.