FIZAH (Female Kolong Garbage)
PART 8 “Bird Voice Rek”
️ THIS PART CONTAINS MANY FIGURATIONS.
There's no way I'll suddenly become a fool by obeying his authority that will only take effect last night. I went to school and struggled to get perfect grades on religious materials.
“Hopefully you will survive death.” The sentence was pushed out.
“What do you mean?” The dim lights can still clarify his sudden surprised mimic I said so. Instantly his footstool was lowered.
“I heard that if a crow perched on top of this hut, there would be one of its inhabitants dead. Dead about.” I try to give as serious an expression as possible.
He put an ear. Yes, there are birds as a sign of death, he said. I just suddenly wanted to make up a story to trick her.
“Father still have family?”
“Not important. You still believe in myth.”
“And, when that guy is dead, he'll just be dumped, sir. If no family would pray for him, while in the world he sinned, he would be forever tormented in the grave. Understand once, yes,” I said later. More serious.
“Quick change your clothes! I've paid high for tonight.”
I kind of brought my face closer. I said half hissing, “Pak, if you die tonight, I say condolences, sir. Because I smell death from this room. I thought it was Mr.” The more unclear the writing.
The more I seriously spoke, the more the man turned wrinkled. If he was still afraid of death, naturally he would not come under this trash.
“Are you a psychic?”
“Yes. I used to be psychic. I was famous in his time. Then, I emigrated.” I guess I want to laugh a little. Why can I brag in the midst of my fear.
“But, you're young.”
“What if I am a woman who has eternal beauty? Is that trustworthy?” My buying is getting more and more.
“This life is already too modern to be crammed with nonsense.” He cut his worries.
Then he shifted position. He brought his face closer. From there, I could smell the pungent alcohol mixed with the musk scent from his body. I was pounding in fear.
“We're traveling tonight. The desert is definitely hot. It will make us tired. I'll offer you a drink.”
My body vibrates. Slowly I kept my head against the current in front of me. All of a sudden he hit the floor. Body twitched. He had a sudden heart attack or I don't understand. I just left it. It is clear that he will not die. I'll be right back in my room. Birit avoids the dense traffic in the middle of the music complain.
From there, I went to the bathroom. The first place I will always go. I showered. Sometimes when I smell my own body, I smell bad from my body. In fact, after I rubbed the soap all over, it was still unable to neutralize the scent. What's the matter? I fluttered all of it quickly. I won't be long or the other officers will be shouting furiously.
As always, I will always wear a long cloth. All my jewelry is too precious to take for granted. I approached Ratna who was mojok like a mad man. I still have food rations for tonight, and I'm not hungry. I brought it for Ratna.
I sat cross-legged in front of him. “Ratna, I'll tell you something. I feel weird, Ratna.” I opened the rice wrap in my hand.
I'll feed Ratna who won't eat for days.
“Ratna, while eating, listen to me talk, Ratna!” I gave him a cue to look up, then opened his mouth.
But, Ratna shook her head.
“Look at your skinny body! You're the most beautiful creature I've ever met in the real world.” I'm not really sure. With this seduction of mine, she can smile.
“Even if I am sickly, I will no longer be needed here. I'll get kicked. That's what I want, Fizah.”
“That's dzalim, Ratna. There's a way besides that. I don't want you to hurt yourself.”
He's looking up. Showing her red eyes. No more clear eyes. Once again the beautiful one opens the wound.
“Stay eating. After that, pretend to be sick.”
He opened slowly. An unfilled spoon went into his mouth. Her rabbit teeth were set between the two red layers on her lips. He chews very carefully.
“So I made it. No trip through the desert. I left him dying. Maybe a heart attack after I scared him that he'd be dead soon.”
“Then?” Ratna enthusiastic. The chewing motion was suddenly fast.
“I don't know.”
“Fizah, I can see something different in you.”
“You mean you believe I can tell someone?”
“Not. Look at you now, Fizah!”
“Why?”
“What's special?”
“I've also asked to keep wearing long cloth. But, you see how I am now, right? You're allowed. My advice, you should be more careful with him. I'm afraid he's more brutal than Mr. Su.”
He held my hand hanging in front of his mouth.
“You must promise for me.”
I keep looking at him.
“Only your soul mate has the right to own all your jewelry. Take good care. Don't be stupid like me. But, I'm not sure there are still good men out there. After a year here, I barely have faith in all the men.”
Sometimes I think alike. However, I have not thought about a companion. So far I have focused on thinking of ways to avoid my nights and ways to escape from here, without leaving behind the worst consequence of being known as a butterfly.
“Fizah, I now no longer care how people will scold me. In fact I've done the most forbidden deed.”
I held both shoulders. “You never wanted that. The mercy of God is wider than the sea of human error.”
“I'm not like you, Zah. I've been so terrible. You know for yourself, don't you, how I was yesterday. The luck of the women here is if they never get into that room. Only the most disliked people will get a reply Mr. Su.”
“Why are you so poor, Ratna?” my inner.
“How do you avoid, Ratna? Hasn't this been included for long? And, you're the most beautiful woman here.”
“I..”
I looked at him seriously.
“I always defy.”
“Easy then? I thought defiantly it would even make them become-so.”
He's turned. He told me to pull his messy hair. He told me to open the cloth until I could see the scars that had faded. Again, this reality cuts through my heart.
“That's how it is.” He came back to face me.
“This is not a sharp gun wound.”
“But?”
We froze. I see those eyes talking. I remember the caterpillar man and the sculptor man.
“You were forced?”
“Pasti always like that.”
“I don't think, Ratna. They're so mean to you.”
“True you. Beautiful is a wound. I was offered a very high price, but I never wanted to. I know exactly this place is already very damned.” It was like he was swearing.
“Follow my way by pretending to be sickly if you want to get out of here immediately.”
“I promised myself. Someday I'll take you out, Ratna. Then, you can go home bringing homesickness to your family.”
“I was picked up from the bridge. Somehow my parents looked like. I once thought, maybe I was born from a mistake.”
“You don't think like that, Ratna.”
“I picked up a couple of husband and wife. They consider me a very beautiful woman. They spoil me so much. I should be able to do this. Cooking, singing, playing piano, also dancing.”
“You can everything?”
“Ya.”
“A few days ago, I was also forced to sing. That's all I've done all night.”
“That's better than you being willing to be an antidote to thirst. A trip to the desert is exhausting, draining all your positive energy. Your soul and body can hurt if you're not really willing. After that, you'll just feel like a termite. Oscillated if wind.” He is analogy to himself.
“Then, why can you be picked up on the bridge?”
“I've forgotten everything. It was as if I was suddenly living in an age. As soon as I came to my senses, I slept in this room. That's the only thing I remember.”
Day by day passed. Meet at the beginning of September.