FIZAH (Female Kolong Garbage)
PART 27 "Weird Views"

Of October.

The road to Kediri city.

Ratna closed her mouth. He looked across the street as if he was moving quickly to follow the speed of the vehicle. His head is slanted, his arms are cocked. Lips down. Our voices are still being interrupted by other noisy passengers asking to stand up, but the narrowness of space.

"Rabella?"

He showed his face.

"What will you do later?"

"I thought about it, Zah. I'm shy. I'm not ready to meet people. What if someone knows? Will my parents accept this reality? I feel like I have no self-respect anymore."

"You'll save."

"What reason did I have after leaving that long time from home?"

"Tell me if your departure is not your will. I'll help you talk."

"Zah, it's possible that I was deliberately thrown onto the bridge."

"If you are valuable to them, they will only lose. Why would they bother to send you to school if you end up just being wasted for no reason?"

"I want to tell you something, but I'm dizzy, Zah. There's been a few incidents that slip around, but nowhere after that."

"But, you remember, right, what your parents' names are."

"I remember her name was Eko. My mother's name..." Eyebrows converge. His forehead rolled.

"Sleep. It's still a long time. Strengthen your mentality."

Life is just a game. But, who would have thought in the middle of the game that many humans fell down to fall accidentally. Ratna. He accidentally got caught in a rotten place. It's not clear how chronologically he got there. I'm curious myself. Too bad, pretty looks don't make luck on his side. Now, his shoulders are burdened with worry. He's taking me to bed. Then, close your eyes first. I nodded.

Meanwhile, I was busy scavenging the scattered memories. I muttered softly. Sungkan heard by many people. I spent tens of kilos picking up verse by verse claiming to be angry with me. I don't want to say a piece of stuff. They sulked at me, crying like babies back then, but I couldn't get back. Now, I'm the one who's languishing. More than half of my memorization, the verse disappeared without a trace. I left no memories I can remember. I've been rewarded. I may have been punished for my negligence.

I looked at the vain day by day that I used to memorize it. I remember my promise to my mother that night.

"Mother, I give you the recitation of the Koran." It was also for the sake of the father who died.

I am the same as Ratna. Fear of disappointing my mother. Facing that fact is not easy. I imagine my mother's lips seeing my return. When you ask me how I've been doing all this time, I'll have a hard time telling the truth. It hurts more, the heart of a mother who raised me with her love and prayers.

Continue the journey for more than an hour.

Ratna is still asleep. Either really sleeping or deliberately silent to cover the unrest. When my hand almost touched his arm, his head held up. Gets me.

"Have you arrived?"

"Have entered Kediri."

"Can you sleep?"

"Little."

I gave him a smile.

"Oh, maybe I won't get married."

"Why all of a sudden?"

"Are there still good-natured people like men who help us out in time?"

"There certainly is. We just don't know if we're destined to find them."

"Who said?"

"I probably told you."

"A true heart is good, it will find its owner."

"Thank you for being my friend, Fizah. Although in the beginning you didn't care about me, you were another. You are different. You're my helper. Thanks." Thanks."

"Many things I know about you. I studied you, Ratna."

Get off at the terminal. After that we headed to Ratna's home address. May Ratna's memory still lead us to the right place. But a few times we had to stop by the side of the road. I waited for Ratna to remember the route.

Once wrong turn left which should turn right. Turn back to the red light. He looks confused. Quiet even though I asked. Then, tell the taxi driver to return the vehicle. I'm behind the tail. Shortly before the fork, they suddenly stopped suddenly even though the penny lamp was on to the left. Direct turning back, proceeding at a faster speed. Maybe he was now convinced by the right route. About ten minutes, he went down by the roadside next to the leatherback garden surrounded by bamboo fences. It seems that the benchmark is the leatherback garden. He waved, telling me to come closer.

Cube fare.

"Is this your home?"

"I'm not too sure. But, as I recall around the leatherback garden."

"If not, Ratna?"

"It seems right, Zah," he said hesitantly.

Steps precede. He looked to the left. Not to talk to me. Some passersby looked at him normally. He still refrained from asking. He was still observing until he was completely sure he was heading towards the correct address. When he was about to ask one of the people who walked without greeting him, he paused. Not so after being stared at again looked at with a strange look. Why why anyway? I was also surprised to observe their behavior.

"Where's your house?" I taught you steps.

Ratna silence. Confused face. More confused when again he was about to ask, who was asked to leave slowly. Speed up the pace, then run. The man whispered to the others. Maybe tell us not to pass in front of us because the man turned around while gradually operating his turongg bike.

"Who am I?" She's fidgeting.

"But, Ratna. If their attitude is like that, it means they know you. They look at you scared. If they don't know, how could they. At least stare at the usual."

*ratna

Nothing is different from the atmosphere of my home even though the dim memories I still collect. This leatherback garden belongs to my neighbor, forgetting whose name it is. I have a hard time asking because people are acting strangely. I don't really remember exactly how long I left home. This road I tread, if seen-see indeed from a long time ago seems to have been paving.

There are no new buildings, such as the house on my right side still remains with a food stall that is empty of buyers. Wish it was after magrib. There is no home with a new paint color. There were only trees in front of the house whose scars were cut down, then looked brighter.

Then, which house? I thought a house with a black fence with a yard not so wide was my house. The house is still on the second floor. But after I approached, it was the only house that had new paint and had some renovations. The building to the right becomes more futuristic added the feel of the playground in the form of swings, slides, home pages that turn greener with synthetic grass.

Fizah and I were in front. I was hesitant because of those people. There was no bell in front of the house, while the fence was tightly closed. Baggage's closed. There was no vehicle in front of him. Looks empty of residents. Unoccupied or its inhabitants are traveling.

Although I doubt, seventy-five percent I believe this is my home. But, why did mom and dadah change the architecture? When did you become an art lover? I still remember Papah with his academic character. And, people like the papah often ignore the futuristic and aesthetic nuances.

"Why, Ma'am?"

Fizah and I looked at each other at the same time. The man repeated the question. Knowing who I was, he widened his eyes. Before leaving immediately I held back with the call as it was. I forgot his name or I didn't know him before.

"Where is Mr Eko, Buk?"

"Sir Eko who do you mean? Eko here there are two."

"I'm Ratna. Papah's name is Eko."

"Rabella?"

Sorry, yes. Not according to the daily plan. Honestly, I have a hard time when writing stories of mothers added less supportive health. 🙏