My Heart Was Wounded Deep
Chapter 62's

"I don't mean to be cynical" said Kikan. "I like him too. You have a good father."

Jason weighed in while looking at his car keys before looking up to look at his mother again. "If Papa asks you out, will Mom?"

Kikan was careful to hide his feelings. Does Jason feel something from the way he looks at Rey or talks about her.

"Oh, no," Kikan said while shaking his head. "I'm not the right woman for her."

"Then...who is the right woman? ask Jason.

"People with no criminal record," Kikan tried to be funny, hoping to make this conversation less serious.

"Mom said mom didn't kill Lori."

"Indeed. But your grandparents were close friends with Lori's family, and that put your father in a difficult position. He wants to be fair to me, but that'll get your relationship in trouble."

"Sometimes, when we really want to be with someone, it's hard to think about anything else.

"I wouldn't let him jeopardize that relationship even if he wanted to, which I know for sure he didn't. He'll find someone eventually, but not me." Kikan hopes Rey acts quickly and finds a boyfriend. Perhaps it would be easier to convince his heart to follow his thoughts.

Jason seemed to have no idea how to answer. "Well, I hope mom doesn't get mad if she buys you a swimsuit."

"Why would he buy me a swimsuit" he asked.

"It's okay" Jason replied.

♪

♪

Kikan could barely open his eyes. After Jason returned home, he rode a bicycle to Devan's office to use one of his computers and remained there most of the night. The sun will rise in a few hours, and tomorrow's Saturday will be very long because he has to make a lot of bracelets, but Kikan does not want to stop because a little more everything will be finished. Rey has sent him an email containing a hundred more photos of Jason from childhood to adolescence, which Kikan uses to create a digital album for Rey's birthday gift next week. Dona, the prison guard who helped her run the bracelet business while Kikan was still in prison, showed her an album containing photos of her grandchildren before Kikan was released. And Kikan fell in love with the concept.

Kikan is worried that Rey might already have the same album. But he could not think of any other gift he could afford, which the man might like. And there's a touch of art there, so it's impossible for Rey to have the exact same album that Kikan would give her later.

The only difficulty is mastering the program. Although editing his words was easy, once he mastered how to send photos, crop, rotate and flip them, it took hours to work on them. And after using all those special graphical means, this is the first album he made.

With a sigh of fatigue, Kikan looked at the clock hanging on the wall. Almost 4:00. Devan stopped by to say hello and say good night around 23:00. Kikan wants himself gone when Devan wakes up. But the man came back before Kikan could go home.

"You still here?" ask Devan.

Kikan turned down the screen containing the photo album, which he had checked again thoroughly for the last time. Devan will probably see the album at Rey's birthday party. Kikan plans to hand it over to Rey before the man goes to the blue lake, if the album can be delivered on time. But he didn't want Devan to know how long and exhausting the gift was. The hours she spent seemed not worth the relationship she was in, or not in, with Rey.

"Sorry," he said. "I'm almost done."

"Not to apologize. You don't bother me at all." Devan said.

"Why did you wake up in the middle of the night?"

"I got up to go to the bathroom, saw the lights were still on and thought maybe you fell asleep here."

"No. But I'm also very sleepy."

Devan walked behind Kikan. "What's so important that you don't sleep all night?"

"Bracelet order only, communicate with my buyers. And Rey sent me pictures of Jason year after year. Most of them I've never seen, so.... I was looking around."

"He's a lot friendlier than I thought. I know, he was scared when he found out I was coming home." Say Kikan.

Devan folds arms. "Because you're a man-eating monster."

Kikan grinned at the joking tone in Devan's voice. "According to some."

"Have you ever had any more trouble with Logan?"

"Not since the incident at Black Coffee" replied Kikan.

"Hopefully he'll get caught" Devan said.

"I'll try to get far away from him. Maybe he'll understand that torturing me will be more troublesome than the pleasure he gets."

" What if I take you to see me awake?"

" No, it's too late now. Go back to sleep, I have a bike."

" We can put it on the back of the pickup. We've done it."

" The distance to my house is only about two kilometers. It won't take more than ten minutes." Decline Kikan.

" You locked the office then?"

" Yes, I promise."

" okay. I'll see you tomorrow."

Devan turns to leave, but Kikan stops him. "Devan?"

The man turned to look at her.

" You're very kind" said Kikan. "Thank you for being so nice."

" I'm sure you haven't noticed, but you're very special."

Kikan doesn't know what he means. "What's so special?"

" Most people who are in your situation will definitely let hatred and sadness eat them alive. But you managed to avoid it. I think people like you will win in the end."

" Winning what?" muttered Kikan. Devan walked out of the room. The problems have not been resolved. But he could not complain, he finally got freedom. He is in a relationship with Jason. He can make a living despite his dark past. And it feels good to know that he earned Devan's respect.

♪

♪

Perhaps for the 100th time Kikan stood up and retreated to observe his dining table. He was trying to collect the tableware. Not everything fits, but he improvises as much as he can and in his eyes, his way of arranging and blending dishes, glasses and other trinkets is quite stylish. Kikan doubted whether Rey and Jason would notice, but he was proud of the results he had achieved by going to the yard to look around, making glass coasters into butter containers, he said, the pan and two handles become a bowl of pasta. He cut old cloth patterned plaid and extra cloth that has been used for napkins. They will drink from thick, jar-shaped glasses. If not looking close enough to know all the imperfections that exist, Kikan thought his efforts were very good. The cuisine smells delicious with the aroma of basil and oregano that it puts into spaghetti sauce. He had cooked for Jason before, but not with treats laid out on the dinner table just scrambled eggs, vegetables or a grilled cheese sandwich.

And he's never treated Rey.

Once satisfied, Kikan rushed to the bathroom. He did not want them to come before he finished bathing and changed clothes. Kikan should get ready soon.