Mr. HansH (Ishq Mein Marjawan)
Guilt

Pretend, or rather continue to pretend: just like a rape victim in general who will feel embarrassed when dealing with others, so, when HansH and his troops arrive at the scene, they will feel ashamed, I also have to behave like a girl who has just been raped. I opened the door next to me but I didn't go out, or I pretended not to get out of the car because I was ashamed of everyone. Meanwhile, HansH, in a hurry he got out of his car and ran up to me, opened the door and watched as I cried.

"Alisha," he said. I held her tight and felt her lips long on the side of my forehead. "I'm sorry," he said. "I'm sorry, Alisah."

Oh my God, I'm sorry I made you cry, My HansH. I made you feel guilty and again feel like a failure. I'm sorry I had to lie to you.

To be honest, I have no bad intentions. There is absolutely nothing. I just don't want my safety from this kidnapping and rape to make Nandini and Sheveni jealous of my good and bad destiny. Especially Sheveni, I'm sure she wouldn't be happy if she knew I was safe, while she didn't survive and suffered the rape, spun by many men even though he was no longer a virgin and no one knew about the rape - I did not want any jealousy in the hearts of his brothers HansH despite the risks it was HansH's heart that I had to break. After all, life is a choice. But it's okay, I thought. It's only for a while. On the night of the wedding, I'll admit everything. I'll be honest that I'm just having a show, and I'll explain to HansH what the reason for my actions is.

"Don't cry, honey. Everything's gonna be fine. Sure."

"But I've killed people. I'm killer. I've-"

"Shhh...." HansH let me out of his arms, cupped my face with both hands while looking at me fixedly. "You're just defending yourself. Okay well? You have committed no crime or criminal. No. gabe. That's not a crime. You're just defending yourself. Can you understand that?"

I'm nodding.

"good. Now stop crying, we have to go to the hospital." Quickly, HansH removed the suit from his body, then put it on my body. In the next second, he carried me and took me to his car. "Wait a minute" she asked after putting a seatbelt on me. "I need to talk to Vikram for a minute. Just sec. Okay well? Don't go anywhere."

I'm nodding. HansH closed the door beside me and went straight to Vikram. On the other hand, a number of HansH's other men were evacuating the bodies of the two criminals. I don't know what they're gonna do with the body, I don't know. Whatever, and it's none of my business.

A moment later, HansH returned to the car. Restlessly, he catapulted the car and drove it to the road. "We went to the hospital" he said.

But I shook my head. Refusing. "Don't take me to the hospital. I don't want to."

"But you have to be sterilized."

"I know...."

"Eat him it-"

"Take me to the clinic. Would help?"

"alright. We're going to the clinic."

Yeah, I can't be taken to the hospital. Instead I asked HansH to take me to the clinic of Sonia's sister-in-law Neha. With Neha's help, I can definitely engineer the examination for myself, and HansH doesn't need to know the true results of the examination I'm about to perform. However, everyone should still think that I have been raped, except for Neha and Sonia, because they must help me in this play.

Yep, all according to what I planned. I was able to reach Neha by phone with Nandini and ask her to meet me at Kak Sonia's clinic. Like HansH, the first time we met at the clinic, Neha burst into tears while hugging me. A thousand apologies he said, he felt very guilty because he thought, if he did not want to open the identity of Kak Sanjeev in front of his family, he said, he and I didn't have to leave Mahesvara's house because they were driven out by Sheveni.

"I don't blame you. I can face all this. I'm strong and I'm fine" I said reassuringly. We hugged each other tightly while crying, then I whispered, "I'm fine, Neha. Now accompany me to the examination without asking much questions. You understand what I mean, right? I'll tell you the rest after we get back to the apartment. Please help me talk to Sonia's sister."

For a moment, after releasing a hug, Neha looked at me with a question mark uttered. And I just nodded to answer all the questions that swirled in his mind.

Neha understands.

Dumbstruck. HansH looked at me in disbelief. "What do you mean, Alisah? I'll keep you company."

Where could....

"I can be with Neha. You go home."

"I'll be waiting for you."

"HansH."

"Whatchu mean? Why are you asking me to leave?"

"I don't deserve you. Do you understand that? Need me to explain the details?"

No. gabe. HansH understands what I mean. He shook his emotions, unable to accept reality. Then, just as I turned around about to enter the examination room, HansH suddenly grabbed me, hugging me tightly from behind. "Don't do this, Alisah," he quipped. Her tears are on my shoulders. "Don't ask me to leave. I'll never leave you no matter what."

"I'm no longer holy, HansH. I don't deserve you."

"Don't say that. You will never be deformed in my eyes. Please, let me stay with you."

"You can accept me even if I...?" I removed HansH's embrace from my body, then turned to face him.

"I don't care, and you don't have to ask me this anymore. I'll be with you. No matter the joy or sorrow. I want to be with you always."

I know, My HansH. I-i know....

Crying, haru, everything I feel. I slammed into his arms. Crying happily in his chest. Although all I did was play, but the feelings between the two of us were clearly real. HansH's love for Alisah need not be doubted even a little. He can accept Alisah as it is.

Really, I was swept away in that embrace. Warm and tight. Also when he kissed me on the forehead, I felt lucky to feel the sincere love of this man.

If I could truly become a complete Alisah, I would not regret anything.

"Now enter. I'll wait for you here."

I'm nodding. With one more kiss, HansH released me from his embrace. Now he smiled, though his eyes were still wet from the cries of sadness.

And I feel guilty, just for the sake of punishing Brother Sanjeev and not making my brothers-in-law's candidates feel injustice, I even have the heart to break my lover.

I'm sorry, My HansH. Forgive me....