The Struggle of a Child
Scars
"Duudu!" My sister insulted her doll which always became her companion when she was sad.
His face filled the room. Every corner of the room was only his smile that seemed to stick.
Even my smile was carried away by my brother's happiness. I am so glad that my heart is not crying anymore. A small laugh was made when I saw him staring at his doll.
I who remained standing looked at him more and more fixedly. The rumbling that happened earlier is now silent. I no longer remember my back hurting. That smile turned out to have become medicine for my back. The cute doll became a connector of happiness for me and my sister.
I'm tired of being through today. The school that became the bridge of the future for me has been passed without the slightest burden. The blasphemies that denied me have also been through without blaspheming anyone. The lesson that began at the tip of the pen with pleasure has been completed with loose. No more grievances can drag this weak body into the wretched valley.
Now I just have to lead myself to be a useful child and be proud of my father. I rarely see the sky when I walk or sit. The sky that walks with me as I walk becomes a medicine of tranquility for myself. When this self is raging, the heart becomes tangled only the sky is able to treat it.
And now when the same thing happened I was standing right in front of the window looking up at the sky handing over the shackled grief. The sky was wide as if he knew. He took my sadness and gave me peace.
The warmth that emanated from the sunlight that attached to it also gave its warmth as if the embrace of a mother who loved her child. Like a mother who can swallow the pain of her child, so she was when I saw her. He took my sadness and replaced it with a sincere happy smile amidst the bitterness of life I lived. There are not many words that I can tell right now because everything has surrounded me with endless affection, namely from my Father and my friends.
"Well, uh, shah, scah, hah!" My sister's voice was also heard playing with her cute doll. How happy he is today. I think she'll cry long after I see the clock clinking. "Eh, as it turns out, he can be quiet as well," I muttered seeing my sister.
As soon as I walked up to my sister. And I began to drift in his happiness. A handful of wishful thinking floated in the sky, had my mother been there she would have done, like this to us. We hug when we are sad and coax when we are lashing. In the end I will sleep on my mother's lap.
My sparkling eyes are still fixed on seeing my sister and her cute doll. I approached her and said, "Dik, the doll is cute, yes." Look at the doll that my sister carried.
"Sister likes?" ask sister.
"Yes" I replied directly.
"If you like. Just have Dad buy it for Brother. Let's play a doll. 'Kan exclamations Brother. We both play dolls. There is my brother and sister" said my sister.
I stood looking at my sister's doll. "Dad won't buy it," I said.
My sister who was still holding her dumbest doll stood looking at my sad face. "Why don't you want to, brother?" ask my sister curious.
"Yes. I'll always demand that you don't play much, like you." I turned my head to look at the sky.
I who saw the sky glanced at my sister who was looking at me, like someone who just found out. "Why don't you love Brother playing dolls?" My sister's eyes were still surprised.
"Either! Brother doesn't know." Seeing my brother with the feeling that my father was favoritism. "Sister has been wanting to play with dolls for a long time," I said staring at the nanar out.
My eyes that were running away also saw my sister's doll that until now still holds a sense of wanting to have in my heart. I who often think of myself as a stranger in my own residence began to balance the mood so that I did not dissolve in deep grief.
"Silver. Who's been playing dolls with you?" manya.
"Emmm! Not much, brother." My sister thought backwards. "Kok, suddenly Big Brother asked like that?!" ask my sister to find out.
"Because Brother you never loved holding your doll," I replied with a heartache.
My sister's expression lightly said. I also feel that he does not have, as he has just silently listened to a jolt from him. Then I again saw the bright clouds passed by the birds that were flying foraging to and fro.
They look so neat and also look good. While behind me, I did not hear my sister singing her doll to sleep. Silent without the slightest gurgling.
I'm worried and anxious. Slowly I turned my eyes around investigating my sister, and back, why stay still?
"Ooh, it's my sister... ." I was surprised to see my sister. "Yeah!" I gawk. "He's down?!" I walked closer to him. "He why? What's sleep?" I asked her to peek down. "Ooh, so she cried," I muttered.
His sad-sounding voice made me regret feeling guilty. This feeling just kept screaming blaming me for what happened to my sister.
Hix, hix, hix! That voice is so heartbreaking. "Why did you tell me that I didn't love you to play with this doll?" in his cries. " ' I'll just keep my doll, so it doesn't get damaged. Because if it breaks I don't have any more toys. Huhuhoo!" She held back her cries so as not to be caught by me. "So don't know, if Dad ever said this was my last toy. Hix, hix, hix!" He cried again while muttering softly which was still heard by me.
I was sad to see my sister sitting on her back to me. "If only I had told my brother, he might not have believed me because my brother always said I was my father's favorite son."
Tired of life if every day I have to see the spoiled tears of my sister dripping. The fatigue inside my head made me massage my forehead.
My sister's tears are now shaking my soul that has improved. I went back to my sad brother. "Why are you crying again?" many approached him. "Sister was just kidding, really. Don't take it seriously!" my whiskey.
"Ta-but, why did Big Brother say I never loved my doll to, Brother?" My sister throws a question sadly at me.
I am now surrounded can no longer dodge even for a moment. My voice was closed tightly. "Huh! If I confirmed what I said, she would cry again. And surely my father will hear it?! Then we'll both get angry. Moreover, I will definitely be scolded, if until my sister says what I told my father." Jemari also I knead with my murmur.
I feel so wrong now. If I shut up, my father will be angry and if I say it, my father will be even more angry.
Haduuh! My head is getting dizzy. If only I hadn't said that. It's gonna be okay now. It's like this to be flanked again. It's all too late. My sister's cry again disturbed the room that had been adem. Though I know that my sister is more seniorized by my father. Remembering our mother went home first. Our mother came home when we were too young and my sister was still breastfeeding and could not walk compared to me who could walk and not suckle anymore, even my age was much above my sister.
My dad used to say. 'Liyan, if you and your sister get into a fight, I hope you have to give up because you're bigger than your sister and you're the first child.' That's what I remember when my sister and I started to argue.
Like this, I went back to doing the same thing. "Sir, I'm sorry, yes" I told my sister.
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