FIZAH (Female Kolong Garbage)
PART 9 “Message from Surga”

A letter came for me. My favorite pink envelope. Exactly it.

To the honorable Fizah.

Assalamu’alaikum for your blessed days. Please guarantee, yes.

I don't know where my courage came from to send you a letter. I have found no more fitting intermediary than I have been forthright in this letter. You were healthy before? God is healthy always. I will pray for you to be healthy, safe, and blessed by Allah.

It's beautiful here, ma'am. Cold view. Moreover, lonely nights without a lover, made me fall for the stories I had heard. Sometimes this feeling is like longing for the Prophet. I want to meet you soon at some time. Unfortunately, I don't know when that was. How are you there? He is young, but he has to work. That doesn't matter to me, Mom. You have to stay up, yeah. Oh, yes, congratulations at seventeen. Those times are certainly the most anticipated. Rather confided, yes, Ma'am. Hehe. Hopefully his job will be done. Do not forget to be accompanied by prayer and earnest effort. Memorization is also carried out every time. But, without me telling you like this, of course, yes it is certainly done every day, right, yes. Because I became a recorder of the Quran out of my own desire. Right? Everything if it has been based on self-interest, the influence is huge for the progress in the future.

How much juz is it now? Can you still add a lot? Or, so little because of the work left. It's okay, Ma'am. It is desirable for all to reach the rido of Allah alone. As long as your parents are gone, your business will be done by Allah. And, if I may know how much time you're working? I want to try to help, right. If it is only half a day, it is still good for the murajaah memorization. Evening, evening, and morning can still be. But, if it is a full day, departing from the morning home in the afternoon, the morning must be murajaah. The night must be tired. Sleepy morning?? Must be able to fight. I'll monitor from here.

And, about when to go home?I want to meet Mama Fizah. Work out of town don't be long, yeah. Poor families who are surely longing. I want to know how successful you are there. Do not forget to report immediately if you want to go home. Successful work and successful launch memorization.

This is the third letter, I hope you will reply. I wait lo. Ma’an najah's. The barakallahulaki fi khair. It's just like that, Hafizah. Sorry for sending a letter. And, sorry for accidentally not telling me the real name. So that it's a surprise. So that Mbak Fizah curious and immediately go home. Wait a minute, if only Fizah had HP would be better. There is no need to send such shipments as ancient people. Hehe. Wassalamu’alaikum warahmatullah, Mbak Fizah glorified by Allah.

Signed from a secret admirer. It was the third time he had sent a letter. The opening sentence is always the same. Greetings and pray that I am healthy and safe. And, the most typical is the way to call me with a mbak call. From the way he used word for word, he respected me a lot, but as if he had known me for a long time. Sentences that are not awkward, do not use formal language even though they have never met.

But I really don't know who he is. Is he a man my age? Two years older than me? Doesn't seem to be far away. He knows where my house is. Who is my father, mother, and two brothers. How does he know my stories? Even the ins and outs of my happy childhood. He also reminded me of the past time when I decided to go to the mosque after the age of four I was tired of breastfeeding. I go there every afternoon to study. Then in the second letter, he praised the achievements I had achieved during school. My seventeen years have been so beautiful since her letters came into my gloomy life. Will he be my first love?

I smiled to myself. At puberty, I was just getting to know this kind of feeling. It was as if I had a message from heaven. I never asked for it, but it came suddenly that afternoon. The other employee who saw me, she sneered at me by saying I was depressed when Ratna fell. I feel like my world is back to life. The letter painted a rainbow over the sky where I now shelter.

I'm training. I'm grateful to still be sent someone who can make me pass happy. I thought there was no longer a man who conveyed beautiful and sacred messages. But, unfortunately what he expected was not what it really was. What about my mother's expectations all along? Must be bigger. I honestly miss it too. Sometimes I am afraid to go home. I can't bear to fade my mother's happy face.

“Are you crazy?” The Judge who suddenly stood in front of me said cynically.

I'm not hatching. Then the letter slipped out of my hand. Read by Mas Hakim. Then, it ended up in the front court. To see the letter torn apart, my heart was also eroded into pieces.

“What I am not at all..”

“Shut up!” He suddenly shouted.

Step forward. “So the letters I received were messages from your heart? Since when?”

I wasn't looking at him. My head had to look up to look for those two pairs of eyes. I'm afraid he'll brutally plug my eyes in.

“For what did he think of that?” my thinking.

“Since when did you have a lover?”

I'm unmoving.

I grimaced. A large pimple under the lips seemed to erupt exposed to his rough fingers.

“That mouth function is to talk.”

I'll let it go until fatigue vents anger. He'll be puffed up after that. What's he taking care of my love story anyway. Talking at length with him will only be free. He won't listen to anyone else.

He spit on the floor.

“Once again you don't talk, I'll get you into that space.” He seems to have acted like Mr. Su.

I swallowed my salivary.

The officers screamed immediately.

I was forcefully brought into that room. Instantly my body became shaky. I limp so suddenly that no rejection occurs. Me why?

He pushed me fast. I complain. My back hit the wall. It is not like a starving beast seeing its prey. But, at first glance he was like a bull that was about to cuddle its head. But, her open lips reminded me of a dog. His back legs are like horses. Kick the door until it locks itself.

But, what happened then? He suddenly fell in front of me. It looks like people have ayan disease. Twice this strange thing happened in front of my eyes. It's beyond my power. It's also not natural why this is?

I forced open the door to this room. And, it turned out that the officers greeted me with astonishment. All pairs of eyes look from the bottom up or vice versa.

“You okay?” Ratna asked.

I looked at the Judge inside.

They followed my cue.

Ratna's approaching. “You killed him?” Whispered.

But, that whisper was heard in their ears.

“It turns out you're a killer.” Someone is directly judging.

Help u! I am the same Paradise as Nawal El-Saadawi. That voice was ringing in my head. I don't know why he could suddenly be like that. He's not dead yet. Haven't.