Lies
Are You Sorry?

You forget everything. He also forgot the existence of Farraz in his life, including the promises they used to not be remembered by Raya. He had lived his own life and never once came to visit Farraz who languished behind bars to bear his deeds. However, the process of Raya to rearrange her life is also not easy. He repeatedly felt depressed about something. It is overshadowed by terrible things that even carry dreams.

The problem is, Raya doesn't remember what happened to her anymore. As soon as he woke up after having that nightmare, he had no idea what he had dreamed last night. All he knew was that his body was already drenched in sweat and his hands were shaking violently. His heart was pounding and something made his breath sting. There are even things that Raya always does after waking up. He cleaned his hands several times.

It was done unconsciously, as it had been formed in his own subconscious that his hands were so dirty that he had to be cleaned immediately even though he himself did not see any stains on his hands. This was so strange that Raya told the aunt about the matter. Instead of giving an answer to Raya's cause of doing that, the aunt said it was a good thing. Keeping clean after and before bed is a commendable act.

But the strangest thing was when Raya always felt that something was missing from her life. It was like forgetting something very important. Something he should not forget at any time. Unfortunately even though it has been forced repeatedly, Raya still does not remember anything. In the end, Raya gave up on digging up her memories and decided to live as the current Kingdom. A world that does not depend on the past.

*****

(Return to the present)

“That's what happened. After you sent me a letter, I decided to hide it from Raya. Hiding yourself and your horrible past. I know you've been through a terrible time replacing Raya as a suspect, but I also want to try to protect my niece.” Bibi Raya tells Karan about what happened to Raya and the reason why the woman never visited Karan when he was still named Farraz in prison.

In the waiting room of the hospital visitor, Karan looked at the face of Aunt Raya. “But why didn't you deliver my letters to Raya? Or at least one letter from me? You have to know what I went through in prison was difficult. I was tormented but I tried to keep my mouth shut because I wanted Raya not to get involved in the matter. All I want is one. At least let me see Raya. Or at least let me get information about the woman I love. That's not what I can get.”

Karan still imagined how cold the prison floor and the pain was behind bars. Especially for poor young people. Every day, Karan looks forward to the prison guards going around hoping that Farraz's name will be mentioned by him. Karan hoped that there would be people visiting him in that despicable place. However, the more Karan hoped, the more his heart ached as well.

No one visited any of them in his place. The other prisoners were always visited by relatives and friends, but no one wanted to go to an orphan named Farraz. It made the wound in Karan's heart even more gaping. Especially for what Karan felt during his time in prison which until now gave a tremendous sense of trauma to him.

Karan grinned. With a glare of her eyes, she looked at Aunt Raya. “Easy once you say that. Had I not replaced Raya in prison, it would have been Raya who would have experienced what I experienced. When that happens, I make sure your nephew will definitely not survive at all.”

Auntie Raya exhaled a long breath. “So, do you regret replacing Raya? Is this why you tortured that woman until she had to endure this much pressure? Remember Farraz .. ah no. You've changed your name to Karan Reviano, although the renaming won't change who you really are. Raya lost a child. But it's not only his son, but also your son.”

Karan knows how much of a bitch he's been to Raya. His rude attitude makes the wife so filled with inner pressure. Lying that Raya is happy living with him. If given the opportunity, Raya would have escaped from her embrace. She did it once at the beginning of their marriage. It was certain that he wanted to do that at every opportunity had Karan not tightened the guard against Raya.

It is true that Karan's goal to marry Raya was only to avenge her 12 years ago. He couldn't do that when he was Farraz. His life is still very poor and helpless. However, after being renamed as Karan Reviano, everything was inversely proportional. Only by using his exit name can Karan do anything and master what he wants.

Unfortunately, there was not a single plan that Karan put together to injure Raya. He just wants to tie the woman to marriage and make her realize that no one can save Raya other than Karan. And in his plan there was no child either. Karan never thought there would be a baby in the middle of their lives when Karan was about to take revenge. The desire to have a child only appeared later when his relationship with Raya had improved. It was also with the reason to bind Raya so as not to run away from her. The child is the most powerful weapon to hold the Kingdom to always be by his side.

But now, it's too late. Despite wanting to explain anything about his self-righteousness, Karan remains the bad guy at fault in the case. He should not have forgiveness. But, if possible, he wanted to visit his wife and reveal whatever was in her heart. Karan wants to apologize, regardless of whether Raya forgives or not, Karan will not force the woman.

“I know, I am also guilty of Raya. But I did not want the death of our baby. Maybe this sounds like a hypocritical statement, but I really did not know that Raya was pregnant that day.”

Karan showed a face full of regret unfortunately even made the aunt feel more upset. “What will you do when you know Raya is pregnant? It won't make any difference, Karan. Never mind, forget about Raya. You've already sent the divorce papers and it's been signed by Raya. If you are truly sorry for what you did, I hope you no longer come to disturb him,”.

Shortly after, he got up from his chair and stepped away from Karan. It is not good to be close to the man because it can shake his feelings. Because it is undeniable that he feels compassion for Karan even though the percentage is very little. However, he felt guilty towards Karan in the past. He should not have thrown away all the letters that the man had delivered to Raya. Or he should have come to visit Karan in prison as a representative of his nephew. Unfortunately, what was done was just the opposite. Not even a letter was ever sent to the man whose real name was Farraz.