My Heart Was Wounded Deep
Chapter 64's

Rey decides that she must not urge Kikan to come to the cottage. It will only irritate Kikan, and he knows why. The woman had spent seventeen years feeling sorry for falling in love with him, and now Rey had asked her to put her hand back into the burning fire.

Too soon for something like that. If she wants to date Kikan again, Rey has to move slowly, even more slowly, with the steps she has taken with any woman. But it's not as easy as it sounds. Rey can't get Kikan out of his mind, and his desire to always touch the woman makes him lose his mind, especially since he knows Kikan wants the same. That's what he did in the pool. Just imagining that Kikan let her do that already made her passionate.

After they eat dinner, Jason goes to the living room to work on chemical PR, and Rey insists on helping Kikan clean up.

"Guests shouldn't be doing the dishes" the woman said. "What if you just relax? See Jason in case he needs help?"

" He can be alone. I don't mind bringing you some stuff." Said Rey.

Rey piled the dishes on the table but could not decide what to do with the rest of the food. It seems Kikan has no container to store. Rey thinks she can cover every bowl with plastic wrappers. But when he opened the fridge, Rey saw the contents filled with bottles filled with spaghetti sauce?

" Wow! Why are you making so much sauce?" Rey turns around when Kikan comes to her with their glasses.

Kikan shrugged as if it was no important matter, but he looked a bit embarrassed. It takes a few tries before it gets the right taste."

" You've made spaghetti sauce many times?"

" This is my first dinner party. I can't present anything unpleasant" he said, as if anyone had done the same.

It's just, this party is for Rey and Jason! Rey pointed at the bottle that was lined up in the refrigerator." What's wrong with all that?"

Kikan frowned. "Not good. I'm not sure where it's wrong."

" Why are you keeping it?"

" It's not good to waste food. I'm gonna eat it. I just need to heat it up again later."

So the sauces were good enough for her. Rey has never met a woman as sweet as Kikan. Who would have thought that he would admire a woman who was considered to be the trash of society rather than all the other citizens of the city? He almost laughed considering how scared he was when he heard Kikan was coming back, especially when he compared his previous reaction to what he felt now. "Well, if you've discovered the secret" he said. "The sauce is delicious."

" Thanks." Kikan looked satisfied with the praise, as if he had managed to reach the target he had set himself. But he didn't want Rey to go near him after that. If Rey steps into the refrigerator, Kikan will leave, if Rey comes to the table, Kikan will step into the sink.

Rey felt Kikan's determination not to even agree with her was ironic. Kikan so wanted himself seventeen years ago. Now when he wanted Kikan, no matter what everyone said, she did not want to get close to him.

They finished washing dishes and playing cards while waiting for Jason who was finishing homework. Rey pays more attention to Kikan than to his cards, but Kikan looks elsewhere when their eyes meet. After that, they took a walk along the small river. When Jason holds Kikan's left hand to make sure he doesn't fall on the slippery rock, Rey hopes he can hold Kikan's right hand.

Instead, Rey walked behind them.

" We can help you clean up this place" Jason told his mother as he glanced back to show her he was talking about the page.

Kikan looked happier than Rey had ever seen before. He was obviously very happy to feel Jason's hand clutching his hand. Just seeing them together makes Rey again feel guilty for having separated them before this. It's magical Kikan doesn't hate him for that.

Or maybe it's part of the problem.Maybe Kikan does hate him. Rey doesn't feel the hatred, but she doesn't understand how Kikan can avoid the hatred towards her that has been preventing Kikan from something she craves most.

" I'll consider it" answered Kikan. I wanted to get it done sooner, but I had to be careful with my mom. Moving things around and especially throwing anything away would make him angry. Anyway, this place belongs to him."

" You took care of him" Rey added.

" As far as he's allowed me."

" No hurry" said Jason." We'll be there whenever Mom needs."

" You're so good." Kikan glanced at their son. Then they pause near the cool water to admire the surrounding scenery.

When Rey came to their side, Jason said, "Here, hold Mom for a second. I'll see if I can find some rocks that can be jumped."

" I don't need help," Kikan protested but Jason put their hands together and started looking for stones.

" Are you okay?" tanyakanya.

" You did it on purpose!" exclaim Kikan. Rey raised their hands, showing how their fingers interlocked. "Successful right?"

♪

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" So..how was that?"

Rey glanced at her son as they drove home from home. "Whatchu mean? You were there. Everything went well, didn't it?"

" Papa had warned me that the food might not be very good.even so, I would still eat it. But I thought it was perfect."

" it does." Rey didn't mention the biscuits she swapped the other day, or that Kikan made either how much spaghetti sauce before it got the right flavor. "He is learning."

" and..."

" And what?" ask Rey.

" How did Mom treat you?"

Is Jason starting to wish they were back together? "As I said.... You were there."

"I have to do PR while you're in the kitchen."

Rey pursed her lips while remembering. "He's. be polite."

"That's it?" ask Jason.

"I managed to get him to hold my hand."

"In the house?"

"No," Rey confessed, keeping her gaze fixed onto the street.

"Don't talk about that in the river, '" Jason grimaced. "I'm not sure if it would work if we nearly pulled a woman into the water."

Rey never imagined her son would be in a position to criticize her ability to attract women. But their relationship is unique. Their age difference is not as much as most fathers and other children. They worked together a lot, and that tends to make Jason feel more like a friend, sometimes. "He was easily surprised" Rey said.

Jason held his arm against the car door. "Every time I talk about you, he just says good."

"It doesn't mean he's willing to go further than just a friend" Rey said.

"Papa needs time to win his heart."

"Taking him out of this small town, to calm the mind, where he doesn't feel too depressed by the past, will help." Rey mused. "I hope to convince her to come to the cottage with me next weekend."

"Mom won't come? "

Rey shook her head and Jason said, "I'll find a way to convince her."

Rey told her son not to do that. It would be unfair to involve Jason, given that Kikan is willing to do anything for the sake of their son. That gives Rey a dishonest advantage. But his doubts did not dampen Jason's resolve.