Self Healing
Episode 2 Me, Halina Ramadhani

          Crying will not give way. Blaming only grows wounds. Silence too, will not give an answer. Stand up after fighting against all the prejudices of impossibility. 

     🌸🌸🌸 

    Happiness should not be paid for by struggle. Laughter should be paid for with crying. Doesn't success have to be paid for with weakness." Never confess your faith, if your life never gets tested." Like a slap slammed hard, until penetrating piercing the chest cavity. The fireworks, then held back from the jolt, stood as strong as possible. 

      Shall?" In fact, the Nazis began to get tired, his life was like a knitted thread and difficult to decipher. 

      "Ziya... Lu mulu flat face, kayak toll road tau," seronoh Albi. 

    Albi was the most fussy student in the class, his humorous figure and his looks made some girls idolize him, but not for Nazis, he was still him. Mysterious and surprising. 

     "Emmm... " Naziya replied with a difficult look. Even in the depths of his heart, the distant one was compromising. About her life that always makes her careless. He left, left class. 

   "Well, where are you going?" a little cry of Albi made Naziya turn his head when he was already on the door, but still not be touched by him, for friends in the classroom, to the class, seeing the passing behavior of Nazis and Albi who was a little nervous was common. 

      "Whisper you, Bi." Someone snatched Albi's head. "Lu not bosen constantly being stirred that way, the child is already so ice times yes. So no one wants to nemenin tuh if again relapse mah." timpal Seli, a little make Albi frown. "You mean, Cell?" answer Albi. 

    "Think of it yourself." Seli answered with her cynical look. 

***

          The school corridor is still quiet, because it is not time for a break. Naziya circulated the whole view, saw the void and followed the direction his feet stepped. 

       Over there, a person dressed in shari'i slightly turned towards the Nazis in confusion. This is still the hour the lesson takes place. But the girl could walk leisurely, in the corridors of the school. So serious to pay attention to Naziya, his eyes did not escape from view, indirectly ignoring the direction of the road. So without realizing it, he hit the Nazis in the corridor that connects the direction of the office room with classes lined up.

         "Aww.. Sick," said Naziya holding his temple. 

"Ehhh ma-af accidentally" he said. The Nazis were half down because they held the temple slightly raised. He was momentarily stunned, something a shadow danced in his mind.

     "You should be fine, don't ever fight your mother, no matter who she is, she's still the mother who takes care of you. Although it wasn't the mother who conceived you." the voice echoed in Naziya's ears, as if it filled a corner on every surface of the room. 

    "What do you mean? Haa? You who?" Nazi speech is frustrating. Dark and black, just a flash of glittering light attracted the attention of the Nazis. Following, step by step the Nazis walked slowly. Fear was enveloping him, he did not recognize this place. 

   "I beg you to come out, who are you? Show me your face." His voice weakened as the cry broke, his face covered with his hands. "I-i…"  

     "Don't be afraid, come here! Here it is bright. See the lake and the sky is so bright" someone holds and lowers the hands of the Nazis. Their eyes clashed, his black bead eyes made Naziya stare.  "Why can?" Naziya said slowly.  

         " yeh, afwan. No problem."

Naziya let out a sigh, then without looking back at the man he returned to walk. Walk with a monologue heart. 

       Stifled and silent, as if there was a magnet binding between souls, even though it was only a few moments of unintentional gazing, he did not think so deeply. ''Ahhhh.. Let it be, astagfirulloh." 

    "That eye is exactly the same as the eye I saw in the dream, I don't know what your plan is, even though the sound is something I don't know what it means." 

      "Ziyaa... Where are you going?" for the second time the Nazis stopped. The call is sarcastic, like the sound of a whistle that sounds without the use of a tone. Loud and loud.

    Naziya pecked, his knee loosened. Although it is common, but still the present one seems to have a greater sign. 

     "Come to BK's room." Mr. Tino said by holding his Nazi arm roughly from behind. 

   The Nazis were still sculpting, usually always blurred when Mr. Tino came. This time no, only the sighs and sighs he was able to exhale. 

       Along the Nazi corridor was pulled like a goat that was difficult to walk. Mr. Tino looked tired, but anger was seen from the red on his face. The Nazis were not struggling, but his mind was guessing, and he felt he was confessing to the mistake he had just made yesterday. Without anyone, he felt safe. But he realized, Pa.k Tino will slowly find out.

      Again, that guy. The one who hit Naziya was Nurasyifa Maulida. Passes him. Nura greeted Mr. Tino with body language, he smiled and slightly bowed his head. Mr. Tino replied with a stiff smile, with his hand still blocking the hands of the Nazis. But a second later, when Nura and Naziya were only half a meter behind the Nazis, Mr. Tino turned his head. "Eehhh. You, don't go in either. Want to follow this kayak child," snapped Mr. Tino. 

     During this time the Nazis never played rough, he always managed to cover the problem with indifference. Butwhy? The Nazis cursed him, screaming inwardly holding back something he wanted to let out by exploding. Fuck******** with kindness. 

     Nura was shocked. "What father mean? I'm a new student here sir" she replied with a bow of her head. "I just got out of the principal's room, sir," he continued.

      Mr. Tino sighed, endured the embarrassment and apologized. "Yes, son, I'm sorry you yelled" he said.

      Nura replied with a radiant face, but her eyes were staring at the Nazis. After that, walk immediately.

       The Nazis who had turned their faces, immediately looked at Mr. Tino who was still facing Nura. 

      "You why? Ziya?.. "still in a hostile tone, Mr. Tino asked. 

    "Lepasin sir, sick," complained the Nazis, his voice trembling slightly. 

mr. Tino's anger subsided a little for Naziya, he took off his check. 

    "Let's go, don't be hard. Enter the BK space." Mr. Tino spoke immediately walking his feet. The Nazis were trailing from behind. 

    "But what was my mistake this time?" his protest, the vibration of the sound because it held the tightness was clearly heard. Mr. Tino who had gone a little far, turned his head. He was astonished, not the usual Nazi. 

    "Don't ask too many questions, just come along. Later you explain after facing Buk Rina, replied Mr. Tino flatly. 

     ***

      "Naziya before mom asked, do you know what your mistake was this time? Isn't that your boss?" Bu Rina spoke softly but sharply, her words were indeed not piercing but her tone of tenderness sounded like a whip. 

     Mr. Tino, who is still in the BK room, immediately asked for permission to go out to Ms. Rina. But before that, Mr. Tino whispered something right next to the Nazi's right ear as it passed him."Sorry I neng for just now, I am emotional towards others, even you laugh, Later if necessary, you can meet me after this business is finished. Let my hands flinch" he explained with a typical face of a father to his son. The face that felt hot from earlier Naziya resistant, now melted together with a dew point that came out. Mr. Tino's apology does sound sincere, and his attitude back to make the Nazis not afraid. Mr. Tino is the kind and polite school keeper, who is unyielding to his family. Makes Naziya think again, in the reality that he had to face. 

        "Dad..Look at this," cried the child half-running with a smile, towards the other side of the road. Two braided hair is characteristic, broad cheeks, white skin color and round eyes, has a brownish green retina plus lentic eyelashes make the appearance of the little boy admired by anyone. 

      "Brummm.." the squealing sound of the motor speeding against the direction of the child. Not long to sound. "Relunk…"

   "Dear Ziya, awass." the man whom the father called by him, swiftly protecting, thus causing him to lie down. 

       "Eheumm. "Mrs Rina cleared her throat. 

"Excuse me buk." Mr. Tino is leaving.

"Ziya you're beating on mom, right?" ask Miss Lina to make sure. 

     The Nazis just looked down, the dew he was holding, slowly bursting into rain. Shoulders shaking. Ms. Rina frowned, confused by her Nazi attitude which was slightly different from before. Buk Rina approached, she patted him on the shoulder and raised her Nazi face. Half gasped in shock, seeing that Naziya's eyes were already lush and the plains of his cheeks were wet. Ms. Rina who often faced with Naziya was astonished. "Naziya," he called again. 

  With a voice shaking, Naziya answered. "I didn't know before for this one why I went to BK again. If it's because I'm hanging around outside break time, I've been knocked over. And if ka-,"

 "Yes because what a pity, just go on. Don't be afraid," Bu Rina cut off to see a look of fear. 

 "Because I beat up a kid wearing a uniform yesterday, it's not purely for the hotshot but for helping people. To be honest I was tired of buk, back and forth BK and always stamped no really." Naziya sighed, he replied as his crying subsided a little. But his words hung, like there was something he was hiding and he was holding back from coming out. Ms. Rina saw those moves. 

    The position of those who were still standing, made Miss Rina who relented sit on the table. 

 "Good Naziya, you know.  I'm not going to force you more for the story, because basically every human being just wants his time. A time when he felt he had to do good and act a little evil. BK is not a bad thing baby, precisely because it is so loving. That's the problem, beating up people's kids. Do you know whose Nazi you hit? He is the son of the chairman of the foundation that owns this school. Then you'll face to explain. Don't be afraid again, there is a mother. One more reason why Mr. Tino got angry, because I told Mr. Tino to look for you when he was sleeping relaxed. Mother julidin him, so maybe a little upset and bored times yes, Mr. Tino likes you to ask to find you." the last sentence of Bu Rina to melt the atmosphere. He hugged the Nazis and hugged them. 

    "After school. You meet the mother, do not cry Mr. Tino will not change ko," he timid laugh bland.  

     He also took off Miss Rina's embrace. Forcing a smile, and removing a trace of tears.