Self Healing
Episode 19

Those who realize how valuable a person is after his disappearance, will only feel claustrophobic and regret haunting his life. If despair is not the patience he holds. 

*** 

     Naziya after from the funeral shut himself up until dark night. Nura nodded, Haris banged, Zayyan called out to him. Not coming out either, Grandmother urged them to let. Let him calm down, until he feels he is enough. Shakila is also like that, a form of attitude that is fortifying themselves so as not to do anything that can hurt themselves or destroy others. Shut up, until his heart feels relieved. Only Numan Nura who did not, followed her father sometime huh. Wonder woman, strong girl. You can laugh when the wound is breaking. Grandma said it when she saw them worried. Sure enough, Naziya came out after dawn. His eyes were so thick, his nose was red. "Aren't you okay?" Naziya smiled faintly, he ruffled the hair of Nura who was now not hijab. "No permission to go to school." They walked to the dining room. "Good morning, father's daughters. " Haris's smile widens. One by one, taking turns to kiss Haris, Meira comes with a doll. "Grandfather I want to, too" he whined. Naziya laughed he held Meira to align his body with Haris. "Cup.". "The grandmother pretended to sulk. "Great-grandmother noah, grandmother also. "Nura's turn who laughs. "Ashhhiiiippp." Zayyan breathed a happy breath. What a fun start.

***

   Hafidz's departure is still impending, his grief has not yet recovered. That day, the sun was not yet visible, while the clock had shown at 8:00, Hartono who felt he was not excited to work, he cried alone all night. Now he was sitting, near the swimming pool in his house. He seems to be holding a family photo. "Dad, eat first." The Word brought a look upon which was a bowl of porridge. "Dad, it's not good to eat. You go, "I ask. "Dad still remembers what was said at Hafidz's funeral." Word plays tactics. "From yesterday I haven't eaten anything, the Word still needs me." She wants to cry. Hartono told Firman to sit before him. Word submissive obediently, he crouched down. "Dad knows, but it's just pretending to be tough in front of them. I don't want to hurt you, Naziya. She was devastated, Ms. Rina said Naziya had been in several accidents that required her to lose someone. One of them is his father. I don't want to make Naziya guilty, fate will surely come even if it's not wanted. From him Hafidz learned little about life, his resounding Nazi slap. The distance between us was just erased last night, but the next morning." Word amazed, his father can always forgive with his own skill play a role. "But I just realized how valuable someone is to us when he's gone, this pain is more than when you left your mother. Father's lover. I'm sorry, have-."The words of Hartono stammered, The Word tries to calm down. "Firmana also feels like it's dad, but the Word is still alive." Hartono. "When are you getting married?" Still with tears that one two drops flow. Word silenced, suddenly remembered the face of Nadila who was smiling at the funeral yesterday. The Word felt drugged, his heart trembled strangely. "Some country is possible." The answer. "Ahh eat first yeah." He avoided that conversation. "Jawab first, did you have that candidate?" One mouthful will come in but Hartono keeps his mouth shut. "Yes, if the woman wants to." Hartono's eyes sparkled."Wh who? Then introduce quickly. If it's tomorrow." Word gulps saliva hard. "Can that be it." Her thought. 

***

   Deardiary 

 The birds had been singing this morning, and now they were flying in search of life. If it were equal, that would be me. The young girl who always mumbled through the word before dawn. Write down a wound and a wound that is there every day. Mother, I'm here now. Look at your picture. Dad, I'm sitting with a piece of memory about you. After writing, I returned to being a Naziya who looks cold not crybaby. Go to school looking for knowledge, and just an outlet from a stranger who continues to stab. Mamah I'm writing this not that I feel a grudge, but I want this to be a memory. Little memory of the good mamah when there is a father, Ka Nadila who is still immature and Nazwa who is always disturbing. To this day, 17 years live in the world. I just always feel alone. Oh yes, Bi Inah. How is bi? Ehh ko ngaur yes. Ahh bodo. But now there's no more, mother same father don't worry. Naziya was a little happy, but this miss did not pay off. Naziya remembered Bi Inah's words about patience. Nazi High School First Class. Naziya was hurt by the suave attitude and Ka Nadila that made the Nazis would run away, and cry for days on a one-week hunger strike. Bi Inah said, she understands my wounds. How I was after dad left. But aunty can't help, aunty doesn't know the problem. Non-Nazisya should be grateful, there are many brokenhome children out there who enter the world of darkness, hunger, and discrimination. But Non isn't it, is it? Although the attitude of mamah makes aunty also hurt to see it. And patience, it's just about time. Keep quiet and keep doing good. Let God give you the answer. And is meazing, Naziya felt it mother. Patience is a word that is easy to say but difficult to implement. The Nazis felt it, how the Nazis fought back. No religion calls for suicide when problems arise. That's what Naziya catet. Naziya meeting with Miss Rina, a lot of jail things that Nazis do. Until he told me about one thing. Encounter with Hafidz. Ahhh Naziya wrote his name was not strong, god. Yeah slapped him. He rese, but Naziya met him a second time. Nazi's head was sick and very sick Naziya was crying, one shadow about Mother existed. After the Nazis were in school, they cried, remembering a dream. Miris:) The Nazis returned home to Hafidz. He looks worried. And two days ago he was helping the Nazis, he was gone forever like a father. Makes the Nazis a little traumatized the Nazis didn't come out. There the Nazis thought about Bi Inah's words again. Destiny no one can resist, loss is the toughest test to achieve the next drajat. Naziya was afraid that Mr. Hartono demanded, but until now not really. Feeling guilty nested in Naziya's heart, mother. But when Naziya slept, after crying last night. Hafidz said those words at the funeral. Naziya envy, mother, father can Nazis come with him. Naziya… 

  The unrequited miss 

To whom I complain if not to my rabb. Who would I tell if not my writing. I miss. This fact has not calmed me down. I miss.

 The Nazis wiped away her tears. He rubbed the sheets that were hit by his tears. .