How Will You Say Goodbye?
Chapter-4 Bonus

Rey

I found Kinanty who had been registered as a patient with Mitra Husada RSJ on the same day. I greeted him and without guessing he recognized me immediately. I don't know, from the look and twinkle in his eyes, the girl seemed to be very hopeful of me. What am I supposed to do now?

No day without visiting Kinan at the Hospital, I saw he was close friends with a female nurse who was looking after him. The sister was named Sinta, I had to leave a bouquet of flowers to Sinta, to give it to Kinan, because at the same time Ammar had come to visit Kinan, making me unable to meet Kinan.

On the sidelines of my busy work, I still took the time to meet with Kinan. Gradually, I got used to it and felt like there was something lacking if I hadn't met and seen it. I began to feel Kinan was my responsibility. Especially after knowing what her husband did. It feels like anger and emotion are always dominating when it comes to the man named Ammar.

Kinan's answer seemed to make me want to do more for him. He said that Ammar rarely visited him, well maybe only once, inversely with me. I became suspicious that Kinan was not Ammar's son, because if that's his son where might Ammar let Kinan be in the RSJ, right?

If my guess is true.is the baby in Kinan's womb really my child? I could not help my curiosity. Without me noticing, I reflexively began to stroke Kinan's flat stomach gently, where there was a developing fetus there. Although he was surprised, but finally Kinan did not refuse even he seemed to review a smile. Then, again Kinan's answer amazed me and surprised me, he said that my treatment in his mouth at that time was much better than just medicine.

I don't know why hearing her words warms my heart. What if the one he's carrying is really my flesh and blood? Is it possible that Kinan is like this because of me? Was she trying to kill herself because of what I did in the past and her husband couldn't accept the situation?

I made more and more determination in my heart, that Kinan and the baby in his womb are now turning into my responsibility. I don't want to know whose child it is, which I'm obviously going to do as my responsibility for the rants I made on Kinan in the past. At least I have a job and can support the three of us. That was my brief thought at the time.

I don't want to think that at any time Kinan will remember the events of that night, because I was too afraid to imagine it. I was afraid and did not dare to be honest with Kinan, because the comfort when I was with him now was much more important, and I did not want to end this with my honesty.

I'm also afraid that if I'm honest, it'll have an impact on Kinan's psychic health. I don't know when I'll admit it, but everything that's gone so far has been really good and made my fear go overboard. I was afraid of losing all the warm moments between us. Suddenly there was a lot of fear inside me.

If Ammar doesn't want to take responsibility, then let me take over his position as Kinan's husband, then look for my position in Kinan's heart, it's much better isn't it?

Unexpectedly, one day Kinan said he had feelings for me. Yeah, I know that this girl must have more feelings for me. To who else? Ammar? There was no way she would have any feelings for that man. Even if she used to have feelings for her husband, maybe now it is lost due to the actions of her own husband and my presence that she can always rely on, of course. I can be a little proud of myself for being able to win the heart of the girl I want. How are you doing with my own feelings for him? I don't know.

I'm glad that Kinan has high hopes for me. I don't deny that I'm very happy with his confession. I once said that Kinan could wish a very great wish only on me, and see now? He really did!!! I feel like cheering for joy!

Now I am confused by my own feelings. At first I just wanted to be responsible without any feelings, but the eyes that looked at me were full of twinkle as if asking me to reply with the same thing. Her blabbering lips plain and full of light scares me to lose, her sometimes spoiled attitude and piling great hopes on me, little by little began to open the door of my long-closed heart. This scraping of my head's hardness.

I always dismissed the vibrations that arise when an accidental touch occurs between us. It's different, much different when I was with Mona-then. I used to look at Mona and it started with pity, just like I looked at Kinan at the beginning of our meeting. But now, I looked at Kinan with a different look and feel. There's always a weird swish and vibe that I don't even feel when I was with Mona-before.

As I stared at her fainted face on my lap, it was then that I realized that this girl had taken some of my attention and heart. At that time he ran away from RSJ, coinciding with me who ran away from home because of a debate with Papa. A very cliche coincidence. I found him and helped him.

I watched him more and more in silence when we were already living together at Kevin's family's Villa. When she was wearing Kevin's Keyra-sister shirt, Kinan looked different, making me smile with a sense of awe as well as a sense of liking that blended into one. I have a hard liking to express. Not ordinary but extraordinary. I think she's the only girl who can make me curious and nervous at the same time.

As I brushed her hair and looked at her face in the mirror, I felt my heart warm again. Especially when you hear him calling me with a special call. Ah, it seems like I have to admit defeat at the moment. I've fallen to the charm of a girl whose status is someone else's wife.

I held back the turmoil as I peeked at her lips. Again the vibration appeared when we touched. It's not just lust, but I want it more than that. Fear of losing and want to have forever. Especially when I teach her to kiss. Kinan is very amateurish or arguably not an expert at all. Instead of being disappointed by his incompetence, I grew curious. Holy jeez!!

I'm still trying to get rid of all those weird feelings I've never felt before. Trying and trying to divert, I wanted to focus with an attitude of responsibility without any more feelings towards Kinan. Not because of anything, but I was afraid of being used and hurt again like my past. But again I had to lose and admit defeat. Kinan won, he won my heart. Kinan couldn't possibly use me, right? I'm sure I'll leave my feelings to him right now.

As she looked at me and just blinked in her innocent manner, I couldn't stand it anymore either. I admit in myself that...I fell in love with her with a really strong feeling.

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Okey... Pov Rey end's.

Next Chapter back to their House... I'll take a surprise there. Where are the Vote Yok and the prize?😂