Your Spirit from the Water of My Eyes
Chapters 20. Don't Talk Struggle With Me.
For the first time, Ayun reveals all the pent-up flavors over the years. How she struggled to meet the needs of the family with a lack of money, but all this time she managed to do all that until her husband never asked if the money given was enough or not.
"If you want to talk about struggle and hard work, then don't talk in front of me. Because of everything you do, there's nothing compared to me. I was even willing to go around looking for a loan so that you could go to your friend's event just because you feel prestige if you don't come" said Ayun softly.
If given how Ayun struggled in the past, there would probably be no more tears left. There would be no more sweat coming out of his body, as what he went through completely racked up sweat and tears.
"I kept quiet and accepted everything, Mom. I accept all the distress I feel when I'm with you, and I never complain about it. But now that I'm sorry, I'm sorry for being so quiet that you keep your eyes closed and can't see what I've done."
Swing's body trembled as it recalled those moments. Really he did not expect if he could survive until this point, and pass everything.
Hearing all Ayun's words, making Evan's mouth more silent. There was not a single word he could refute, because what the woman said was indeed true.
However, there was one thing that the woman could not do. And Evan gets that thing from another woman, which is love.
"You fought hard with me, Ayun. I'm really lucky, but I'm sorry. You can't make me love you until I fall in love with another woman" Evan said softly. He didn't want to say anything like that, but he had always felt cornered.
Ezra clenched both his hands tightly. He felt that his father had really gone too far, or that his father was now insane.
"20 years, 20 years we're together but you're saying if you don't love me? I really feel like you're amazing, Mom. There may not be a man like you." Swing bitterly smiling.
Well, that's how it should be. Evan continues to hurt his heart, then Ayun will be much easier to make a decision. For him, and also his two hearts.
"I'm sorry, but that's how I feel."
Evan still glorifies the love he currently feels. Like a teenager who is first in love, so that nothing in this world is more important than the feeling that is being felt.
"Stop it before I go completely crazy" Ezra said with great emphasis. His chest up and down held back the vexation, eagerly at this moment he slaughtered his father until he was not human-shaped anymore. Ah, no. His father did not even deserve to be called a man.
"It's okay, son. I deserve to know what your father feels, all this time he must have been tormented for being with a woman he didn't love." Swing reviewed a thin smile while rubbing Ezra's arm, making her stare bitterly.
"alright. All of this can not be continued anymore, for what a relationship continues if one of them feels tortured. And sorry, I can't make you fall in love" Ayun said later. Let it be, let her succumb if all this time her husband has not kept love for her.
Evan remained silent. Unable to argue or no longer willing to talk, he looked away. Swiping his neck that felt heavy, maybe his blood rose because it was too carried away by emotions.
"If you don't stop right now, Dad. You're gonna lose everything, you're gonna really lose everything that's worth."
Ezra turned around and walked quickly into his room. He closed the door violently, until his voice echoed in that place a little strongly.
"You're satisfied, aren't you?"
Ayun sighed harshly when she heard Evan say, why would the man still blame her like this.
"As you say what."
Swing then turned around and went down to the 1st floor, Evan suddenly followed in his footsteps while still feeling annoyed.
"You must be satisfied that you made me and Ezra quarrel. Now say it clearly, Swing. You did all this on purpose so the kids would side with you, right?"
Swing who was holding the door handle of the guest room stopped his hand, his chest burning hot because since then the man's mouth did not stop talking.
"I don't have to do anything to get other people to side with me. Just do what I think is right, and don't commit sins you hold sacred."
Swing immediately opened the door of the room and passed in, he closed it again and did not forget to lock the door so that the bully could not enter.
"Wait, Swing. I'm not done talking!"
Evan banged on the door like a man of infidelity, causing Adel to close his ears with fear. Ezra himself chose to take his clothes and leave the house, while Ayun also covered his ears that felt buzzing.
Swing breathed a sigh of relief when he no longer heard the screams and pounding from Evan. It feels like he's almost crazy right now. No, it's not nearly crazy anymore. He even felt that his soul had been damaged.
Swing up from there to get into the bathroom. He turned on the shower and stood right underneath it.
Both of Ayun's eyes were closed with pain that seemed to scratch his entire soul and body. There are no words that can describe how broken he is at the moment, nothing can even be used as a mere heart support.
"O Allah, your servant is very tired and weak. Is your test still long? Will I be able to get through it all?"
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Tbc.