I'm Just a Figurant
Ch 20 - Curhatan Youth Broken Hearts

Alex stops the bike at a cafe. There are many young people in pairs at the cafe.

Alex took me to a table in the corner of the room. Then he ordered some drinks and snacks. After the drinks and snacks came, he just focused on seeing me.

"Khanza..."

"Yes?"

"You hate me?" ask with lirih. I looked at Alex deeply. Weighing answers.

"I hate Alex now."

"I'm still the same Alex..."

"It's not the same. Alex wasn't like this."

"What was Alex like?"

"It's not like this. The same flirtatious chick, the appearance of urakan, smoking..."

"Yourf..." Alex took a long sigh. There was sadness on his face.

"What's really going on? Does this have anything to do with Miss Diana?" Hearing Diana's name is called making Alex's forehead wrinkle. Right my guess, Alex changed because of Diana.

Alex held his head with both hands. He looks very frustrated. Then with a heavy heart he looked at me.

"You know I love Diana?"

DEG

Heart melos. Although I know Alex loved Diana the same, but when those words came out of her mouth it directly hurt me.

Alex really only thinks of me as a friend. I was not in his heart at all. I am the greedy one. Though in the past I was satisfied if I could be friends with him, it turns out after it was realized I was expecting more. I really don't know myself.

"Yes, I know." Reply slowly.

"Deciding with him is a tough decision. I had to do it..." Alex's eyes looked bright. He seemed to regret his decision.

I waited for Alex to tell me, but the man's mouth was locked. Unable to hold back, I finally asked.

"What's wrong with you guys? Why did you break up?"

Alex looked at me blankly. Then he looked up. Seem reluctant to speak.

"Can't you really go back? Is the problem really that heavy?" ask me in a slightly urgent tone.

Alex seems to be in a dilemma. On the one hand she still loved Diana, but on the other hand there was a reason that made her do such a thing. What's their problem? If it really is still a pity, why break up?

Alex is silent. His eyes are still glaring. There was sadness and frustration on his face.

Seeing someone I like grieving because of another woman certainly makes me hurt. But I'd be sadder to see Alex that way.

"Can't you really go back?" I asked back.

"I can't forgive him yet."

"Diana did anything wrong?"

"I don't want to tell you." Alex kept his mouth shut.

"What is your love for not being able to ignore his mistakes?" Alex remained silent.

My heart feels very sick. The taste is sourced inside the chest, as if spreading throughout the body. This pain makes my chest tight. My body is shaking.

It hurts!! My heart hurts so much!! Alex is crying in front of me!! Alex is sad in front of me!! And all because of another woman!!

I don't know if I should entertain myself or Alex? We both need some comfort.

God, why is it so painful to like someone? Why does this pain increase when you see him crying because of someone else? How do you get rid of this pain?

My eyes started to glaze over. I refrained from crying. I have to be tough. I have to put aside my own pain. I have to focus on Alex's pain right now.

I stood up and sat down next to Alex. I was confused how to comfort him? How do you comfort a broken hearted person?

"My heart hurts Khans... This... It hurts so much!!"

Alex looks up. He took my hand and carried it to his chest. His eyes were red with tears. There was a trail of teary-eyed feathers drenching the cheeks. This is the first time I've seen Alex cry.

My 99% man turned out to be just an ordinary young man. Who can cry because of a broken heart. Who have a fragile heart because they are hurt. Alex wasn't always cool. He has another side that no one else knows about, and he shows that side to me, which he considers to be his friend.

I don't feel my tears falling. My mouth is my mouth, I can't say anything. I just want Alex to know that I feel his sadness too.

I want to do anything to cheer him up. But my rigid self could only be beside him, without being able to speak this mouth.

Alex, I'm so sad for you. Finish your grief right now, don't let your grief drag on. Let your heart grieve now, but be happy for tomorrow.

For the next few tens of minutes Alex remained speechless. He wiped the remains of the tears with his hands. His face looks clumsy. It seemed like he had just realized that he had already shown the weakest side of himself to me. Alex didn't dare look me in the face.

"It's night. Let's go home." He said without seeing me.

Alex stood up and went to the cashier. I followed him without saying anything. He took his bike in the parking lot. After making sure I was sitting properly he took off his bike.

On the way home, we were both silent. I looked at his back. Wants me to hug that back. Tell him I'm here for him. So don't be sad anymore. But of course I don't have the courage to do it.

It didn't feel like we were in front of my house. Alex helped me take off my helmet.

"Thank you Khans..." Alex was silent for a moment. Then he took my hand and held it for a moment. "Don't hate me..." Say it with sadness.

Hah, I want it to feel like I'm scattering at him and hugging him. I shook my head to answer his statement. She smiled a little.

"Thank you... You're my only sincere friend. Don't hate me..." Alex grabbed my head and ruffled my hair. "Stay be my friend Khans. Stay like this, yeah..."

The emphasis on the word "friend" he said several times made it difficult for me to swallow. I can only nod my head.

"Rest. Sleep well yes. Greetings to Dad..." Alex patted me on the shoulder, then he turned around and got on his bike. I watched Alex until his body was lost in the darkness.

***

That night I couldn't sleep. My mind wanders everywhere. The look of Alex's grief that could not be lost. Every time I remember Alex crying, it makes my body tremble with tears.

Alex loved Diana. She loved Diana very much. Only Diana could make him happy as well as miserable. Only Diana is able to turn a cool Alex into a flirtatious man, blustering and not knowing the rules. Only Diana is able to make Alex back to being him. Only Diana!! Not the others.

I want Alex to be the old Alex. Good, cool, but sometimes also nosy. Only Diana can make Alex the way she used to be.

I don't know what's going on with them, but whatever it is I have to get Alex and Diana back together.

If Alex would only be happy to be back with Diana, then I would do anything to get them back together!

***

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