Stuck With My First Love
I'll Let You Go

We finally got to the Alila Hotel. Apparently he brought me there. This is the first time I've set foot here. The best five-star hotel in Solo. The inside of this hotel is very beautiful. Luxurious and majestic. He then took me to the rooftop of this hotel.

When I was in the elevator, every person who got into the elevator, he was always standing in front of me. Like trying to protect me. Makes me feel flattered by her attitude towards me.

At first glance I look at this figure in front of me. He got higher. His body is also getting athletic. He seems to be getting a lot of gymnastics. Because his arms look big. His shoulders also looked wider.

How's the bread torn? Aahh.. you pervert!! Why did I even think of that beautiful ripped bread?

Immediately I threw away the dirty thoughts in my head that actually imagined the multi-layered torn bread belonging to Coco is very beautiful.

Arriving at the rooftop, we headed for a seat in one corner of the rooftop. View from the rooftop of this hotel is very beautiful. I can see the view of Solo from up here. Solo City at night.

While waiting for the food to come, we had a small talk. He asked about a few things. I answer what it is.

Then our food came. Honestly, the food here I don't know what it's called. Because this time I went to Agra Rooftop Lounge. Later I found out, the food we ordered was a Romance in The Sky menu package. Romantic Dinner Package name offered at this hotel.

After eating, we talked again. But this time it was different from before, he looked even more serious. That question came out of his mouth too.

“Why did you leave me?” the tanyanya surprised me.

“Why Vi? Why did you leave me six years ago?”

“Do you know what I've been through all this time because you left me like that?"

He began to vent his emotions. Emotions in his heart. Makes me just be quiet. I dare not answer his question. His eyes full of anger. I couldn't look at her face looking at me with a look of anger. I can only bow.

“Why are you silent?”it struck me and the people on this rooftop.

“I'm sorry Co” I answered softly while holding tightness in my chest

“I don't need your apology. I need your explanation” shouted again

We had a big fight that night. He's really mad. I saw some people at the rooftop. His loud voice made the hotel waiter to reprimand us.

I want to cry. I can't explain why I left him. I held my tears so I wouldn't let them flow.

“Do you want to see me marry another woman? What do you want?”

I want to dodge. That's not what I want. But I can't.

“Iya” I lied because of desperate circumstances, because he kept urging me.

“What?” he doesn't seem to believe my words

“I want to go home now” my door

I can no longer continue this conversation. It's too painful. Heart hurts. My chest feels tight.

“Alright.if that's what you want”

I thought he'd take me home after this.

“I'll soon marry” she said while looking at me.

Degh's..

It was like being struck by lightning, I couldn't believe what I just heard.

She's getting married? I didn't hear wrong, did I?

He said.will get married?

Suitup?

I never meant for him to marry another girl.

“Good if so” I said limp.

We finally came home. The day is too late. He drove me to the boarding house. All the way home, we didn't say a word. We are both silent. I kept thinking about what he said on the rooftop. Words “dia will marry” keep on teasing in my ears.

Again like before, in the car he turned on the radio. This time the song is Broken Vow, owned by Lara Fabian.

Tell me her name I want to know

Tell me his name..I'd like to know

The way she looks..And where you go

How's it look..And where you're going

I need to see her face .. I need to understand

I have to see his face..I need to understand

Why you and I came to an end

Why our relationship should end

Tell me again ..I want to hear

Tell me again..I want to hear

Who broke my faith in all these years

Who broke my trust all this time

Who lay with you at night

Who lay with you at night

When I'm here all alone

When I'm here alone

Remembering when I was your own

Remember when I was yours

I'll let you go

I'll let you go

I'll let you fly

Why do I keep on asking why

Why do I keep asking why

I'll let you go

I'll let you go

Now that I found

Because I found it

A way to keep somehow

Way to look after

More than a broken vow

More than a broken oath

Tell me the words I never said

Tell me words I never said

Show me the tears you never shed

Show me the tears you never shed

Give me the touch

Give me that touch

That one you promoted to be mine

What you promised to be mine

Or has it vanished for all time

Or has it gone nowhere

I close my eyes

I closed my eyes

And dream of you and I

Dream about yourself and me

And then I realize

And then I realized

There's more to life than only bitterness and lies

There are many things in life besides bitterness and lies

I close my eyes

I closed my eyes

I'd give away my soul

I sacrificed my soul

To hold you once again

To hold you once more

Never let this promise end

I will not let this promise end

That song really broke my heart. While looking at the window, I wiped the tears that slowly fell from my eyes. I don't want him to see me this fragile one. Now he is very close to me but also very far from me.

Arriving in front of the boarding house, I want to shake with him

“Kalo so, let me say “happy” first”kataku trying hard

“Promise you will come at my engagement party next week?”

Whahuh? Next sunday? That quick? I never thought she would get engaged so soon.

“Ba..baiklah” said stammering while holding tightness in my chest.

He also went home. I watched his car get farther and farther away and disappeared from my sight.

I opened my boarding door. I see Chika and Lala are still busy watching TV. They were shocked to see me.

“You've come home?”ask Chika

“Where was the tamvan?” ask Lala

I'm just smiling

“I'm tired.I go to the room first ya” said I

I walked into my room without answering their questions.

I opened my room door. Then I put my body in bed. I don't feel my tears flowing anymore. I wept. The tears that I have held since then, I finally can not contain anymore. I'm so sad. This cry accompanies the sadness in my heart.

I opened my phone while I enjoyed the music from the radio that cut my heart. I looked back at the photos of our time together.

I played another video of our memories when we were together. These photos and videos have been with me. When I am sad, I always see it. All those memories are what have kept me alive until now

Why is my love story so stragic? Why is my story just like the movie Anna and The King that I used to sing his song when the first year prince and princess? Could it be a sign from the beginning that my love won't dock with Coco? That we wouldn't be united?

My chest is getting claustrophobic imagining all this. This tear. All the great memories with him. I must bury him deeply. Now, I have to start putting my heart together to see her engaged and finally marry another woman. If only he knew, I still loved him very much. I still miss him a lot. I never lessened my love for her.