My Love Journey's
Togethernesses.

Author's POV.

Paul looked at his wife. Bianka came back wearing clothes last night, just like her. Only a sheet on the shoulder counteracted the chill that Bianka felt, while Paul could not guess his reaction after the news was delivered.

"So?" insist Bianka when Paul does not answer.

Paul realized there was no way to escape the conversation, so he grabbed the phone, opened the video and showed it to Bianka. Paul observed every change of his expression closely. But, somehow there is not the slightest change there. Bianka just watched the video, then read Paul's post on his twitter before multiplying Paul's phone.

"So?" paul asked, imitating Bianka's tone. She kept her hands on the woman's back so that Bianka would not get up and hurriedly hid herself in the bathroom from getting angry at her. However, Bianka simply shrugged her shoulders. "You don't want to say anything? Not mad at me?" babble Paul, astonishment.

"Why?" bianka replied confusedly, her brows furrowed. "Nothing I want to say. We missed an incredible night. Which, by the way, doesn't make me mind if I have to repeat it in the near future" he said with a grin. "Why should we be bothered with a moron who has no more important job than recording our activities? I hope they can let us live in peace. However, I'm grateful because at least it wasn't a video of us making love in the park. If so, then it's obvious I'll disappear in an instant." Bianka smiled amusedly.

"Oh!" exclaimed Paul, not believing what he had just heard. "You're right. You'd kill me if that happened. But, I still didn't expect your reaction to be this light. I can't guess, but of course it's not in my mind. So.." murmured Paul, composing the words for a moment. "Casual? Well, just relax."

"Why again? Didn't you handle it?" sahut Bianka, referring to Paul's post on twitter. "Oh, and... I love you, Klug."

Paul welcomes with a smile of relief as Bianka bumps Paul's lips with hers, before deepening their kiss.

Paul pushed Bianka closer to her body, causing the sheets on her shoulders to slump to the floor. Her hand crept under the skirt of Bianka's dress, radiating towards the sensitive part of the woman. With one move, Bianka held her hand. "Uh, ohh! No 'breakfast' for this morning, sir! Your girlfriend needs a break, at least a few more hours."

"Oh, come on. Just play fast, love." Paul whined like a child, inviting the laughter of his lover.

"No. Hold it for a little while." said Bianka, laughing while pushing Paul's chest.

"All right."

"You haven't answered my question. Who's calling?"

"Oh, it's just Julia trying to ruin my mood."

Bianka chuckles. "Can we go back inside? It's really cold out here."

"certain." Paul cupped Bianka's body, grasped her firmly before bringing her inside. He sat on one of the chairs with Bianka on his lap. Bianka poked her face into the recess of Paul's neck, stretching her hands around his shoulders.

"We need a change of clothes, love. Otherwise, we can't stay here long." Paul mumbled softly.

"I know, but I don't want to go home to my sister."

"Not to go there, love. I have an apartment. I think we can go back there, of course after stopping by your house."

"No." insisted Bianka.

"Look..."

"Paul, no! I'm not going anywhere, at least until my mind calms down. We stay here or rent another apartment for a while." Bianka insisted that none of those places would make her homesick.

Placing his chin on Bianka's head, Paul let out a heavy sigh. "I don't like us arguing for these kinds of things." He took another breath before continuing. "If you don't want to go to your sister's house, or to your house, or to my apartment, well, that's okay."

"We're not arguing, Paul."

"Okay." said Paul.

They remained in that position for a while without speaking. What a calming silence.

"Bianka, we can't be like this. I acted like a page of a book that was open to you. I told you anything. My feelings, my fears, everything. But you... You closed everything to yourself. I want you to express how you feel, communicate with me. I want to be more than just your partner, I want to be your friend, the shoulder you lean on when you need to be, the ear ready to hear all your grievances. I want you to trust me completely, whether for petty things or big problems."

Bianka was still silent for a moment, before releasing a hug on Paul's neck. "I hate you."

Paul looked at him. "Sorry, what?"

"You said you wanted to hear my anxiety, so this is how I feel. Ihate you. Not as you, but more to your work. Since long ago, you've known I can't have a long-distance relationship, but your job requires that we keep separating. Well, not for a long time, but still... I know that's all you can do to survive, but Paul... I don't like it. I feel like an impingement for you, like a stash..."

Paul gawking. "Oh, you never said that. I thought you could take it. I could find another job if I did..."

"I thought you'd understand."

"Love! I can't read your mind. How am I supposed to know what you're feeling if you don't say it?" paul said it was new news for him. All this time he thought Bianka was fine and really did not know that she felt left behind. This was more troubling to him than admitting that Bianka did not believe him.

Bianka lowered her head weakly, staring at Paul's chest while her fingers played on the tip of the man's shirt sleeve. "I think you're right. I should have told you." He admits. "I know it might sound stupid right now, but I just don't want to bother you."

"I want you to keep bothering me. Even if only for a glass of water or massaging the legs. I love you, Bianka. I'm sorry I didn't realize it made you feel that way."

"I'm sorry for being so shut down. I'll try my best to be more open."

"Thank you." Paul responded with a calmer feeling. "You trying again? Tell me your dreams?"

Bianka sighed and got up from Paul's lap, then walked a few steps. "What else am I supposed to say?" When he turned around, his eyes were red. "I keep having the same dream. You already know the whole thing." He shrugged his shoulders. "What do you want to hear exactly? That I wish they were here and I'm the one who died? You've already got it. Satisfied?" Tears flowed down his cheeks.

Paul's jaw hanging. He stood up and eroded the distance between them. "Don't say that!" he muttered in a soft but firm voice, both hands on Bianka's shoulders.

"You want to know how I feel. This is what I feel. Every time I wake up after that dream, I want to die." Bianka.

"You can't give up." sizzled Paul as he pulled Bianka to his chest. His eyes began to get wet. "You can't die and leave me alone. We're gonna have another kid, Bianka. A dozen if you want. But I refuse to lose you."

Paul cupped Bianka's face with both hands, forcing the woman to look at him. The only thing he could see in the woman's eyes was only despair. "Promise me, Bianka... Promise me you won't do anything stupid. We're gonna get through this together. Don't be afraid your pain will affect me. We can do it, better and stronger. Promise me."

Bianka nodded, again placing her head on Paul's chest while the man hugged her tighter. They sobbed, hugged and strengthened each other until Paul's phone suddenly rang.

Bianka unraveled their embrace. "Thank God. I also want to go to the bathroom for a while." he muttered, directly stepping into the bathroom.

Paul took a deep breath before replying. "Hello?"

"Good morning, Mr. Clug. I've left the keys in the reception section of the hotel as you said. Please let me know if you need anything else."

Paul's smile rises. He really did not remember his plan of giving a surprise to Bianka. "Thank you." he said. "I'll call you back."

"alright. I hope your boyfriend likes it."

"I was expecting the same thing. Thank you, and I'll see you."

"Good morning, Mr. Klug."

Paul disconnected with a very wide smile, impatiently waiting for the next few hours.