EMBRACE YOU: Presence & Poison
Episode 17's

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“Bu don't say that! Brother has been very kind to me all this time, he's been replacing all that investment money. Big brother who paid me school.”

“He must do that! You should know how devastated Mom was when your father left us! It's not enough for her to take responsibility for the suffering of mom and you.”

“Bu!! Stop that!! Mom hurt sister!”

Why stop mom? Why not continue so that the mother's heart is better? You're right, it's not enough to punish me. I seemed fine now that I could work with a good job for my young age, I also went to graduate school.

Everything is too fine for me, right ‘kan ma'am?

“Already, better mom just go. I've had enough of dealing with your sister today.”

“Bu! Haishh...” Daniel seemed to have ruffled his hair confused, then he looked at me.

“Kak, please think about what I said earlier. I want to catch up with mom. See you kak.”

As far as Daniel goes, I'm still staring at the empty chair that my mother was sitting in. Then what I feel next is emptiness and the feeling of wanting to get out of this situation. I don't know what scale I used to measure my heart ache.

My brain turned back to that memory, when my father and mother had a fight, when my father left us and when my mother started to hate me.

That's right what Rey said, I was stupid. I'm a fool for not knowing how I now have to put my heart in order. I was devastated again after trying to stand up straight.

My shaking hands were raised touching my neck. It hurt there and I couldn't make my voice. I fell back into the darkest well in me.

I was no longer crying like that, now I can only hope, this number that I will call can help me get my voice out again.

***

“Gosh Icha!! I didn't expect you to visit me again here.”

I smiled slightly as an adult female figure greeted me at the door when I just got out of the taxi.

This woman wearing her doctor suit immediately hugged me very tightly. As usual, the fragrant vanilla emanating from his body was very familiar in my nose.

“I was very surprised when you sent me a message. We better talk inside.” Doctor Cilia pulled me into the hospital. He took me to the cafeteria and he was standing in front of the booth.

“It's been more than six years we haven't met. You're all right, right? Have you had lunch?”

I'm shaking.

“What do you want to eat? Oh is your favorite menu still like before?”

I nodded and smiled slightly answering her question. Doctor Cilia looked excited as she ordered food for the two of us. This woman does not change, she is always cheerful.

After ordering to deliver the food and drink that Cilia's doctor ordered to her room to the seller, this woman again pulled my hand towards her room.

The atmosphere of this hospital is still the same as before. What changed was just the color of the paint looked new. I'm glad I can think of something else.

“Waahh you're getting beautiful huh Cha. I remember you used to dance so rarely. I never even wear lipstick.

Now it's becoming more feminine.” Doctor Cilia smiled teasingly at me as I was already sitting on the sofa of her room.

I just smiled, not intending to be disrespectful to her just that my circumstances were forcing me.

I've tried it, during the taxi ride from the cafe to this hospital, my condition is the same as it was seven years ago. Was I too mean to call her when I was like this?

“When did you come back from out of town? You should have called me so we could meet outside.”

I hesitated, but I finally took out a small notebook from my bag with a pen and was going to write

something to him but suddenly the two objects were forcibly taken by him.

I moved both my hands to say something to her with sign language that I was biased with and had learned.

“Good news. Currently I—“

Doctor Cilia held my hand so as to stop her movement. He looked at me worried.

“What? What's with your voice? What the hell's going on? Is this a joke to meet me?!” I nodded, smiling bitterly at him.

As I thought, Doctor Cilia immediately hugged me very tightly then I heard her voice trembling withstanding the cries. “Yeah! How could? How is this Cha? How-how-? Why you should experience it!”

Furthermore Doctor Cilia had already cried a hiccup in my arms, my chest was warm to realize that there was someone who cared and loved me so much as Doctor Cilia. This woman has helped me a lot.

She let go of his embrace and looked at me with her wet eyes. “How are you doing now? What do you feel?”

My chest has been very painful since. I didn't expect much, now I don't know who else to fight for. If I wanted to recover because I wanted to make my mother and Daniel happy, but I felt like I didn't want to see me anymore. That hatred was still very real in the look in his eyes. Whatever I do is always wrong in my eyes.

I did not have time to answer, the vibration of the phone in my bag distracts me. I reached out and found Daniel calling me.

I hesitantly answered the phone and stuck the flat object in front of my ear.

“Halo? Icha Ka? You hear me?” I couldn't answer but from his tone of voice Daniel panicked.

“Ka, Mom fell unconscious when we came home there was a reintenir who came and ruffled the house. I forgot to say if I borrowed money on them as well for investment. Ka Icha just mad at me. I am indeed a useless sister—“

“Who are you calling?”

“Oh mother? Already conscious? I called ka Icha, told her that mom passed out—“

“Close phone! Do you think your brother would run here? Don't waste time calling her, just thinking about it makes you sick. I don't know what made her come from my mother's womb!”

“Mother! Stop saying that! Mother's words hurt me too!!”

Can't!

I can't listen to him anymore!

That's too painful!

I can't take it anymore!!

I don't want to hear it!!

“Icha!! Hey what happened?” Doctor Cilia held both of my shoulders, shook me and I realized that I had thrown my phone and cracked the screen.

My heart hurts so much, I want to cry hard but I can only cry in silence while looking at her. My breathing is hard now.

Everything got worse when I clearly saw Doctor Cilia shouting in front of me but I could not hear her. My ears only heard a loud noise.

My world is broken now.

I want to get out of here, I want to disappear so as not to feel all this pain. I hate myself!

After that, everything darkened with the sound of Cilia's doctor shouting heard in the last seconds before my consciousness disappeared.

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