How Will You Say Goodbye?
Furies

"No need, what I saw was already an accurate explanation!"

"Then divorce me!"

Hearing Kinan's statement, Ammar snorted. His face was flushed with anger. Then he left Kinan in the room without a word.

...Brakkkk!!!...

Ammar closed the door of the room violently, venting his anger there.

After Ammar's departure, Kinan lamented his ironic fate. He was still wearing a wet shirt and was not eager to replace it.

Kinan sat in the corner of the room. He drowned his face in his own lap while sobbing.

"Why? Why does all this have to happen to me? Isn't my relationship with Ammar just about to begin?" He asked himself.

Kinan could not understand what happened to him, as if the universe did not allow him to be happy. Even his relationship with the new Ammar would be well-built had to wither before it developed.

Kinan realized, he had not loved Ammar and vice versa. But why seeing the treatment of Ammar who did not want to hear his explanation first made him very hurt.

Shouldn't Ammar be the one protecting Kinan? And Ammar should be looking for the brengs*k that ruined his wife?

Then why does Ammar seem to give up his responsibilities? Without hearing a word of explanation from Kinan's mouth, Ammar only digested what he had in mind after what he saw?

"Why mas? You should have known that what you saw was not necessarily what you imagined?" lirih Kinan in heart.

Kinan was down, but he suddenly felt angry. Angry at himself. Why could he be this reckless to the point of ruining his own pride.

Angry at the man who took away his chastity without knowing who it was.

Being disgusted with himself, feeling dirty and meaningless.

Disappointed about Ammar's attitude that should not be so. usually Ammar will maturely respond to everything.

After feeling fed up with the raging thoughts, Kinan suddenly got up from his seat, he looked around for something in the nightstand drawer. But, my brother got what he was looking for.

Kinan turned to the dresser drawer. He found a box of razors that Ammar used to shave. He took one and opened it.

For some reason, it is the devil who dominates his mind and heart.

Kinan decided to take the last road that seemed like it was all that appeared in his mind.

*******

The loud music, the dim atmosphere and the colorful flash of lights glittered at the busy people in the city's biggest nightclub.

In a VVIP room in the club, as usual there are three friends who often spend their nights drunk.

"Lo crazy, Nyuk! So you tidu*in that chick from yesterday?"

The person who had just given the confession seemed to nod in answer to the question of his sinful comrade.

"God! Don't you want to help him? Lo sayin I can not see the clear, but you also lust the same girl!" Reply to her friend again with a mocking smile.

The man in question was just silent without a word as if thinking about something that had already passed.

"Woy lo don't usually like this? Why are you a gini? Stress lo? You're wearing a safety deposit, right?"

The man looked weak.

"B*go! Trus if you are pregnant with your child how? Why not anticipate anyway? Like a kid yesterday afternoon!"

"Gue didn't know everything was going to be gini b*go! You know I'm drunk! I can't control myself either! My initial intention was to nolongin tuh chick!" finally he voiced out after being judged on his friend's question.

The three of them were still with their activities while smoking and finishing the drinks they had ordered.

"Trus what's your next plan?"

He nodded weakly again.

"Eh kunyuk! And yaudah is ordinary! I never slept with a woman! Why do you also become confused gini!" Said the other friend who from the beginning just silently listened.

"That's not the problem! You know I've never dealt with a good girl. I know that I have brengs*k! So I was just having a momentary relationship with the same girl as me!"

Both of his friends looked at him confused.

"meaning?"

"I mean, the girl who was yesterday-" her explanation was interrupted.

"Wait, wait ! Don't tell me that girl from yesterday was a good girl who was a virgin and you ruined her!"

The man nodded again without a rebuttal.

Those who heard could only shake their heads slowly.

"Emang fits you to be called brengs*k! even yourself admit it!" His friend who was much silent chimed in while patting his shoulder.

The man scratched his hair violently and ruffled it.

"What do I need to do? I'm confused! From the beginning, I did not find his identity. Where am I going to find him?"

"Why do you want to find him too? Who you have will be charged b*go! Indirectly you're his name mengk*sa him, kunyuk!"

The man who was touched with words by his two friends rubbed his face repeatedly with his own hands.

"Arkkkh!! I feel guilty!" Gusar.

The answer was a confused look by his two friends, then they both laughed out loud..

"Lo crazy! Br*you're feeling guilty? My stomach ache!"

"Hahaha do you really feel guilty or are you really afraid that she is pregnant with your child?" The other chimpanzee kept laughing.

"It's no use huh lang lo bedua! I'm also free to tell a long story, you can't give me a solution!" The man stared intently at his two friends who were still busy with his drink and laughed at him.

He took the keys to his car on the table and left the night club with an unknown taste.

******

Kinan blinked his eyes, his vision was blurry but he realized white was now more dominant in his eyesight. Slowly starting to light up. He realized that he was in a room.

He saw Minah sleeping next to him and Ammar sleeping on the sofa.

He moved slowly, wanting to squirm but difficult. His body was very heavy and the pain in the core was still very pronounced.he slightly grimaced with the pain.

Minah who realized there was movement beside her also made a sound after staring at Kinan.

"Bak Kinan is conscious?" Ask.

"Where is bi?" Back asked in a hoarse voice.

"In-in-the-hospital mbak!"

Kinan fell silent and digested Minah's reply. He remembered what he did last night. He glanced at his bandaged wrist.

"God! What have I done?" His mind was softly speaking.

"So soon, I wake you up!" Minah said as she got up from her sitting position.

Kinan nodded and glanced at the clock on the wall of his nursing room. Half-time in the morning.

Minah woke up Ammar who seemed to be awake at the first call.

Ammar got up from his position and approached Kinan in the patient bed.

"Thank God you're conscious. Forgive my attitude!" His word.

Hearing Ammar's statement, Kinan felt a little relieved because it seemed like there was not much anger from his face.

"Kinan, I understand you've accepted me in your life!" Ammar said without anger from his tone.

"I also understand you don't love me yet, maybe you have a lover out there and you haven't ended your relationship with him because of our sudden marriage" Ammar paused his words while breathing heavily.

Kinan stared at the puzzled statement of Ammar.

"I'm not forcing you! But can you appreciate me being your husband now? Don't meet her again and end your relationship! Then, don't act stupid like this again to cover up your unhealthy relationship with her! I'll try to accept!" Ammar continued again which made Kinan stunned and seemed to have no words to reply to Ammar's statement.

Ammar deduced for himself what Kinan had experienced. Kinan looked at her confusedly as well as disappointed.

Even Ammar did not hear a single word from Kinan's mouth about why Kinan did this stupid thing. Ammar did not ask for an explanation why Kinan wanted to end his life.

Kinan held back all the raging feeling in his heart. Anger at the person who broke it and now anger at Ammar who did not question at all what Kinan had been through.

Kinan also felt disappointed with himself as to why he was acting stupid. Kinan felt scared, embarrassed, and useless anymore.

Kinan's tears had pooled in his eyes, as if he wanted to spill like a flood.

After saying this, Ammar left Kinan helpless. He did not ask how Kinan was and what Kinan was feeling.

Disillusioned. Again, that was also what was raging in Kinan's chest saw Ammar's actions.

Why is it as if Ammar doesn't want to know why Kinan did such a reckless thing? Why did Ammar turn a blind eye to this? Why even Ammar concluded himself that Kinan did this only to cover up his mistake that seemed to have betrayed Ammar.

Kinan was silent to the reality. That, his life as a kara in this world, now feels more alone.

Moreover, he had to live his own life with a broken heart and an equally broken body.

It was probably a family-less kinan again, the only relatives left behind.

But he still had a happy feeling. And he used to have a burning spirit. But now? He was completely alone without passion and felt insignificant.

💠💠💠💠💠

Kinan underwent hospital treatment for a few days and was accompanied only by Minah. Today he was allowed to go home.

Inevitably Kinan had to go home to Ammar. He wanted to run away and not stay there anymore, he was so embarrassed. But the status of his marriage to Ammar seemed to tie him to stay at Ammar's house.

Ammar said nothing, and he had no intention of divorcing Kinan after all that had happened. I don't know why. Only Ammar knows his own way of thinking.

Kinan entered the house accompanied by Minah.

As usual, Kinan was always greeted by Latifa voice who always belittled and introgated him. But after all that happened, it seems Latifa is not just doing that right now. Looks like it's gonna get worse.

"The timid self-knowing! Already lived it even ensnare the people who live it! That innocent face of yours doesn't guarantee your behavior out there!" The words of greeting from Latifa's mouth when she saw Kinan coming home.

Kinan, who was now discouraged, did not criticize Latifa's speech. He chose to remain silent without a word and continued his slow path towards the main room.

Kinan still heard Latifa mocking him as she stepped up. But again Kinan no spirit to serve Latifa.

Arriving at the main room, Kinan took his things that felt like he had just moved to this room yesterday.

Kinan decided to move back to his old room before he and Ammar got married.

Ammar doesn't seem to be home. He's at work. So Kinan is easy to move to the back room.

After all his things were done, Kinan threw himself into his room. He thought again about how the incident that happened to him yesterday could happen.

Kinan tried to toughen up. He broke himself, didn't know what to do. Especially in front of Ammar. It was as if he had no self-respect. In fact, Ammar does not know what really happened.

"If Mas Ammar can't help me uncover who the perpetrators who harassed me, then I have to look for it myself" muttered Kinan while sobbing.

Kinan's vegetables heard people talking from the back porch. Because Kinan's room located in the back allows him to hear the voice of other people's conversations. Although, I don't know what they're discussing.

Kinan wiped away the tears on his cheeks. He recalled whose voice seemed to be talking to Latifa.

It sounded like they were laughing and seemed to be cursing a few times and mentioning Kinan's name.

"Shy?" Kinan guessed it was Shirly's voice.

He remembered the event before the catastrophe on him happened.

"Didn't Shirly say she was going home to her parents in Bali? Why is he still here?" Mumbled Kinan himself.

Kinan wanted to know what they were talking about, because Kinan was sure all this happening had something to do with them.

Kinan remembers the last time he was home before the disaster happened was when he was with Shirly in the kitchen.

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Seriate...