Sincerity of Heart 2
Chapter 60. I won't give you the slightest gap (Alan)

I never hesitate to love you, in the depths of my heart I always say that. Believe it or not, that's the truth. Love does not have a physical, but can be felt in its presence.

~Heart Graduation 2~

I laid my body on the bed, it felt really upset. I was confused, why my heart was so upset when I found out who the woman Prof loved. Luis. Why haven't I realized since. Profs. Luis, by suddenly asking about my wife, you idiot. Ara. Why didn't he say anything about the meeting either. Did something happen that he didn't want to say.

I turned my body around when I felt the bed I was sleeping on was slightly swaying. I'm speechless. Angrier. The emotions within me began to stir. How could he hide all this from me? Does she still think I'm her husband?

"Bi. Ara apologized," he said apologizing. I'm staying quiet. The anger is still lodged in my heart.

I felt my back warm. His touch made my blood rustle violently. I close my eyes, I don't want my emotions to control me.

"Ara knows hubby's mad, Ara's sorry. Ara didn't mean to hide all that. Ara just doesn't want hubby to misunderstand," he said in a sad tone. I woke up from my sleep and headed towards the sofa.

"Even if you're hiding all this, you're misunderstanding, do you know? Profs. Luis, say if he likes a woman. And it turns out it was you, did he say anything to you back then?" I asked fiercely. I was really upset, why did he say that I would misunderstand. I prefer honesty, I knew long ago that she was an honest woman. I don't know why he hid all this from me.

"Fra... Ara is afraid to say this to hubby, Ara is afraid that hubby does not believe Ara's words. Anyway Prof. Luis is hubby's great teacher, Ara doesn't want you to misunderstand." he explained. My heart is not satisfied with the answer.

"So you doubt my belief Ara?" tanyaku. I'm really in a rasuki rage. I looked at him sharply, he just looked down. Does he doubt my love? I trust him so much. We promised to be open to each other. Butwhat? He hid such a fatal thing. All this time Prof. Luis, save a heart for my own wife. How could this possibly happen?

"You let me down, Ara," I said as I left.

"Hubby, Ara, I'm sorry. Ara knew, Ara was wrong." she pulled my hand. I stopped my steps, but still turned my back.

"Please don't go. Pardon Ara, Ara was really afraid that hubby would misunderstand if Ara were to come clean. Ara apologize bi."

I closed my eyes as he hugged me. I could hear from his lips clearly. I was already disappointed, he had doubted the love and trust that I had been guarding.

"I never hesitate to love you, in the depths of my heart I always say that. Believe it or not, that's the truth. Love does not have a physical, but can be felt in its presence. I thought you realized it was Ara."

"I'm disappointed, Ara. Even you don't trust me. I can't imagine what if I told Prof at the time. Luis, if he has to fight for his love. Maybe he'll try to take you away from me, "I let go of his hand that's coiled around my stomach. I stepped away leaving her. I don't know, I'm so upset. If I stay here, I'm afraid I'll hurt him.

Maybe, if someone else likes my wife. I won't be this angry, but this time the one who loves my wife is someone I admire so much. The teacher I was always proud of. My heart hurts so much. There are so many women out there, why my wife? Akhhhh, my head seems to want to break.

I rested my head on the door, my disappointment was huge. I am angry, hate the current situation. I left my home with a raging heart. I want to win my mind for a moment.

My steps came to a halt right in front of a cafe, rushing me in. I sat not far from the entrance, ordered a cup of coffee to calm my mind. I don't really like coffee very much, but right now I suddenly want it.

After my mind calmed down a bit, I rushed to go home. In the middle of the road, suddenly my hand was pulled by someone. I was so shocked, I quickly pulled my hand.

"Follow me, there's something I want to say." Jane walked ahead of me no matter if I agreed or not. I stared at his back, lazily following him from behind.

"What do you want to talk about?" I asked when we were in a cottage, not far from where I live.

"I don't mean to interfere in your household affairs Lan, don't be mad at Ara. He knew nothing, I was with him. He looked scared" Jane said. I looked at him fixedly.

"I know you're jealous, but remember. Your wife is pregnant, it is not good if this problem continues to drag on. Ara's a loyal woman, you know that, right? Get your upset, I'm a woman. I know how your wife feels, believe me. He had his own reasons why he was hiding everything."

I'm speechless. My anger has disappeared. It's just that my annoyance is still lodged. I was just disappointed, disappointed that he wasn't honest with me.

I looked at him again. Then I hurried to leave him.

I entered the house with slow steps. Then I rushed to the room. I want to know what my wife is doing. I opened the door carefully.

My heart sank as I watched my wife fall asleep on the couch with wet eyes. I knew she was crying. I sat down to look at his face closer. I kissed her slowly, so she wouldn't wake up. I wiped her tears that were still running down her cheeks.

"I'm sorry honey, I didn't mean to make you sad. I'm just jealous, I'm afraid of losing you. Really scared of Ara," I said.

My eyes are now on his stomach which is starting to look bloated. I'm a gentle kiss. I rub it slowly.

"Listen darling, don't be mad at abi for making your umi cry. Abi is just disappointed baby, abi doesn't want to lose you guys. Abi loves you more than anything." I kissed her stomach gently. I looked back at the face that never changed. A face full of peace.

I slowly lifted her up, laid her on the bed. It seemed like he was really tired, not even a hint of flinching. I pulled out a blanket to cover her body.

I kept looking at his face closer. My eyes refused to move from there. Everything he has I like him a lot. I don't want it to feel like someone else is looking at it. I don't like that.

I got up from the bed, walked lazily towards the kitchen. My stomach is hungry again, I open the refrigerator door. I wish there was something I could eat. That afternoon Ara did not cook, because I forbade it. Thankfully, there are some apples. I took it and washed it. I sat at the dinner table and watched the snow fall from the window.

I miss my hometown so much. Especially my mom, I miss her so much. My mother's attitude and treatment were so sweet. Ah, Miss you mom.

I remember about Prof. Luis, what if I get back to him. Can I keep my attitude? Must be very awkward. The world is so narrow. So many women, why my wife? The question kept ringing in my head. I know loving someone is not wrong. It's just, it's too painful. A man I admire so much, I respect. Loving my woman. It really hurts. Even he so frankly told me the truth. Stupid me, unaware of all that. I hope he can get a good woman and quickly forget my wife.

In a few days I'll do a trial. I have to control myself to keep acting as usual. Anyway, he is still my teacher. Even if it's a little awkward, I'll still try to be professional. After my graduation day, I'll take my wife home. Too long here doesn't seem too good. Sorry Prof. I will not give you the slightest gap to get close to what is already mine.

I glanced at my watch. Soon it'll be ashar time, I think I should wake my wife up. I got up from my seat, rushed to my room.