My CRUEL husband (S1&S2)
comfortable with torture

...Soundtrack//if only-saejong(gugudan)//...

...Can I just feel safe once, even if it's just one minute?...

...-mina-is...

    I walked slowly to the room, Pak Umar had led the astan mas to the room and laid the astan mas in the mattress.

"Thank you sir." said I lowered my head.

Mr. Umar nodded his head assenting"It is my duty to neng, is neng okay?"ask Mr. Umar to worry.

I nodded and forced these stiff lips to smile"I hope you won't tell this to the astan, "I pleaded and Umar nodded again,I hope Mr. Umar is the one who will always be able to help me here.

As much as Pak Umar I immediately took off Astan's shoes as well as his suit and tie.

I walked slowly while enduring the pain in my back and legs to the kitchen to pick up a basin and a medium-sized towel.

After the Astan mas clothes I opened with difficulty I also gently rubbed his body with the towel I wet earlier.

Astan seemed to be disturbed by my actions and then he turned around, I tried to turn back his body until he opened his eyes and looked angrily at me.

He sat up and held my face with a feeling"Akhh"I grimaced in pain, because Astan pressed right in the area of the former slap of the thugs.

He smiled wryly"You won't know what it's like to lose your only family" he said laughing but I could see the sadness there.

I know what it's like to lose, I've experienced it, so the guilt in my chest never runs out when I remember my father accidentally took Dyva's life.

"I raised him with great difficulty, I was willing to work hard so that he was happy, why do you think I worked so hard until now if not to make him happy,I want my sister's future to be assured but with the tenacity of that damn guy killing my sister, I can't take it for granted, I'm going to make her feel a sense of loss, it feels like suffering from the loss of someone we care about" said mas astan with a face full of sadness.

My tears can no longer hold, why is hearing it directly from Astan mas so painful?I feel so guilty.

"Look, you'll know what it's like, "it's not finished yet Astan said he's fallen out of bed.

My tears broke, I couldn't help it anymore, it was so painful not too long ago that I got the abuse and now I have to go back to remembering a very deep sense of guilt.

I still rubbed the body of Astan with a towel in my hand with tears"I'm sorry mas hyks, I'm sorry father hiks."I cried while apologizing.

I walked slowly to the kitchen to return the basin and dirty towels, I did not go straight back into the room, I felt fragile even to climb the stairs I could no longer.

"Hiks," I cried on the stairs.

Why is my life like this? no one would want to have a life like mine, no happiness at all.

I'm weary....

I'm weary...

And you won't know how tired I feel.

05.12 Am.

Tuk.

I felt a tremor in my body as Mas Astan kicked him a little hard.

I slowly opened my very heavy eyes"Sorry sir, I'm sorry, "I tried to get up but to sit I couldn't.

"Prepare water for me to take a shower, what are you doing all night until you're late to get up?"jak mas astan with a loud.

I'm getting weaker when yelled at like that"I'm sorry sir," I said

Mas astan clucked bitterly"Had I don't want a bad mood in the morning blind like this, quickly prepare the water," said mas astan again.

I nodded and tried to get up but still half standing I had already collapsed falling back down.

"Why you?"asked Astan astonished to see me fall weak in front of him.

I shook my head"No matter what, sir, maybe I wasn't fully aware yet."I said lethargic.

"Wait on!! What's with the bruise on your face?"ask the Astan who may be aware of the former slap of the thugs.

I hurriedly turned to look in the other direction"No matter what, sir, "my words tried to rise, there's no way I'm telling the truth, surely I was also the one who hit, because I had violated Astan's orders.

Please!!I should be able to stand up.

Srett..

Mas Astan pulled me up to fall on his lap"How dare yah speak to me but look in the other direction, has started great" he said pulled my face until now our faces face facing each other.

I tried to duck, not wanting Astan to see my broken face"Why is this?"tanya mas Astan pointed a little bit at the corner of my lips that turn blue.

I shook my head"It's all right, my God" I couldn't finish my words because Astan pressed the wound hard.

He laughed"You think I'm a newborn child? lie like that for what?quickly tell me honestly why?"tanya Mas Astan snapped right in front of my face.

My tears almost fell, Mina is strong,, Mina is strong,, don't cry,, please!!!

"I fell down the stairs, sir, so bruised like this, I'm afraid you'll be angry because I'm being careless" I said.

Mas Astan pushed me to the floor"Know still acting careless, quickly prepare water for my bath,"Astan's orders.

I painstakingly entered the bathroom and prepared water for the Astan bath.

I felt so exhausted today, my head was dizzy and my entire joints were as numb.

I walked slowly down the stairs and walked towards the kitchen to cook"Akhh."my head just got sicker, really dizzy.

"Dini!!"I hear a voice from above, mini?did Astan call me?my name is Mina is not mini, this is the first time I heard the voice of Astan calling my name even though it was wrong.

I walked slowly to the room"What's the matter, sir?can I help you?"many weak.

"Guild me a tie," he said arriving.

I panicked myself to hear the words of Astan, I don't know how to tie a tie like that.

"A, you lord, forgive me sir, I have never tied a tie like that," I said fearfully.

"So you refused?wahhh dares very well." said Mas Astan again with his hard insinuations.

I shook my head"No sir, I just, well, sir I'll try." I said trying to approach Mas Astan.

I tried to reach for the tie but it was very difficult because the body of Astan's very tall body was different from mine which was only the size of passing the waist of Astan.

"Sorry sir, I can't take it." I said in fear

Mas Astan clucked"Eat him so do not mini people, your name is a mini, gimana ngk mini gini," he said as if mocking.

"Sorry sir, my name is Mina, not mini." I can't accept of course if my name arrives he has changed it to mini.

"For me you're a mini of your body size it's already seen it's your name" he said with a flat face.

I just kept quiet, I didn't dare to answer exactly"How about this sir, I still can't reach for it." I was afraid of fear.

And unexpectedly the astan again made something strange in me shake as the astan mas lowered its head and brought its face closer to me so I could grab the tie.

I got nervous for no reason, looked the other way and gulped a lot of times"Sa, I can't sir, I'm sorry," I gave up on the tie.

He's clucking"Basar stupid girl, tie a tie just not so nice, use a little," said mas astan pushed me to bounce off the bed.

"Akhh." I grimaced as my back that was rubbed against the asphalt yesterday hit the mattress.

I held my back in tears"Why are you really?"ask mas astan again astonished to see me.

I shook my head"No matter what, sir," I said again acting like nothing had happened.

Mas astan came closer to me"You do not realize that your lying ability is very bad?so before I get angry tell me the truth, what were you doing all night?as I recall yesterday you did not have that wound," asked the astan with great emphasis.

I was trembling in fear"I said the truth sir, I fell down the stairs until I was wounded like this, "I tried to get up but Astan sat me back on his bed,does he mind if I sit here?he could be angry again.

"Reverse now!"astan's mas order.

"Huh?"I was astonished, though

"Stupid!!turn now!"astan's orders slightly pinched my forehead.

I hesitantly turned my back to the astan mas, how about he get angry because I turned his back?.

Srek..

I felt my back shirt lift up"Tu, sir," I said in a brick.

I can catch a shocked expression of astan while looking at my back"You're sure that you just fell down the stairs?"ask astan suspiciously.

I nodded in doubt"Yes, sir, I fell down the stairs yesterday" I said

"Akhh, I'm grimacing" as the astan mass touched the wound on my back"How could falling down the stairs of his wound be this severe?"wonder about astan.

I became deg with fear how if the Astan mas more suspicious and will force me to open my voice, I can not be found out out of the house no matter how it is.

Mast Astan carries a p3k box and sits on a mattress.

He lifted my shirt back up and started polishing Betadine on my wound, I endured the pain as it hurt.

Again my tears without cause came out, I did not understand the astan, I was not used to it when he behaved this way.

"Ma, sir, you can be late, I can treat my wounds later, sir" I said trying to neutralize my voice so as not to sound like I was crying.

He did not answer and instead continued to treat my wounds, I bit my lips withholding my tears, why does it feel so tight?I'm not used to being noticed like this by astan mas.

"Stop crying, all night you can hold it, why when I treat you crying?"I mean, Astan made me want to cry even more.

"Sorry sir, it's so painful that I want to cry hyss," I said trying to hold back my tears from falling.

Mas Astan did not budge anymore and still continued to treat the wound.

I don't understand Astan's very confused attitude.

If he hates me so much, never make me feel so comfortable, I feel tormented.

...//Connected//...

...✳️✳️✳️✳️...

Astan is the definition of a man without a heart.

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