I'm Just a Figurant
Ch 11 - Why So Worried About Me?

I was stunned to hear Alex's confession. I really didn't expect my words would hurt Alex that much. I also didn't expect Alex to really sincerely want to be friends with me. I feel like I've done very badly.

But I had to do it. I don't want Alex and Diana's relationship to break down. I know Alex loves and loves Diana. It was very noticeable from his treatment of Diana.

Alex's intentions are sincerely to be friends with me. But I am not sincere towards him. I have feelings for him. No friendship/friendship between a man and a woman is true. One of them will definitely have more feelings towards each other and that is him.

Alex has been with me for a while. My body started to stiffen from acting dead. My hands and feet started to tingle. I'm starting to take it no longer...

"Lex, Alex.." a boy's voice called out.

"What Din?"

"Pak Riswan nyariin You. Turned you off to run." Yeah."

"Oh so..."

"What's 'oh so'? Yuk. Hunting Mr. Riswan furiously undaunted."

Alex seemed to be heavy-hearted, either wanting to leave me or not.

"Khansa, I ran away first. Finish running I'm here again."

"How good are you to be with him? If Diana knew, she'd be jealous." Said my classmate named Dino.

"Khansa. Bodo is Diana jealous. It means Diana doesn't believe my feelings. Yuk run away."

The two men disappeared from the UKS. Makes me breathe easy. I try to sit. Put a compress on my forehead and hold the compress on my stomach.

"Are you feeling better?"

"Dude!"

"Why?"

"Dook off Doc."

"Shocked why? You think I'm that guy?"

"Ehem." My cheeks are red.

"But you're so lucky. What's yourname?" Doctor Nina read the name on my uniform. "Khansa yes... Khansa, you're very lucky. You can make a guy as popular as that worry about you. He must have feelings for you."

"Doctor said what. We're just friends Doc. No more than that. Alex has a girlfriend. And her boyfriend's the goddess at this school."

"Yes, yeah. I know it. I know that popular couple. But it's just weird. Why is he so concerned about you? You know, he was carrying you here. His face looked very panicked and worried. He instead suggested calling an ambulance because he felt I would not be able to handle your illness. It's weird to see her attitude like that but she doesn't have feelings for you." Doctor Nina seemed to think.

"Not strange Doc. That's because we're friends. His worries are because it's purely our friendship." I'm trying to refute. Hearing doctor Nina tell me about Alex made my heart beat. Alex took me to the UKS? Is Alex worried about me?

"Oh, that's your business, young man. Oh yeah by the way, you get sick like this every month?"

"yes Doc. Why is it Doc? Is there something wrong with my cycle?"

"Feeding pattern. Do not drink ice often. Drink warm water often. And when the pain arrives, compress your stomach with warm water. Don't be too stressed, okay?"

"OK Doc. Then excuse me Doc."

"Where are you going? You don't want to wait for your heart to come?"

"No-no Doc. I'm going to class." I have to hurry before Alex comes. It would be a shame to meet Alex in such a situation.

Doctor Nina gave me a sick letter. That letter I can use for a quick home permit. Unbeknownst to Alex I came home early that day. I decided to leave my bike at school and ride in an angkot.

Actually my stomach doesn't hurt that much anymore. I can continue the next lesson hours. But embarrassed to face Alex again, I decided to go home quickly.

***

Once I got home, I immediately rested in the room. Dad hasn't come home from work. My sister hasn't been to school either. Time still shows at ten in the morning.

I threw myself down and remembered the flashback of what happened that day. My brain keeps wondering. Why is Alex so nice to me? Why would Alex want to make me his best friend? What have I done to such an opinion of attention?

Various thoughts raged in my brain. Those thoughts sent me to dreamland. I fell asleep dreaming of Alex. There was no Diana in my dreams. Just me and Alex. Us two. How wonderful.

I woke up when I heard someone knocking on my house. I saw the clock next to my desk. Apparently it's one o'clock in the afternoon. About who came? My sister?

Without cleaning my face into the front room. Without seeing who the guests were coming from, I opened the door immediately. The young man in a gray-white uniform stood behind me. And I'm so familiar with that back. That back must be Alex's!!

"A-lex?" Saying stammered. Instantly my throat became dry. The young man turned around. His face looked very worried when he looked at me.

"Khanza... Wh-how are you?"

"I'm-I'm fine..." We both looked wrong. Confused what to say.

"I... I'm here to make sure you're. I see you're fine. Then I'll say good-bye first..." Suddenly Alex turned around to get ready to leave.

"Al-anlex..." Call me with a stifled voice. Alex stopped his steps and turned back towards me. I'm so nervous. I see she's nervous too. "Want to have some tea first?" My mouth unconsciously said that. I want to slap my own mouth.

"Can?" Alex held the back of his head. It seemed like it was a spontaneous movement to expel his nervousness.

"Yes." Yeah." I answered with resignation. I opened the door wide, allowing Alex to enter my humble home. "Please sit down." I said politely.

"Yes, thank you." Alex was sitting on the sofa whose padding had been torn here and there.

"I'm sorry, you have to sit in an unfit chair..."

"It's okay. It's so soft and comfortable." Alex looks to be securing himself. It seemed like he wanted to give the impression that he was at home.

I went to the kitchen and made Alex a cup of tea. While waiting for the water to boil my mind raged. Thinking what will we discuss next? How to deal with an awkward situation like this?

Not five minutes of water was boiling. I poured water into the glass in which I put the tea bag. I nervously brought the tea to the front room.

"Thank you." Alex said when he saw me putting tea on the table.

"Yes, you're welcome."

And we came back awkward. I looked down while playing with my hand. I saw Alex doing the same thing.

"W-how are you?"

"I'm fine..."

"Is it no longer painful?"

"N-no..."

"Did you experience something like this every month?"

"Yes..."

"What did the doctor say? Can it be healed?"

"Yes..." I just need to answer. Though healed not I have not tried it.

"Thank God then."

"Yes..." And we went back to silence.

"Oh yes, Mr. Riswan said for your running race can be proposed. Follow the schedule of another class."

"Yes, thank you..." The silence happened again.

"I... I drank the tea, huh..." Alex quickly picked up the tea and sipped it.

"The look is still hot." But it's too late.

"Muhuh... Awwwwuhwho... " Alex spouted the tea and fanned his heated tongue. My hand automatically picked up the tissue on the table and wiped off the tea marks splattered on Alex's shirt and pants. Unknowingly I also cleaned the tea in Alex's mouth area.

Suddenly Alex was no longer excited. He was silent. I was silent too. Surprised by my own attitude. My hand became motionless, remaining on Alex's cheek. I glanced at Alex. Our eyes met and were glued. Nothing moves between us. As if there were magnetic fields, We stared at each other in silence.

***

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