Finding You, Again
David 12 - Story Continued

Myra tried to regain control, trying to hold back sobs. After his breathing was more regular, he continued the story that had been cut by tears.

"Owen was furious, as I was presumptuous to speak to the Elders without his consent. Especially after knowing all the Elders accepted my decision. The elder who supported me became Zhena, was also satisfied that I handed Scion over to this pack. In tears I persuaded Owen to accept everything. I'm trying to make him understand that I'm doing it all to get everyone back to peace"

"Owen finally accepted, on condition that I stay at Manor until you're born. After my decision, I began to be able to look and greet Juno. And you know, Juno turned out to be a very awkward and shy person" Myra smiled slightly remembering that.

I who have not much memory of him, can only nod.

"For a few months I was in the manor waiting for your birth. Juno and I are finally close. Maybe not a close friend, but we try to forget each other's thorns that stick in our bond"

Myra took a heavy breath afterwards. His face looks tired. I approached Myra, then pulled her to walk after me.

I took her to one of the white long chairs under the tree and sat her down.

Still in silence, I sat down next to him and then looked at the greenery that stretched before us.

Myra was also silent, her eyes still glaring far away.

The story is not finished. With a heavy breath Myra continued.

"Then that day came, I gave birth to you in this world. The sound of your cry at that time was the most beautiful sound I had ever heard, other than Owen's. I cried happily hearing it. Owen held you in his arms while laughing happily. For a moment we forgot the harsh reality that was waiting for us after that"

"You're so handsome with thick black hair like your father's, with a little bit of white over the ears. Owen said, It's because you're destined to do great things if you grow up. Words that don't make sense. But I just laughed at hearing it"

The grievous whisper came back after, I can guess what it will tell me after this.

"But of course, I have to pay for all my deed. Two days later, I handed you over to Juno. I feel, if it takes too long with you, then I will not be able to part with you. I made Juno promise to take care of you like her own son. Juno responded with a face full of tears. He's a gentle person, Juno also dislikes what fate has done to the three of us. And that's it, I left Manor and lived with Elder Calida"

Myra no longer sobbed, but her gaze was blank and hollow. Maybe that's how it was, his life at the time, empty and empty.

"I know my decision to hand you over to him, will hurt you. But please understand!! At the time, that was all I could do"

Now he looks at me with begging eyes.

I who was unprepared for this change, could only look at him in amazement.

Did Myra just beg me to forgive her? A very bad joke.

"Yra!! I never blamed you for that. How can I be angry? You were hurt by it too. Dad too. How could you think I'd be mad?" I asked in wonder.

"If anyone deserves to be blamed, it's Egon. She told me like you were a cunning and cruel fox woman, power-hungry. And you can also blame me, who had foolishly believed so easily with that lie. I hurt you with my cruel words. I foolishly chose to leave this pack!" I said, ruffling my hair in frustration.

I'm the one who should be apologizing, not Myra.

"I easily believed Egon's words. The rotten man said Dad and you hid the fact that you were the one who got my mother killed. He also said, that's why Dad and I don't have a mind-link relationship. Dad and you, want to hide that evil from me"

Unknowingly, my tone of voice had risen.

My blood boils when I remember that day, when Egon put poison in my brain. I regret every second I spent hearing her story.

I used to wonder in my heart why I couldn't have a mindlink like Uncle Rex and Roan. I was very disappointed, when I realized, the mind link between me and my father and Myra was not formed, once I transformed for the first time.

I could only hear enviously how Roan told me about the mindlink he formed with Uncle Rex a year later, when he finally managed to transform perfectly.

I once asked, but father gave an excuse if it was not time for the mindlink between us to form. I have to be patient because Alpha's mind is a heavy responsibility he said.

I was disappointed, but I understood and tried to be patient. But until I was 17, the thing I was waiting for didn't come.

Egon looked at the crack, and filled it with poison. A vicious poison that burns my mind with hatred.

"There is truth in Egon's story. Your father and I, indeed feel very guilty about what happened to Juno. That's why, we can never have a mindlink with you Duke. We were afraid that if we had to tell you, that you were a child-----" Myra couldn't continue her sentence, her eyes staring at me languidly.

The grief and guilt that got in the way of the mind-link between me and dad. He didn't want me to know the poignant story, between him and Myra, and also the fact that I was the child of their affair.

With tears flowing Myra looked at me. "I've never been angry with you about those harsh words. Because I deserve it. I am indeed the fox woman who snatched your father from Juno" Myra's eyes turned to look into the distance.

I can't say any consolation for him, because now my mind is like a dead end.

Myra's stories are like the ones I read before I go to sleep and I want to forget them when I wake up. Because this story is so sad and so sad.

After being silent for a long time, Myra went back to telling stories.

"That night I was alone in Elder Calida's house. Calida was exposed to toxins from the mushrooms she ate during the day. Calida was a little careless. He was nauseous and kept vomiting because of the fungus. Elder Galen finally took her to the hospital."

"It wasn't my first time home. So I don't have any inkling. But in the middle of the night, my nose smelled the scent of a foreign wolf. But it was too late, because they were very close. I transformed and had a chance to howl for help before one of them charged at me ferociously. When I looked at the numbers, I realized the chances were very small to be able to defeat all of them."

"So I started running, trying to separate them. I managed to deal with some of them, but I was still no match for 10 wolves. One of the wolf fangs broke my leg and cornered me. But your father and Egon came at the right time. Like a fool, even in such a wounded state, I was so happy to see Owen, because I had never met him in person for 5 years"

"I who can't run anywhere anymore because of my broken leg, became careless because of that happiness. As a result, I didn't see when one of the Strays was after me. He jumped up and pointed his fangs at my neck. I realized when I heard Owen's desperate howl, but I knew it would be too late."

Myra's grieving cry came back uncontrollable.

"At that moment, Ju-Juno suddenly appeared and confronted him, the Stray ripped Juno's neck, leaving a gaping wound, which I knew, although with his healing speed, he would not survive"

Myra's cry broke down without any defense at all.

The number of tears that have been released until now makes me wonder, because it turns out there is still and continues to flow. His voice again stalled. I took great pains to decipher his words.

"Juno was lying helplessly in front of me, the wound did not stop flowing fresh blood into the grass. I dragged my nearly paralyzed serial body closer to him. I howled glare at her condition-me-me-me-----"

Myra was no longer able to continue, not only the sobs heard, but the poignant lamentations.

"Stop--stop it!! You don't have to tell me everything. Uncle Rex told me everything yesterday" I cried as I grabbed his body that was shaking with tears.

Myra just shook her head in my arms. I know Myra needs it. She needed someone as a place to tell her about all her feelings back then.

So I just tightened my arms so that the crying would subside a little. Troubled, Myra finally managed to let out her voice again.

"I won't be able to do anything to save Juno back then. But at least I wanted to apologize for everything I did, and also wanted to ask what reason made him save me. I brought my head closer to her, hoping she would understand everything I was trying to say in my head"

"For a few seconds I saw Juno's black eyes looking at me without breaking. And how shocked I was, with the remnants of his strength Juno stuck his forehead to my forehead. And at the same second, the mindlink between me and Juno formed. I howled between sad and happy, I knew with a mindlink it meant Juno had forgiven me, but it also meant I would lose a werewolf close to me"

"In the rest of her breath, she shared all the memories she had of you. How did you for those 5 years live in his affection. He spilled all those memories on me. He gave me a memory of how you walked for the first time, how your exasperated cry when your favorite toy broke. He doesn't want me to miss any of that. In that mindlink, I could also feel, a sense of regret for keeping me and you apart. My heart was completely broken at that moment. Juno was also the victim of all these twists of fate. He was more silent and obedient, but in his last moments, he made the courageous decision to sacrifice himself, so that I could be with you and Owen"

There were no tears, but Myra's face shriveled with guilt.

I held her back in my arms

It's hard to understand what I'm feeling right now.

Right now I feel so dwarfed, stupid and petty. I who knew nothing of all this arrogantly made a rash decision.

And therefore, making all those who love me and care about me hurt, even die.

I have to work hard to fix all this. And I don't know how many apologies I have to say after this.

I've made a big mistake, but I'll definitely fix it.

I'm going to start now, by calming the woman who's been crying in my arms for about an hour.

"You're a wonderful mother, Myra. Juno and you, are wonderful mothers to me. You both gave me the opportunity to grow up studded with love, love and warmth. You know Dad's not a warm and understanding person, but since you and Mom Juno are, I can tell, that he did all that to make me grow up to be a tough, responsible Alpha. You two are like warm coals that always welcome me whenever a winter storm from Dad hits . You are the one where I come home" I explained, holding Myra's pale hand lying on my lap.

Myra let go of my embrace and looked at me, I was grateful not to see any more tears there, I hope her supply of tears runs out at this time.

"But I am indeed a fox woman, Duke. I destroyed Owen and Juno's family. That's reality, and I'll never be able to erase" Myra squeezed my hand tightly.

Guilt has plagued him for 25 years. He refused to be happy because of his guilt.

"Don't blame yourself anymore. You said Zhena Juno was a victim, but what about you? You lived with all this for 25 years. You shouldn't torture yourself anymore with guilt" I said.

I didn't mean to judge her, but I really hoped Myra would wipe the guilt from her heart. Maybe not the whole, but at least enough not to make him resignedly accept all the insults I once hurled.

"I can't Duke!! In Juno's last thought, I could also feel his sincere love for your father, his sadness when he realized that Owen had chosen me. Even after I left Manor, their relationship didn't return the same, because Owen kept wanting me. I destroyed the happiness of the man who saved me from death. I won't be able to repay him for the rest of my life, how can I live happily after Duke?"

Myra squeezed my hands back tight and looked at me. My guess is wrong, because it turns out his tears can still flow.

I immediately wiped it off with my free left hand.

"Therefore you let me do all that? You let me yell at you, curse at you, and never say you're my mother. You're punishing yourself for that guilt?"

Myra did not reply, but she turned her face away from my gaze.

He did not want to, or ever tell me before today, because he wanted to get punished for what he did to Mom Juno.

She doesn't deserve to recognize herself as my mother. Myra wants to hurt herself, so that her guilt for my mother decreases a little.

"Don't you ever think that you're a victim of all this? You were guilty at the time, but you've made up for it with all the pain you've been through here, stop making yourself tormented. Mom Juno sacrificed herself for you to be happy, she gave you all those memories, not because she wanted to torture you in guilt, but because she also felt guilty for everything. But you chose instead to drown in your own guilt. I don't understand this way of your mind" I said with a slight annoyance.

Myra didn't make a sound after that. He squeezed my hand back into his grasp. There was still uneasiness and fret in his eyes. He still can't forgive himself.

"If you still can't forgive yourself, then my presence in this world would also be considered a mistake? I wouldn't be around right now if you hadn't made that mistake. Do you also think my existence in this world is a mistake that should make you suffer for a lifetime? If so, then I would rather not be born!"

"No..no!! Please don't say that. You are everything to me, not Duke!! I never regretted everything about you" she replied, in a panic.

He shook my hand in his hand. I tightened the grip to stop the panic.

My words were a little outrageous, but I didn't want Myra to continue to coiled with that guilt. Not after he lost his father.

I can imagine the night full of nightmares that Myra had to go through all this time. I don't want that to continue.

"Yes! i-i know. You wouldn't love me this deep, if you thought that. I say that, just so you realize that you've made amends for all your mistakes. I'm so happy to grow up in the affection you give me, isn't that enough for redemption? You did what Zhena Juno wanted, happy with Dad and me" I explained, hugging her once more.

His cries, whether for the umpteenth time, came back when he heard my words.

"Free yourself, you deserve to be happy too" I whispered softly.

After a moment of silence, Myra finally nodded slowly, and the shock of her body was also reduced. For a moment of silence, I kept holding her until Myra herself let go.

After that, the two of us just sat down speechless and immersed in each other's complicated thoughts, while looking at the reddish rays of the sun that were starting to sink.

"We must return to Manor, it will soon be dark" I said, extending my hand to help him stand up. And my decision was right, because Myra could not stand up, and almost fell down while getting up from the chair.

"You won't be able to walk back to the car" I said.

"What's wrong, I can" he replied, stubbornly.

I shook my head in disbelief, then crouched down to her back.

"Well, we have to leave immediately, people will be confused looking, if we're late for dinner" I break up, this will be faster.

Still awkwardly, Myra climbed onto my back and hugged my neck as a grip.

"Here we go!!" I said, standing up and starting to walk.

His body is very light. I'm going to tell Uncle Rex to force him to eat more after this.

"Do you want to leave this place immediately because you're still afraid of ghosts?" myra asked suddenly in a more cheerful tone.

"Nope.. of course not!! I'm a 25-year-old adult werewolf now, I won't be afraid of such a stupid thing anymore" I argued immediately. I don't like things that smell like horror.

Not scared, I just don't like it.

Myra laughed softly on my back. I'm glad he's been able to laugh again, hopefully it'll be a good start for us.

"Can I call you 'Mom'?" I asked a little slowly, out of embarrassment.

I should have done it since I knew this fact.

I could feel Myra nodding softly at my back as well as her hand further tightening her embrace.

"of course! I'll be happy" she replied, I hope she doesn't cry anymore, because her voice shakes again when she answers.

I smiled with relief. It's a new beginning for me and Myra.. Er.I mean my mom.

Not long after, a regular breath sound rang out from my back. I'm not surprised, even I feel so tired after all this.

I kept walking, and passed the car we were supposed to be riding in. I didn't want to wake him up when I put him in the car. I'll walk her up to Manor, and put her on the bed.

At least one of us, will get a good night's sleep tonight.

But not for me, there's still Bee and the depraved blonde vampire waiting.